When does the motivation switch turn on? Can it be turned on?

One of the things mothers want to know regarding middle school entrance exams is, "How can I turn on my child's motivation switch?"
I imagine you might also be wondering, "Does a motivation switch even exist in the first place?"

I felt the same way.
The reason I joined a coaching school and learned coaching was also based on the simple-minded idea that, "If I incorporate coaching into my conversations with my son, maybe I can just click and turn on Tsu-ta's motivation switch."

So, did my children's motivation switches turn on?
I would like to talk about that.

Was there a motivation switch?

To give you the conclusion first, my children did indeed have a motivation switch,
and it did turn on.

But it wasn't at the early stage that many of you might be expecting.

My eldest son Wan-ta's motivation switch

First, for my eldest son Wan-ta, it was January of his sixth-grade year.
That's right.
It was after he failed all the January schools he took to get used to the exam environment.

His first-choice school was the one he was going to take on February 1st.

He seemed to realize that "this is finally getting serious," and for the two weeks after failing the January schools, he was truly working "like his life depended on it."

Until then, he had been passive, asking, "What should I do next?" but
he finally began to work proactively.

His concentration when tackling problems, his seriousness when correcting his work, and his determination not to miss easy questions.

Those things were completely different from before.
He was like a different person.

From there, he spent his days focusing on past exam papers.
I remember that, day after day, he solved the past exam papers for the school he was taking on February 1st over and over again.

Thanks to that, he was safely accepted on February 1st.

My second son Tsu-ta's motivation switch

And then, my second son Tsu-ta.

The exams began with the January schools and the February schools.
He kept taking them on the 1st, 2nd, 3rd... but he couldn't easily get an acceptance, and
in the end, it dragged on until February 5th.

It was only at that stage that his "motivation switch" finally turned on.

Even after February 5th, the entrance exams continued, but the question papers he brought home, especially the math ones, were completely different from those of the schools he had taken exams for until then.

The margins of the question papers from schools he took exams for before February 5th.
Well, to some extent, you could see traces of effort where he had worked with his hands and tried to reach the answer.

However, the ones from after February 5th.

They were pitch black, with almost no margins left, showing traces of him repeatedly checking his work over and over, struggling, worrying, and suffering over problems he couldn't solve.

From those question papers, the feeling of "I really want to pass!" came across vividly.

"The switch has finally turned on."
That was the moment I was convinced of it.

As a result, he successfully passed, and he is now happily attending that school.

How can you press the motivation switch?

What I feel from watching my sons is

///////////////////
there are no magic words to press the motivation switch
\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\

that is.

Throughout the time they decided to take the exams and were attending cram school, I said countless things to my two sons,
"You're working hard!", "It's okay", "I want you to move up a class",
"If you keep going like this, your class will drop", "That's amazing!"...
I used both positive and negative words.

However, in the end, my children's "motivation switches" didn't turn on until after January.

No matter how much parents try to pressure, encourage, or threaten them from this direction or that direction with words or attitudes, the "motivation switch" does not activate, and in fact, it often has the opposite effect.

So when does a child's motivation switch activate?

It is the moment when the child themselves faces the exam or the problem in front of them and thinks, "I want to solve this" or "I want to pass."

Therefore, when and at what timing that happens depends on the child.

What can parents do to activate the "motivation switch"?

So, is there nothing parents can do to help a child activate their "motivation switch"?

I believe it does exist.

For example, so that the child themselves can perceive exams or the problems in front of them as "their own business",

What good things will happen if you do this?
What can you achieve?
What kind of future is waiting?
How do you think you will feel at that time?
What do you think you can do for that right now?

Let's try asking questions that provide such realizations.

Plant many seeds of realization in the child, such as "If such a future is waiting, I'll try my best,"
or "It seems better to do this."

It is steady work, but I think that is the way others can help them.

Also, from the perspective of brain science, it is known that the "motivation switch" activates when one thinks "This is fun!"

When does your child look like they are enjoying themselves while facing their studies?
Are they focused?

When sharing goals or time with everyone?
When working hard for someone else's sake?
When their own goals have become clear?
When they feel attracted to the content they are working on itself?

Knowing each child's individual qualities and engaging with them or speaking to them in a way that suits those qualities is one approach.

At the time, Tsuta was a child type with a strong "for someone else's sake" quality.

So, I made an effort to share my positive feelings by saying, "You're working hard! It makes me happy to see you like that."
When I did that, he would sit at his desk looking happy.

Summary

Today, I wrote about children's "motivation switches."

I would be happy if this could be of any help to anyone (*^^*)

I hold courses where I teach methods for speaking to children and personality type diagnostics ("Brain Tendency Diagnosis").

You can also find courses here that incorporate plenty of our family's experiences.