I'm unusually tired!

My body has felt heavy since this morning...

Hmm. I'm not feeling quite right...

Ah, something is clearly off!

I've felt that my body has been different lately compared to usual.

Something just isn't quite right...

I value these moments of realization✨

This weekend, I'm going to do absolutely nothing.

I've chosen to do absolutely nothing, so that's fine.

So, I don't have any stress.

Since I have to get up early for work, I haven't been going out on weekdays either.

I'm just moving in energy-saving mode in my daily life.

Until last month, I was planning to resume training in March.

I was spending my time incorporating my usual sense of comfort and healing.

For two weeks in a row, I haven't been able to enjoy comfort in either my body or my mind.

I'm not really feeling comfortable...

This is how I feel inside!

However, I'm just going about my daily life as usual
(though, I'm really not doing anything at all. I feel bad for mothers with small children)

It's not that I'm terribly busy,

or that I'm working hard,

if anything, I'm not moving at all.

Feeling stressed,

or feeling tired,

since I'm spending my time freely,

it's hard to think about things like that...

Since I can't find any reason at all to feel tired or stressed,

I was wondering about it myself, hmm...

My current activity level is about half of what it was just a few years ago.

The aging and mental changes that happen from your 40s are incredible!

Even though I'm living such a relaxed life,

where could there be any reason to be this tired????

That's what I thought when I looked back on it.

My 4-day work week (5 hours a day) happened to turn into a 5-day work week for two weeks in a row.

My shifts at one of the elementary schools where I work have increased,

and I knew that when I go to that school, I have to be extremely attentive,

but,

this became an opportunity for me to realize

that I had been more on edge than I thought.

Even though it was only two extra days,

I felt like I had been incredibly alert and mentally drained,

and when I got home on Friday, I was completely wiped out,

and even after doing my nails, having tea with friends, a light drink, and chatting,

I haven't returned to my usual self.

Something feels off, I haven't regained my sense of comfort!

Ahhh

I guess I'm tired.

At this point

finally

I'm able to feel this way (lol)

I'm able to move around without much trouble

and since I can do things unconsciously without trying too hard,

it's hard to feel like I'm working hard!

I don't know how much energy I'm consuming (lol)

Since I'm not trying hard,

it's only through

my body feeling strange that I finally notice!

Which means,

I've exceeded my capacity! Please notice!

That's what it is.

I've learned my lesson many times over because of this, but...

Well, even so, I've become able to notice it sooner!

To others, it's just two days, just a small increase.

On top of that, my daily life isn't busy and is free.

Even just this small change in things

has a huge impact,

I realize...

I could cry at how incapable I am,

but at this age, you start to be able to accept it!

I realize that I am affected by this small change.

But regarding that, it hasn't been understood until now,

and I've been under the illusion that I've been managing it myself,

not being understood,

and because I try hard myself, I've been trying to make others' evaluations match my own,

or something like that.

Yes! I'm using a lot of energy for even small changes.

I can do it without trying too hard, so it doesn't feel like I'm working hard.

But in reality, the impact is huge!

Even though I'm not trying hard, the damage is significant, and I can't quite adjust the misalignment.

I wonder if there are others who have had similar experiences? (lol)

To think that just two extra days would leave me this exhausted...

I'm disappointed in myself for how easily I'm influenced by my environment (lol).

Even with this level of fatigue, once it exceeds a certain point, it takes effort to recover.

Since I know that,

fine-tuning my mind and body is important!

Thinking about what I should use to adjust myself right now,

even while feeling the heaviness in my mind and body,

I'm making thinking about that a little pleasure in itself.

I plan to fully heal myself during spring break.

Until then, let's just focus on keeping a steady daily rhythm!

It's good to know your own physical strength, endurance, and recovery capacity, isn't it?💕😊