Psychology for those tired of 'the daily routine starting again'
Hello. I am Shingo, a psychologist at the Shin-Shin Psychology Research Institute.
When long weekends, the end of the year, or the New Year holidays come to an end. Have you ever felt a heavy, sinking sensation in the pit of your stomach the moment you look at the calendar and see work, school, chores, and appointments lined up, thinking, 'Is the daily routine starting again...?'
It is not that there has been any major, noticeable trouble. It is not that your work, family, or relationships have definitively broken down. In fact, from the perspective of those around you, you might even be in a state of 'doing just fine'.
Even so, returning to the daily routine itself feels unbearably exhausting. The thought of morning coming is depressing, and your body feels as heavy as lead.
This feeling is by no means laziness, self-indulgence, or a lack of willpower. From a psychological perspective, it is a very natural, and in fact,a mental reaction that is more likely to occur in people who have been working hard.
In this article, I will carefully unravel the mental mechanisms behind why we get tired of 'the daily routine starting again,' and explain, in gentle terms, ways of thinking and methods for organizing your mind to gradually feel more at ease.
1. Why is 'returning to the daily routine' so painful?
First, I want you to know that in many cases,it is not the daily routine itself that is painful. What is truly causing the pain lies in 'the way you use your mind to try to fit into the daily routine'.
In our daily lives, we unconsciously enter the following modes.
I have to do things properly
I have to meet expectations
I must not cause trouble for others
I have to keep moving without resting
I have to prioritize my role over my mood
This 'must-do mode' is necessary for living in society. However, at the same time, it is a state that consumes a significant amount of energy for the mind.
When this mode continues for a long time, the mind gradually becomes exhausted without you even realizing it.
During holidays, this tension temporarily eases. This is because you are not chased by time, you distance yourself slightly from evaluations and roles, and you can return to a state closer to your 'true self'.
That is precisely why, at the moment of returning to the daily routine, a strong sense of fatigue and resistance arises as you take on those roles once again.
2. The true nature of 'lacking motivation' is a mental defense mechanism
The moment you think, 'The daily routine is starting again,' your body feels heavy, your mind won't work, and you feel no energy. Some people might even feel like crying for no reason.
We tend to judge these states as 'lacking motivation,' 'being lazy,' or 'failing to switch gears'.
However, from a psychological perspective, this is a state where your mental brakes are working normally.
When your mind feels like it is about to be pushed too far, it tries to protect you by sending out signs such as:
intense fatigue
lethargy
a feeling of wanting to escape or rest
it tries to protect you by sending out signs like these.
In other words, feeling that 'daily life is exhausting' or 'I can't get moving' is not proof that your mind is weak. It is also proof that your mind is desperately applying the brakes so that you do not push yourself any further.
3. The thought of 'I have to go back' makes the mind suffer even more
When daily life begins, many people unconsciously think like this:
'I have to go back to my original life properly' 'I must be able to do things as usual' 'I have to return to the person I was before the break'
This idea of 'returning to how things were' actually drives the mind further into a corner.
A person's mind inevitably changes little by little every time they go through a break or an event. Sometimes fatigue remains, values may waver, or a feeling of pausing and wondering, 'Is it okay to stay like this?' may arise.
Even so, if you try to 'act as if nothing happened and move as you did before,' the gap between your mind and your actions grows. In psychology, it is known that if this gap continues, it easily manifests as discomfort, irritation, self-denial, and depressive feelings.
4. The perspective of 'readjusting' rather than 'returning' to daily life
Here is a perspective I would like you to adopt.
Daily life is not something you return to, but something you readjust each time.
What is needed after a break is not to suddenly start running at 100% capacity.
It is okay to slow down your pace
It does not have to be the same rhythm as before
It is okay to have days where you cannot do things
It is okay to accept that things are tough
By allowing yourself this kind of breathing room, your mind will gradually adjust to reality and move closer to a state where you can function again.
For example,
“70% is enough for today,” “Just showing up to work (or school) is a success today,” “Doing the bare minimum is OK today.”
By doing things like temporarily lowering your standards for yourself, the burden on your mind will change significantly.
5. People who find 'daily life difficult' are also highly sensitive
People who find it difficult to return to their daily routine are also those who unconsciously and sensitively pick up on changes in their environment and the atmosphere.
Easily noticing the expectations and atmosphere of those around you
High ability to read the room
Tendency to prioritize others or the situation over your own feelings
While these traits are often praised in society as being 'thoughtful' or 'diligent,' they also consume more mental energy than average.
Instead of blaming yourself by asking,
“Why am I so easily exhausted?”
understanding that
“I am easily exhausted because I have been feeling so much”is the first step toward recovery.
6. Gentle psychological self-care you can start today
Finally, here are some low-pressure self-care tips you can use when you are tired of 'the daily routine starting again'.
1. Don't try to 'pump yourself up' in the morning
If you try to force yourself to move with sheer willpower, you are more likely to experience a backlash later. In the morning, it is enough to have a mindset of 'it's a lucky bonus if I can move' or 'it's a great job if I can just get up'.
2. Find just one thing you 'accomplished' at the end of the day
It doesn't have to be a major achievement or a big effort. 'I woke up properly,' 'I went outside,' 'I finished the day'—even just those things are a wonderful step forward.
3. Do not deny yourself for thinking, 'Here we go again with the daily routine...'
That murmur is your honest, true feeling. Instead of trying to erase it, try saying to yourself in your heart, 'You've worked so hard up until now to feel that way.'
Summary
Feeling tired when you think, 'The daily routine is starting again,' does not mean you are weak, nor does it mean you are lazy.
It is a psychological reaction that occurs precisely in people who have lived their lives so far with a sense of responsibility and sincerity.
Please do not blame yourself for feeling a little tired every time you return to your daily routine.
Daily life is not something to be handled perfectly; it is something to 're-engage with' while consulting your state of mind each time.
I hope that you feel just a little bit more at ease today than you did yesterday. I would be happy if you could use this psychology as a hint for that.
At Shinshin Psychology Research Institute, we will continue to support your mental health this year as well.
