My daughters give me presentations!

When my daughters have something they want to do,

I ask them to give me a presentation!

The reason is that
it becomes an independent activity where they can
research,
compare,
and gain a deep understanding of the subject itself.

In order to get parental approval, it becomes a task of thinking about logical explanation, presentation, and negotiation, which means speaking in a way that gets through to the other person.

Because of this, they perform tasks like organizing the content, summarizing it,
and explaining it in a way that is easy for the other person to understand.

Since they can engage in this process, I intentionally encourage them to do so!
(Especially from junior high school onwards, during adolescence, I encourage them to do things like this.)

The method is,

I understand what you want to do!
But, Mom doesn't know anything about the content, so I don't really understand it from your current explanation.
Could you research it a bit more and explain it to me so I can understand?
And, if you want me to understand, could you explain it to Mom one more time so that your feelings come across?
Mom can't organize and understand things in her head unless they are explained slowly and clearly, so I'll be able to understand if you explain it that way.
It's okay to just do as much as you can, so could you try doing that for me?

Like this, I act as if I can't keep up with the current times! My mental comprehension is also declining!
I make it feel like a request: 'Could you explain it clearly so that it gets through to a mother like me?' 😅

I really can't understand it (lol).
It's easier to understand if you organize the story!

Adolescent children tend to let their feelings get ahead of them, so...
they might start talking suddenly, on a whim, or talk one-sidedly...

When that happens, even if I want to understand them,
unnecessary, unwanted emotions well up, leading to a sloppy response... and we clash (lol).
It could end up hurting them unnecessarily, or they might think I don't understand them.

So, I pause for a moment, grasp the situation up to that point,
and set up an opportunity to take the time to properly organize and talk again!

But!

Because teenagers hate anything that's a hassle

Huh? Well, fine then!! (huff)

That's what happens most of the time (lol)

I also think, 'Oh, it's just that kind of thing, so never mind' (lol)

Only when they are truly serious do they try to get things right here😊
Or, while checking their level of seriousness, if it seems like they are serious,
I might ask them, 'So, what are you going to do about that?'

In my eldest daughter's case,
it was 'I want to go on a long-term study abroad program in my first year of high school when I'm in 8th grade!'

Since elementary school, she had a wish to do a short-term study abroad program in junior high.
In 8th grade, due to puberty, she was dealing with trouble with friends, thoughts about herself, her future, and the meaning of life,
her head was a mess and she was unstable. She was very rebellious—the definition of puberty!
When I asked her about the short-term study abroad program in junior high,
she started saying that short-term programs are meaningless and she wanted to do a long-term study abroad program in high school...

W-w-what did you say???

I don't know anything about long-term study abroad—how much would that even cost?
You won't be able to study for a year, so what about your academic performance? What are you thinking about university entrance exams?
Huh~~~~~! Isn't that too sudden??

After that, in the spring between 8th and 9th grade, she researched study abroad programs extensively, asked me to go to information sessions with her, and worked really hard! Preparing for it, she made a plan, took selection exams and interviews in 9th grade, and worked toward her goal of a long-term study abroad program starting in the summer of her first year of high school!
I thought that the goal she set for herself was, in a way, a path to outgrowing puberty,
and I thought it would build her confidence!✨
She flew off for her long-term study abroad program in the summer of her first year of high school!
I respect the courage of a girl who, from the end of 8th grade, aimed for self-actualization and decided on her own path✨
It's not just my eldest daughter; there are many children who decide on their own challenges and fly off in 9th grade!
I really think everyone is amazing!

Since then, my eldest daughter has started giving me presentations on choosing cram schools, deciding on universities, and various other things! Her university entrance exam was also a presentation (lol)

And the reason I decided to write this article this time is,about my second daughter!

My second daughter also really wanted a new iPad (she is currently using a 32GB one)
and she gave me a presentation✨

When I first heard it, she suddenly started talking about her request at length, without any context,
and she rambled on with a disorganized explanation...

W-wait a minute!
I understand your feelings, and I understand what you want to say,
but if you continue like this, it might be perceived as being selfish...
Could you organize your thoughts and let me listen to you again another day?

My sensitive second daughter said, 'Why won't you listen to me! Why don't you understand me!'
'I don't want to wait! If I don't do it now, I'll forget what I want to say!' (crying)

(Oh boy...) I understand the gist of it, so to make sure you don't forget,
why don't you try organizing it once so you can explain the reasons and how you feel in an orderly way? (Phew, this is exhausting...)

She got intensely angry and sad (she huffed and said, 'Fine, whatever!' and locked herself in her room)
Well, I thought, 'I guess that's that,' and forgot about it!

But after she entered high school, her level of seriousness about the purchase really increased!

They came up to me and said, "I want to talk about that new iPad we were discussing earlier..."
"I've summarized it, so I'll send it to you!"

(Wait, not verbally? A transcript? (lol) Nice one. That's so like my second daughter!)

And this is it ↓

[What I'll actually use the device for]

Receiving and submitting assignments.
Handouts and such will also be sent to the device.
Work for committees and club activities.

-------------------‐

[Price]

iPad Air
・64GB → 62,800 yen (excluding tax)
・256GB → 79,800 yen (excluding tax)

iPad Pro
・128GB → 84,800 yen (excluding tax)
・256GB → 95,800 yen (excluding tax)

Apple Pencil (2nd generation)
14,500 yen at the Apple Store (excluding tax)

(iPad Air screen protector 1,891 yen on Amazon)
(Still deciding on a keyboard, there are so many)

-------------------‐

[Downsides]

MacBook Air
・Heavy. Hard to carry around.
→ I use it at home, so I can't just leave it there. Student bags are small.

・Big. Takes up space.
→ It takes up most of the desk. Wouldn't I be unable to take notes?

iPad (7th generation)
・The very precious 32GB
→ Honestly, it's on the low side for drawing. The image quality isn't great either. And general settings take up 11GB.

-------------------‐

[Benefits]

・It's iPad-sized, so it's easy to carry.
・Doesn't take up much space.
・With more capacity, I can do more things. It will last a long time (can use it through university).
・Can be used as both a PC and an iPad.
(・It's also easy to draw on.)

-------------------‐

It turns out the Air is enough, rather than the Pro.
However, the 256GB model can be used for a longer period than the 64GB one, and it allows for more things to be done.
A MacBook Air for home use and an iPad Air for school (including university) is quite a viable option. Well, I suppose it depends on which university she goes to. Either way, it can be used for a long time.

If she buys it,
she can sell her iPad (7th generation).
She can sell her bass.
She can also sell her guitar, but since it's used-on-used, it will probably be cheap.

↑↑↑

A mother trying to make her pay for it herself (lol)
Buying what she likes
And expensive items at that
She already has a Mac and an iPad
She feels both are lacking for her own needs
Even though they aren't unusable, she wants to buy something because she wants what she desires
In that case, I tell her: Why don't you try buying it with your own money!
It's something she wants, which she recognizes as just her own desire
She does the reconciling of that herself
She thinks about how to use her own money for that purpose.

The money she saved from New Year's gifts is hers to do with as she pleases, whether she saves it or spends it!
Even if it becomes an expense, she seems to be thinking about
how much she can recover in a year from birthdays, Christmas, and New Year's gifts (Not bad~✨)
It's a high price, but calculating that she can recover about 70% in a year,
she gathered her courage and decided to make the purchase!!✨

My second daughter has also bought her guitar, bass, and keyboard with her own money, but
she really felt the magnitude of the difference in price!

This time, she researched it herself, compared options, and thought about which content would be best,
the effort she put into organizing it, and the income and expenditure calculations regarding money
tasks that involve her own gains and losses
It's just a matter of deciding one thing, but
she is doing various reconciliation work within herself!

The experience she gained from this incident was extremely valuable,
and I felt so much joy at her great growth✨😊

Thinking about her own standards versus society's standards
Researching, comparing, examining, and understanding for herself
Organizing, summarizing, and building a logical argument
Thinking of an explanation that the other party can understand

Incorporating such practice into daily life
Precisely because it's the teenage years where they find everything troublesome,
I make her do these things for the things she is interested in

I've been doing this since she was little, though.
Watching the process while matching it to her developmental stage
That's my parenting philosophy (lol)

Now that she's in high school, she's chopped off the hair she had been growing out during middle school!
She did a hair donation,
started at a cram school, created a personal history, and began reflecting on herself
And then, this presentation for the iPad purchase

I feel something
Things are gradually changing within her
I can feel that kind of thing

The beginning of that spring in their first year of high school...🌸