Tennis Improvement Memo 464. "Unpleasant words?" Reading an article about Ichiro makes me realize that self-esteem is truly easily misunderstood

This time, it is a "Tennis Improvement Memo" written after looking at "Yahoo News".

A topic regarding a project called "Troubled Adult Consultation Live #Ichi-Q&A" which was distributed by "Daily" on 2023/12/21.

Yahoo version
https://news.yahoo.co.jp/articles/c7098e14147465db418b458005503285fdaaf098

Daily version
https://www.daily.co.jp/mlb/2023/12/21/0017154069.shtml

Reading this article about Ichiro, I realize that self-esteem is a concept that is truly easily misunderstood.

When anyone is suddenly asked for an opinion on a word they have never heard before, it is natural that they can only answer within the scope of the images they already have.

Since they lack knowledge, they can only talk about that word based on the impressions they have seen and heard so far.

That is the same even for the great athlete Ichiro.

Asking him to talk about "self-esteem," which he had "never seen before", is unreasonable, no matter how much it is a program project.

For example, suppose I saw or heard the word "gender-free" for the first time today.

A literal translation could lead to an interpretation of "freedom of gender? Something suspicious!".

However, the original meaning of "gender-free" is, I believe, that both men and women live as themselves without being bound by socially defined gender roles.

Instead of deciding that men should work or women should prioritize housework and childcare, it is more like, women can work if they want to, and men can prioritize housework and childcare if they want to.

If you have the knowledge, I think the impression will be completely different from an interpretation like "freedom of gender? Something suspicious!".

"Self-esteem" is, as I always say, a feeling that is truly easily misunderstood.

Interpretations like "not being denied even when clearly wrong", or "only looking back on good things about oneself", or "not being pointed out by third parties", which Ichiro had to answer on the spot, are completely different.

With this, is the impression "self-esteem is being easy on yourself" ...???

Is that really the case?

The original self-esteem defined by psychology is "a feeling of being able to cherish yourself as you are".

Therefore, because you cherish yourself, it is actually the exact opposite of Ichiro's interpretation, and you look back on and try to correct your bad points.

It is not "not being pointed out by third parties," but rather, if pointed out by a third party, self-esteem is trying to accept it honestly.

Rather, when the sense of self-denial becomes strong, you get a feeling of "I don't care about myself!", which is a negative feeling about yourself, and because you don't care, you stop looking back on your bad points.

If you are "pointed out by a third party," because a sense of self-denial and high pride are "completely directly proportional," you feel "I've been denied! (My pride has been hurt!)" and you might lash out. To borrow Ichiro's words, the ones who "degenerate" are not those who can affirm themselves, but the opposite: those with a strong sense of self-denial.

*People with high self-esteem might be thought to have high pride, but it is "the exact opposite", so perhaps this complexly intertwined impression makes it even easier to be misunderstood.

Now, I am not trying to deny Ichiro.

If asked for an opinion on self-esteem, which he had "never seen before", on the spot on a program, whether it is Ichiro or anyone else, that is a natural reaction.

Don't we tend to deny people who make slightly wrong interpretations?

That lowers self-esteem.

Because a sense of denying others and a sense of self-denial are also "completely directly proportional".

I might be one of those people, as I keep denying the common-sense tennis instruction that tries to fix forms (bitter smile).

On the other hand, high self-esteem and high self-affirmation of others are also "completely directly proportional".

Therefore, people with truly high self-esteem often "like" people who "dislike them" (although people who dislike you tend to be disliked by you in return).

And when you can "accept" things like that, your self-esteem will increase more and more, without limit.

And the "heart-rich and happy life" that everyone desires is there.

P.S.
So I also intend to remain in a position where I worry from afar, at least saying "it can't be helped because it's common sense now" regarding tennis instruction that tries to fix forms.

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