June 28, 2026: "Caterpillars"
The week before last, there were many caterpillars on one of the outer walls of my home
before they turned into chrysalises.
They must have wanted to crawl up high
to turn into chrysalises there.
I am certain of this because by the time I noticed, some had already become chrysalises at the highest point.
Since they are part of nature, I wanted to leave them alone, but
the place where I live has cleaning services from a management company.
I have watched the orb-weaver spider that lives by my front door
have its web destroyed many times.
These caterpillars would surely be cleaned away too,
and disposed of as trash.
I agonized over it, but decided to protect them.
I could only protect the ones within my reach.
Then, the next day, when I checked,
sure enough, not a single chrysalis remained in the higher spots I couldn't reach.
I also found one that had turned into a chrysalis
in the narrow gap between my front door and the window frame.
There is no way it could have become an adult in such a gap.
I protected two chrysalises and several caterpillars.
A total of three butterflies successfully emerged,
and they returned to the place where they were born.
The thrill of the moment they fly away is incredible.
However, on the other hand,
there were also those that perished.
First, the one that was in my front door frame.
Can you see the hole in it?
That is the mark where a parasite emerged.
This one had been parasitized.
I wanted this one to emerge as a butterfly too, but...
But parasites are not necessarily evil.
Because there is no good or evil in life.
And then, there are two chrysalises that still remain today.
These ones have an odd color,
so their lives have likely already burned out.
But, betting on a slim hope,
they are still in their cradles even now.
And the one that left the biggest impression on me is this one.
As you can see if you watch the video, this little one
was a butterfly that failed to emerge properly.
At first, I was happy, thinking it was in the middle of emerging.
I thought, 'I get to see the emergence with my own eyes!'
I hurriedly pointed my smartphone camera at it to film,
and I kept recording the whole time.
However, no matter how much time passed, there was no progress.
It just kept peeking its face out a little bit the whole time.
But I held back and endured.
Emergence is a very delicate and difficult process.
There was nothing I could do to help.
I just watched over it intently.
An hour passed, two hours passed,
and even after four hours, there was still no progress.
At this point, the situation changed.
Leaving it like this would become a matter of life and death.
In a normal emergence, they come out of the chrysalis with a soft body,
and then, taking their time,
they stretch their bodies, complete their form, and fly away.
Four hours had already passed for this little one.
Its body had finished forming
while still tucked inside the chrysalis.
Its wings would not open,
and of course, it was impossible for it to fly into the sky.
It was a child that could not live its life as a butterfly.
As I gently took it out of the shell so as not to hurt it, I thought about many things.
If I could talk to this little one,
I wondered what it would say to me.
Is it lamenting its fate?
Of course it would be, I thought, as I took it out of the shell.
This little one no longer had the strength to even hold onto anything;
perhaps it had grown weak because too much time had passed.
I used a small fish net as a foothold for it,
made some sugar water, soaked a tissue in it,
and used a toothpick to hook the butterfly's proboscis
and stretch it out onto the wet tissue.
Then, although it was weak,
I could tell it was drinking properly.
Seeing that, I found the answer to my earlier question.
They, once born,
have no choice but to live.
'I wonder if it's grieving'
'I wonder if it's sad'
Realizing that such thoughts were merely my own shallow assumptions,
as I watched the little one that couldn't become a butterfly drinking sugar water,
I felt it keenly, and was filled with a feeling akin to remorse.
Living, that's all it really takes, isn't it?
Thinking that,
I simply watched over the butterfly drinking sugar water.
Of course, this little one who couldn't live as a butterfly,
until its life faded away,
as long as it continued to wish for life,
I intended to take responsibility and look after it.
However, when I checked the next day,
the life of the little one that couldn't become a butterfly had faded, and it lay still.
Although it was for a very short time,
in my heart, which had been vividly shown
a life that was fierce and yet far too resilient,
something that cannot be put into words,
a feeling that should not be treated lightly, had sprouted.
Living is truly amazing, isn't it?
I relearned a very important lesson this time.
I wonder if it will come back as a caterpillar again?
But really, you shouldn't come to the wall anymore!!!!
That was the story.
Well then, see you in the next post!