20250926 'The Depths of Yugen'

Lying down again today
awake or asleep
dozing off
it feels like a dream
and yet it does not
lying down
watching something
is it what is before my eyes
or is it in a dream
worrying about someone
calling out to someone
wondering if perhaps I am being called
neither hot nor cold
a sharp little prick
popping a balloon with a snap

Watching the usual scenery
thinking that there is a difference
returning to myself
and letting go again
fully receiving the flowing landscape
filling up as if satisfied
after a while it is eighty percent full
the remaining margin is still left
swaying and fluttering
dozing off
nodding off
letting it move slowly
the four directions of the existence I entrusted
it is fine to be anywhere
and then it will likely fill us up

I do not need any of it
but it would be inconvenient if it were not there
giving it appropriately
and just improvising a little
if it is not there then it is not there
perhaps I too do not need to be there
if necessary I will obtain something
and again with my usual self
swapping with someone else's self
knocking on the depths of Yugen
filling the exposed air
stuffing it with not caring
gently being there
with a single mat's worth of sending
I will likely gain enough to cover the time