Important Points Men Look At Besides the Face | This Is Why They Beat Beauties

Kizuko-san
“Goro-san... is it true that for men,
in the end, it all comes down to the face...?”

Goro-san
“Hmm, that question.
I think a lot of women are probably very curious about that.”

Kizuko-san
“Because in the end,
it feels like cute or pretty people are the ones who get chosen...”

Goro-san
“Of course, men are human too, so
we start with appearances at first.”

Kizuko-san
“I knew it...”

Goro-san
“However. For men, the women we think are ‘pretty’
and the ‘women we find ourselves chasing before we know it’
aren't necessarily the same people.”

Kizuko-san
“Huh? What do you mean?”

Goro-san
“Of course, polishing your appearance is important.
But actually, the longer a relationship lasts,
the more men really look at ‘something’ other than the face.”

Kizuko-san
“Something... other than the face?”

Goro-san
“Yes. And what’s more,
that’s not something you can create with just techniques.”

Kizuko-san
“Oh, I’m curious...!”

Goro-san
"So this time, I'm going to explain
'the important points men look at besides the face'
."

You might be able to develop your charm even further,
so please be sure to watch until the end.

--------------------------------------------------------------

Men sense the feelings women have about themselves

This time,
I will talk about
'the important points men look at besides the face'.

But first,
I'm going to say something very important.

That is,
just because I'm talking about
'points men look at besides the face',
it doesn't mean you can give up on your facial appearance
at all.

This is true for both men and women, but
people are attracted to those who are
'trying to be even more attractive than they are now'
.

It's not just about whether your facial features are perfect,
but also,

for example,
- trying to improve your skin
- taking care of your hair
- keeping your teeth clean
- wearing makeup that suits you

That kind of
'feeling of treating yourself with care' actually comes across
from your face very strongly.

Conversely,
when you start treating yourself carelessly, thinking 'I'm just...',
that feeling also comes across from your face. In fact, I used to work as a director and saw many women.

Among them,
there were many women with faces that anyone would call beautiful,
or very cute.

But,
when I heard about their love lives,
there were women who had many experiences with men,
but had experienced
'happy love' almost never.

What I felt at that time was that
even if you are naturally blessed with facial features, women who treat themselves carelessly
will, as a result, be more easily treated carelessly by men,
that was it.

This is
not just a matter of mental attitude.

In psychology, too,
it is said that people unconsciously have a premise of
'what kind of treatment I deserve'
.

And that premise is,
not just in words,

・Sense of distance
・Attitude
・How you say no
・How you receive things
・How you express emotions
and so on, which tend to show naturally.

For example,
・Being unable to say no even when you actually want to
・Laughing it off even when hurt
・Being too accommodating to others
・Accepting ambiguous treatment

If this state continues,
the other person will also unconsciously
start to feel,
"It's okay to treat them this way."

This is something also discussed in attachment theory and
research on boundaries in human relationships.

In other words,
"What kind of person am I to be treated as?"
—your own sense of this
manifests as the atmosphere of your relationships.

Therefore, whether you feel
"I am a person to be cherished"
or

whether you feel
"It can't be helped if I'm treated poorly"

this difference insenseshows up
not just in a person's face,
but in other areas as well.

And
what I am talking about this time
is not so much about
the first impression upon meeting,

・When a relationship has started to form a little.
・After meeting a few times.
・When the initial excitement and freshness have settled down a bit.

At that time,
what men start to look at unconsciouslyis what I'm talking about.

Because,
at first, after all,
the impression of appearance is strong.

This is natural as a human being.

However,
as they meet a few times, men
begin to feel, "How do I feel when I'm with this person?"

・Do I feel at ease?
・Do I feel tired?
・Do I want to see them again?

They start to look at that
quite unconsciously.

That is why this time,
I am talking about
"things other than the face,"

but that said,
・body lines,
・fashion,
・the way you walk,
・or gestures
are not what I want to talk about.

For those who want to know about that,
there is plenty of information in the world, such as fashion magazines and beauty-related content,
and I recommend
sparing no effort on your appearance there.

However,
in reality,
no matter how beautiful a face is,
no matter how good the fashion is,
no matter how good the style is,

there are women who continue to be loved,
and women who, for some reason, continue to struggle in love.

What is the difference?

That is
the feeling that "I am a person who is cherished."

And, men
actually perceive this feeling quiteunconsciously.

Of course,
they are not confirming it with words.

But,
from the aura of that woman,
they feel "how this woman treats herself."

So,
where does that feeling
specifically appear?

That is the
"key point men look at besides the face"
that I am about to tell you,

and I believe there are broadly
three such points.

The first isreaction.

The second ishow you express your wishes.

The third ishow you deal with your own emotions.

Now, I will explain them one by one.

---------------------------------------------------

Key point men look at besides the face ① Reaction

The first point is reaction.

For example,
・When you take them out for a meal.
・When you compliment them.
・When you make time for them.
・When you do something for them.

At those times,
・Do they show genuine joy?
・Are their emotions moved?
・Can they accept it honestly?

Men look at this
quite subconsciously.

Of course,
this doesn't mean you should overreact
or offer fake praise.

Rather,
women who have a sense that
“I am a person worthy of being cherished”
are relatively more likely to
accept kindness and affection from others honestly.

Therefore,
in reactions like
“Thank you,”
“I’m so happy,”
or “That was fun,”
a natural atmosphere of
“Thank you for cherishing me”comes through.

When this is present,
men are very happy.

This is because when a woman is happy due to his actions,

“I was able to make this person happy”
a man is more likely to feel that sense of accomplishment.

This is also supported by neuroscience,
which suggests that when someone is happy
because of your actions,
the brain's reward system
is easily stimulated.

In other words,
a woman who can express joy honestly
becomes a reward for the man as well.

That is why,
in front of a woman who can be happy honestly,
a man's
“desire to please switch” is easily triggered.

The feelings of
“I want to see more of her smile,”
“I want to cherish her more,”
and “I want to make her even happier”begin to stir naturally.

However, there is something important here.

It is that,
even when treated with the same kindness,
there are those who can
accept that affection honestlyand those who
have a hard time accepting it.

For example,
“I feel bad for having you do this for me…”
“It’s probably just at the beginning…”
“There’s no way someone like me could be cherished…”
“Isn’t there an ulterior motive?…”

There are people who, in this way,
doubt the other person's affection, or
find it difficult to accept.

This is not a matter of
having a bad personality, or
being twisted.

It is said in attachment theory that
people learn the sense of
“Am I someone who is cherished?”
through their human relationships in childhood.

For example,
・I couldn't rely on others with peace of mind.
・My feelings were not accepted.
・I felt that I wouldn't be loved unless I worked hard.
・I had many experiences of being suddenly treated coldly.

When these experiences accumulate,
the brain and nerves
tend to create programs such as
“People might leave at any time,”
“Feeling safe leads to getting hurt,”
“Having expectations is dangerous.”

As a result,
even though you should be happy,
doubt comes out before you can accept it honestly.

This can also be said to be a state where the bodyguard inside you,
in other words,

the amygdala in the brainwhich is a danger detection system, is reacting first.

Before you can accept kindness as “safety,”
the system that says “let's be on guard so I don't get hurt” starts moving.

Conversely,
people who have relatively developed a sense that “it is okay for me to be cherished”
find it easier to accept the other person's affection as safety.

Therefore,
an atmosphere of
“I'm happy,”
“Thank you,”
“I feel cherished”
tends to naturally appear in their reactions.

And men feel that difference,
not with their heads, but with their senses.

That is why
a reaction
is not just about acting cheerful.

“It is okay for me to be cherished”
—can you accept the other person's affection with that feeling?

This is
the point that men unconsciously look at besides the face.

------------------------------------------------------------

Important point men look at besides the face ② How to express your wishes

The second is how to express your wishes.

For example,
“I like this kind of restaurant,”
“I'm happy spending time like this,”
“I feel safe when you do this for me,”
“I like this kind of relationship.”
Whether or not you can properly express these wishes.

Here,
“I am a person who is cherished”
a sense of this emerges.

A woman who cherishes herself
does not just accommodate the other person,
but also properly maintains her own sense of comfort.

However, she does not express this
as a command or control.
“Why won't you do this for me?”
“Usually you would do this, right?”
“If you love me, you should understand.”

Instead,
she expresses it in the form of
“I would be happy if it were like this.”

In love,
“if you keep accommodating the other person, things will go well”
is not necessarily true.

At first,
a woman who can accommodate the other person
seems kind,
and makes a good impression.

But,
if you keep suppressing your own wishes,
inside your heart,
stress will gradually accumulate.

・I actually didn't like it.
・I was actually lonely.
・I actually wanted you to do this.

But I can't say it.

Then, at some point,
“Why don't you understand?”
“Why don't you cherish me?”
it becomes easy to explode.

In psychology, this is also said to be
the boundary between oneself and the other person,

in other words,
“where I end and where the other person begins”
is something that easily happens when it becomes ambiguous,
it is said.

If you accommodate the other person too much,
you lose track of your own feelings.

That is why, in daily life,
being able to gently express
“I would be happy if it were like this” is important.

And what is important here is
“expressing your wishes when you are in a good state”
is what it means.

When you are full of anxiety or anger, and you say,
"Do this!"
or "Why don't you understand?",
the other person's nerves easily go into defensive mode.

However, when you are relatively calm and
in a comfortable state,
you can say things like,
"I like this kind of thing,"
"I'm happy when we spend time like this,"
"I feel at ease when you do this for me."

By doing this, you scatter your wishes around the other person.

Then, it becomes easier for a man to understand
how he should cherish that woman.
Not all men are good at picking up on things.

Men are not all good at reading between the lines.

But when they know a woman's wishes,
it becomes easier for them to move toward fulfilling them.

And actually, humans tend to be interested not only in
“the person themselves,”
but also in “what the other person is interested in.”

In other words, by looking at a woman's wishes, a man is feeling
"What does this person find comfortable?"
"What kind of time do they value?"
"What kind of world does this person live in?"

Therefore,
a man is naturally more likely to be interested in a woman who clearly shows her wishes.
The feelings of

"I want to know more about this person,"
"I want to make this person happier,"
and "I want to see the world this person likes"
become easier to stir up.

However, what is important here is that
showing your wishes and
forcing your wishes on someone are different things.

If it turns from "I like this" into "You should do this,"

the man will feel like he is being controlled,

and his feelings will easily drift away.

Even in psychology, it is said that
when people feel their freedom is about to be taken away,
a "reaction of wanting to resist"
is likely to occur.

Therefore,
desires are not something to be forced upon others,
but something to show by saying, "This is what makes me feel comfortable."

And actually,
many women struggle with this.
People who say, "I don't know what my own desires are."
This is quite common.

In fact, that might be because
you have been suppressing your own desires for a long time.
・To avoid being disliked.
・To avoid being a burden.
・To avoid ruining the mood.

By doing that,
you have developed a habit of
prioritizing others over your own feelings.

Or,
the habit of thinking only with your head has become so strong that,
before you can feel "what do I want" with your senses,
you end up searching for the correct answer in your head.

But originally, desires aresensationsbefore they are logic.

There is a phrase, "voice of the heart," isn't there?

In reality, the heart reacts with
sensations before it reacts with words.

"I feel calm somehow"
"I feel uncomfortable somehow"
"I feel safe somehow"
"I like it somehow"

What happens first isphysical sensation.

Even in neuroscience, it is said that for people,
the body and emotions react before thoughts do.

In other words,
the power to feel desire is also
the "power to feel your own sensations."

Therefore,
a woman who can express her desires is
a woman who does not ignore her own sensations.
"What am I feeling?"
"What makes me feel comfortable?"
She is a woman who is trying to properly feel these things.

And
a woman who has those sensations is also easily seen by men as
"a woman who values herself."

Therefore,how you express your desiresis
an important point that men look at besides the face.

-----------------------------------------------------------

Important point men look at besides the face ③ How to deal with your own emotions

The third point is how to deal with your own emotions.

If you are in love,
there are times when you will feel anxious.
There are times when you will feel lonely.
There are times when you will feel jealous.
There are times when anger will arise.

That in itself is not a bad thing.
It is because you have emotions that you can love someone.

But what matters is how you handle those emotions.

Actually, this is also where the feeling of
“I am someone who deserves to be cherished”
really comes out.

This is because when people feel that they are
“someone who deserves to be cherished,”
they are more likely to feel secure,
thinking, “It’s not like I’m going to be hated,” even when emotions arise.

Conversely,
if the feeling of
“I might not be loved”
or “I might be abandoned”
is strong,
the moment anxiety or loneliness appears, your nerves easily enter danger mode.

For example,
you might think, “Have you lost interest?” just because a reply is a little late.
You might feel anxious, thinking, “Did I do something?” just because the other person’s attitude is slightly different.

This is because the system in your body
that senses danger is reacting.

Your amygdala reacts, your sympathetic nervous system becomes dominant,
and you end up perceiving even small delays in LINE messages
or slight differences in facial expressions
as signs of danger.

As a result,
・You end up sending follow-up messages.
・You end up blaming the other person.
・You end up testing them.
These things become more likely to happen.

And men look at this:
When emotions arise, does this woman throw them all at me?
Or
does she take a moment to process them herself and try to communicate them calmly?

This is what they look at.

Of course,
this doesn't mean you have to be perfectly calm all the time.
When you are anxious, it is okay to say you are anxious.
When you are lonely, it is okay to say you are lonely.

But there is a difference between throwing it at them, saying, “Why don’t you understand!”
and saying,

“I was feeling a little anxious. That’s why I feel relieved when we can talk properly,”
the
atmosphere the man receives is completely different.

The former
is likely to trigger a defensive reaction in the man.

The latter
is likely to trigger a feeling in the man of
“I want to make this person feel secure.”

This is the big difference.

In other words,
depending on how you handle your own emotions,
the man you are with may feel a sense of security, or conversely,
the relationship may become
tension instead of security.

Therefore,
when a woman manages her emotions and
is able to put herself in a slightly better state,
that state significantly influences the man as well.

In other words, how you handle your own emotions
is not just for your own sake,
but it means you are creating
the "vibe between the two of you."

That is why
how you handle your emotions
is a key point that men look at quite closely, beyond just your face.

------------------------------------------------------------

What you should start doing today

Having heard this far,
some of you might be thinking,
"So, what should I actually do?"

To put the answer very simply,
"I am a person who deserves to be cherished"is the feeling that you need to
gradually cultivate.

This is because the three things I talked about today
all connect to that.

1. Reactions.
2. How to express your wishes.
3. How to handle your emotions.

This is not just a matter of technique.
At a more fundamental level,
"How I believe I deserve to be treated" shows up in everything.

So, conversely,
no matter how many relationship techniques you learn,
if deep in your heart,
the feeling that "I might not be loved"
or "I am someone who gets put last"
remains strong,

you are more likely to become anxious,
endure too much,
or resort to testing behaviors,
and you will easily fall back into painful relationship patterns unconsciously.

Therefore, what is important
is to cultivate the "power to return yourself to a good state."

Even if anxiety arises, you can calm down a little.
Even if you feel lonely, you can reassure yourself.
Even if your emotions are stirred, before dumping everything on your partner,
you can accept them yourself first.

And,
“What am I feeling?”
“What feels comfortable to me?”—make sure to properly feel these things.

As you repeat this, your nervous system will gradually
begin to learn that “I am okay.”

Then,
・Your aura will change.
・Your reactions will change.
・The way you express your desires will change.
・The way you handle your emotions will change.

And that change will also be conveyed to the man.

However, there is
something very important here.

That is,
programs at the nervous system level that have been cultivated over many years
do not change easily just by understanding them in your head,
that is what it means.

For example,
even if you try to think in your head that “I am worthy of being loved,”
your body and nervous system
might react by saying,
“No, I might get hurt,”
“I might be disliked again,”
“It’s dangerous to have expectations.”

That is why
relationship patterns
“often end up reverting even though you know better”
are prone to happening.

This is not because your willpower is weak.

It is because your brain and nervous system
are repeating survival patterns from the past.

That is why I
do not just convey knowledge, but
・Regulating the state of the nervous system itself
・Learning a sense of safety at the physical level
I value these things very highly.

In my counseling and courses as well,
・Breathing
・Physical sensations
・Sense of safety
・How to handle emotions

While using these things,
“I am a person who is cherished”
—I cultivate this feeling not just in the head, but
also at the nervous system level.

I value that.

What is truly important
is not forcing yourself to be liked,
but for you yourself to gradually
become able to live with the feeling that
“I am a person who is cherished.”

And, once that foundation is built,
more than your face,
a charm that makes men unable to leave you
will naturally begin to emerge.

--------------------------------------------------------

Summary

I have summarized today's content into five points.
1. Do you feel that you are a person who deserves to be treated with care, or
do you feel
that it is inevitable that you will be treated poorly?

This difference in perception shows up not just in your face, but in other areas as well.

2. The first point men look at besides the face is
reaction
Women who have a sense that they deserve to be treated with care
are more likely to accept affection honestly.
And it becomes easier to trigger a man's 'I want to make her happy' switch.

3. The second point men look at besides the face ishow you express your wishes

It is important to sprinkle 'I would be happy if it were like this' around your partner
when you are in a good state of mind.

4. The third point men look at besides the face ishow you deal with your own emotions

Do you dump all your anxiety and loneliness on them?
Or
can you accept them yourself first and then communicate them calmly?

Men are very sensitive to that atmosphere.

5. What is truly important is to gradually cultivate the feeling that
'I am a person who deserves to be treated with care' from a neurological level.

From there, more than just your face,
a charm that makes men unable to leave you will begin to emerge.

I sincerely wish you a happy love life.

If you would like, please write anything you are feeling right now
in the comments section.

Notice (Gift)

[Kizu-Koi 5 Major Benefits Gift]

🎁1. The reason Goro-san is doing 'Kizu-Koi'
🎁2. The 3 problems that sensitive women face
🎁3. The transformation route for sensitive women
🎁4. Kizu-Koi level diagnosis
🎁5. Kizu-Koi 3 major self-work exercises

I am giving the above 'Kizu-Koi Benefit Gift' to everyone for free.

Please register for LINE from here ↓
If you register for the official LINE and also subscribe to the newsletter, you can get the gift ✨

How was today's post?
If you felt that you want to continue
finding ways to face your sensitive self,
please 'like' and follow me.

Well then, let's meet again.

Love Therapist for Sensitive Women
Goro Tameike