Preparing for the 4th Embryo Transfer

It's been a while. 😭

Last month, my 4th embryo transfer was canceled,
and although two follicles grew, the timing for ovulation didn't align,
so we tried naturally, but my period came.
For the first time in a while, I cried my eyes out alone in the bathroom...

Every time my period comes, I'm reminded that I still want a future with children,
and it makes my heart ache.

As I approach my birthday in May,
looking back at the fact that I couldn't have a transfer this past year,
there were days when I felt really down.

Thinking that I couldn't go on like this,
I decided to turn over a new leaf and started going to acupuncture to get my body in shape.

Even though my stomach felt warm, I was bothered by the fact that my hands and feet were always cold.

I had been to several acupuncture clinics before, but honestly, I didn't feel any significant effects.

Even so,
for the 4th embryo transfer,
I really wanted things to go well this time,
so I talked to my husband and decided to start going to an acupuncture clinic seriously.

I was told that while my hands and feet are cold,
I don't have the type of body that is cold all over,
but rather a state where heat is trapped in my upper body and the circulation of 'qi' is stagnant.
Because of that,

I received acupuncture, moxibustion, and cupping treatments.
Unlike the acupuncture I had experienced before,

by the time I went home, my whole body felt warm and glowing,
and I felt that my shoulder area, in particular, had become lighter.
That night, I was able to sleep soundly for the first time in a while.



The next day, I felt as if my body had become lighter.I ended up going twice a week until the transfer.

Honestly, it's a burden on our household budget, but

I had a strong feeling that I wanted to believe in the acupuncture that made me feel a change in my body.
In contrast to me, who acts immediately when I want to do something,
my husband is the type who calmly looks at the situation and makes judgments.

"You should think of acupuncture only as a supplement. It costs money, so you should just think of it as something to try this time," he said.



His words took me by surprise.

Even though I knew I shouldn't rely too much on acupuncture,I realized that I had been clinging to it somewhere in my heart.

I think my husband said that because he imagined me cornering myself by thinking, "I did acupuncture, yet..." if the results didn't come.


While cherishing the feeling that I want to go because I felt a change,

I want to prepare my body for the 4th embryo transfer without expecting too much from acupuncture, while keeping in mind that it is just a tool to use.

I have some anxiety now, butI still want to cherish the fact that I am trying to move forward.