What makes me happy as a coach is when we 'create a session together'.

When are you happiest as a coach?

This is a topic that often comes up in conversations with fellow coaches.

When the client has an 'aha' moment,
when the client starts taking action,
when the client achieves results,
when the client's expression brightens up.

These are the most common ones.

These are all changes on the client's side, aren't they?

Of course, I am also very happy when there is a change in the client.

Even if, unfortunately, a client only had a single session and we couldn't continue working together due to timing, pricing, or a lack of chemistry, it makes me very happy to see them active or overcoming the problems they raised as themes in their subsequent social media posts.

However, there is a moment I feel even happier than when the client changes.

That is when I can feel a sense of creating something together.

Today, I will talk about this in more detail.

Do solutions naturally emerge in a coaching session?

From the client's perspective, a coaching session might be thought of as,

If I just answer the coach's questions, a solution will naturally appear, right?

They might think that.

That is certainly true, but I believe the nuance of 'a solution naturally appears' differs depending on the enthusiasm or attitude behind it.

If you are not really in the mood and just leave it to the coach while answering questions, no solution will emerge at all.

Even if something that looks like a solution emerges, it is a facade and not something that can change the client in a true sense.

(In this sense, coaching sessions with my own children are difficult, but that is a topic for another time.)

If there is a genuine will to change behavior or solve a problem—in other words, the client's autonomy—the session will 'naturally lead to finding a solution.'

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Does the coach provide insights to the client?

Conversely, from the coach's perspective,

When the client has an 'aha!' moment
When the client starts taking action
When the client achieves results
When the client's expression brightens

are all things that make me happy, of course, but if I make those my purpose as a coach,

I have to make the client realize something,
I have to make them take action,
I have to make them get results,
Oh, I have to change the client's expression

which leads to a 'I have to make them do X' mindset on the coach's side.

That is no longer coaching, but rather manipulation, isn't it?

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The coach and client are in a 'collaborative relationship'

In a coaching session, the coach and client are in a 'collaborative relationship'.

'Collaboration' means that neither is above or below the other; it means creating something together.

In other words, in a coaching session, we stand on equal footing and search for answers together toward the same goal (the client's goal achievement or problem solving).

It is not the coach leading or educating,
nor is it the client depending on or begging for teachings.

I like the concept of a 'collaborative relationship'.

Regarding the theme chosen by the client during the session,

• we share the underlying information,

• Drawing out the client's thoughts and values regarding the theme,

• Digging deep into what is really going on,

• Finding the direction we want to aim for,

• Thinking about what to do next,

• And giving them a push by saying, 'We've decided this much, so let's do our best!'

This flow is what we create 'together.'

It doesn't work if either side is holding back, nor does it work if either side is being pushy.

It also doesn't work if either side is being overly dependent or harboring distrust.

The moment it becomes a space where we can walk in step, freely saying 'Exactly!' or 'That's great!', and talk constructively toward an answer, is truly a 'happy moment for me as a coach.'

In such times, a convinced answer, a bright expression, and new actions are
invariably included as a set.

That is why I want to have a 'collaborative relationship' with my clients.

A 'collaborative relationship' is not just during the session

This 'collaborative relationship'.

I believe it is not something that only activates between a coach and a client during a session.

For example,

• Not being able to concentrate on the session due to feeling unwell

• Actually having something else on your mind and not being fully engaged in the session

• The computer acting up and the audio not connecting properly... and so on

Various situations can occur on both the client's side and the coach's side.

However, a coach and a client are in a 'collaborative relationship'.

You should speak your mind without hesitation and make adjustments to aim for a better session environment.

Above all, the most important thing is to trust each other and feel safe enough to say anything.

I am always conscious of wanting to build this kind of relationship with my clients.

I have received a steady stream of session bookings starting from next week.
I am already looking forward to seeing what kind of session we can create 'together'!

Thank you for reading until the end today.
I hope this provides a hint for someone (^^)

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