Being Considerate vs. Not Being Considerate

I don't really like it when people are overly considerate toward me.

It's fine when the roles are clearly defined, but otherwise,

when someone is overly considerate,
I feel like I have to be considerate in return.

Making the other person feel like they have to be considerate,
makes me feel somewhat sorry...

Just as I get nervous
when the other person is nervous,

if the other person is being considerate,
I end up being considerate too.

Therefore, the stance I take
when being considerate toward others is:

Don't make the other person feel like they have to be considerate!✨

That is what it is!😊

I believe that being able to be yourself without having to be overly considerate is the state where you are most relaxed and comfortable,

so maintaining an atmosphere where the other person doesn't feel the need to be overly considerate is...

What I consider to be being considerate of others!

I am also writing about my own communication style😊

Many people, for the sake of others,
clearly show their consideration as a form of kindness.

That is also a form of kindness and thoughtfulness, and it is a wonderful thing✨

That is also providing comfort💕

Yes! I tend to think of thoughtfulness as a kind of service😄

When I wrote about empathy and thoughtfulness, I also wrote about things like being too thoughtful!

Being considerate is,

in essence, I think it is self-preservation!

Being considerate is really self-centered, isn't it!

That is what I think...😊

Being considerate and
being thoughtful
is really just doing what you want to do from your own subjective perspective!

You are thinking of the other person and considering them, but
I also think it's self-centered, as you're just watching their reactions to gauge your own standing.😊

I suppose it comes down to whose perspective you're looking from...

I
believe that making someone feel awkward or forcing them to use unnecessary effort
becomes a burden to them, so

not making the other person feel like they have to be considerate
is what I think is truly for the other person.

Precisely because I care about the other person,
I am considerate of them, and

I maintain an attitude of not making them feel like they have to be considerate.😊

This is my idea of

a person-centered approach!✨

Even so... sometimes I make people feel like they have to be considerate without even realizing it (lol)

Being natural
is for that reason too!✨🤗

(I believe it's a good thing for both myself and the other person)

I also wrote about this in the article above, 'About My Communication'!

Behaving in a way that doesn't require others to be considerate is, to be precise, acting with consideration for the other person by ensuring they don't feel the need to be considerate of you.

Of course, I do act with consideration, but since these are actions I take because I think they are for the best, I wonder if it could be described as feeling self-centered...

It's not that I don't show consideration, but perhaps it's more about observing the other person~

Basically, I try to behave in a way that doesn't make the other person feel like they have to be considerate of me,

That's why I want to act naturally, smartly, and gracefully💕😊

There is a phrase I recorded in my study materials when I was learning psychology.

A "person-centered" individual is someone who "does not make others feel they need to be considerate" and is full of "consideration."
They are open-minded and easygoing, yet humble.

When I encountered these words, I felt as if my own way of thinking had been validated,
and I was so happy!☺️
So I really was able to have a person-centered mindset✨
And this kind of person is exactly the ideal I aspire to be💖

As for my self-evaluation:

Not making others feel they need to be considerate ← ◎
Consideration ← ○
Open-minded ← ◎
Easygoing ← ○
Humble ← △ 😂

I evaluated myself without holding back,
but maybe I could have rated myself even higher (lol)
(Even if others evaluate me differently, that's fine)
For me, it's a job well done✨👏 Praise myself✨

Self-centered
Person-centered

There are many ways of thinking, but
I want to be someone who is natural, flat, neutral, and self-congruent✨
That's the kind of person I want to be💕😊

It's nice to be thoughtful, isn't it?
But 'being considerate' feels a bit different, doesn't it!

Because you are being considerate toward the other person,
you might also feel like the other person is being considerate too!

I think it depends on your own state of mind and your position.😊

What kind of thoughts does everyone have?✨

~Just some random thoughts~

・・Thank you for reading・・