The common trait of successful people is being 'self-first' and 'self-centered'

"I have to do my best for others."
"I have to meet the expectations of those around me."
—Are you tired from trying too hard like that?

Putting yourself last,
and before you know it, you are living a "life for someone else."
There are so many people like that.

I used to be like that too.
Thinking "I want to make others happy" or "I want to be a good person,"
there was a time when I kept pushing myself too hard.
But no matter how much I gave, my heart was never satisfied.

That is when I realized that
it is not a "spirit of self-sacrifice," but a "self-centered spirit" that is important.

This way of thinking, which sounds selfish at first glance,
is actually the "true secret to success"
that makes both business and relationships work well.

Is "acting for the sake of others" really correct?

There are phrases often cited as behavioral principles of successful people.

• A spirit of giving

• Supporting others

• Not telling lies

• Not blaming others

• Never forgetting gratitude

They are all wonderful, aren't they?
In short, it is the mindset of "let's act for the sake of others."

Of course, this is not wrong.
In business, at work, and in social interactions,
"acting for others" is very important.

But here, a misunderstanding tends to arise.

That is—
thinking that "acting for others = sacrificing yourself."

Actually, that is the pitfall.

Successful people are all "self-centered"

The spirit of giving is wonderful.
But for many, it doesn't last.

Why is that?

It is because those actions and thoughts are 'fake'.
The Japanese word for 'for others' (hito no tame) is written with the character for 'person' and 'sake'.
If you write it in kanji, it contains the character for 'fake' (nise).

In other words, 'fake giving' that isn't from the heart doesn't last.

For example,
'I don't really want to do this, but I'll endure it and help because I want to be seen as a good person.'
This will eventually lead to stress.

That is why what is important is to
pass things through the filter of 'for myself'.

• I am doing it because I want to do it

• I am doing it because it benefits me

This 'selfish' motivation is exactly what becomes the energy to keep actions going for a long time.
energy to sustain actions for a long time.

Take Horiemon (Takafumi Horie), for example.
He is active in many fields, including food and beverage, rockets, IT, and salons.

But the reason he does these things is simple.

Things started for his own sake
just happen to end up benefiting many people as a result.

Similarly, MB, who is famous in the apparel industry, is the same.

The initial driving force is, after all, 'because I like it'.
The more successful people are,the more 'self-first' they are.

Living 'self-first' makes you strong

Let me talk about myself for a moment.

I took six months of childcare leave after my daughter was born.
After that, I worked shorter hours, and eventually, I quit the company.

But I didn't do this
'for my daughter'.

It's all because 'I want to do it'.
It is self-centered, self-first behavior.

As a result, I was able to give a lot to my children,
and I have come to see their smiles by my side every day.

When I took paternity leave,
people said things like, 'You're a man,' or 'It's a waste of your career.'

But when you choose based on your own will,
you stop caring about that kind of noise.

When you live for 'yourself' rather than 'for others',
you stop being swayed by the evaluations of others.

Even if your annual income drops,
or your income becomes unstable,
you become resolute because 'it's the path I chose myself.'

'For yourself' is not selfish.

'For the sake of family,' 'for the sake of children,' 'for the sake of others'
—these are all noble ideas.

But if 'you' are absent from that,
you will eventually feel miserable somewhere along the way.

'What do I really want to do?'
'Am I happy doing that?'
'Am I holding the steering wheel of my own life?'

Just by asking these questions,
life becomes much simpler.

Living honestly with your own heart.
Doing what you want to do.

That, as a result,
is the way of life that makes the most people happy.

So, you too
can be a little 'self-centered'.

Let's put yourself at the center.
Things will surely go better that way.

Taakun

▓Summary

• 'For others' is noble, but self-sacrifice is unnecessary

• "I want to do it" creates genuine giving

• All successful people are selfish (self-first)

• You cannot be happy in a life where you are absent

• "For yourself" ends up being "for others"

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