Treating yourself like a VIP.
Money talk again!
I don't even know what number this is! Haha
I have
always
thought that spending money was bad, and
that is
something I inherited from my parents, but
ever since I started earning my own money,
that belief became even stronger.
So,
I rarely had money spent on me by others.
But,
even though I had scholarships or loans at times,
I never had to rely on consumer finance.
Surprisingly, I've never really been in financial trouble.
Besides earning it myself,
money would come in one way or another,
like other people's money.
I haven't been able to save,
but I've never been
in such financial trouble that I couldn't live.
But,
I'll say it again,
even though I've never been in financial trouble,
I couldn't spend money,
and I've given up on many things
because of money.
Saying it's too expensive, so I can't.
I've
given up on things I was interested in
or wanted.I've given up on them.
As a result,
there are some things I didn't need to buy, though.
And you know,
there was something I was interested in this time too.
While thinking,
what should I do?
I didn't choose it.
Then,
it stayed in my heart
for a long, long time.
I envy people who can easily purchase it (or so it seems),
and even though I think, 'That's nice,'
I didn't choose it because I don't have extra money,
I don't have the luxury of money,
or rather,
that thought stayed in my heart for a long time.
But, I knew that if I chose it,
I would grow one step further.
Even while thinking that
I couldn't make the decision.
I had various people
push me to do it
(or rather, I made them say it)
It took quite a while
before I finally made the purchase.
Once I had decided,
my heart was pounding and racing,
my stomach hurt,
and I was sweating profusely.
Oh my god,
I've actually done it!
That's what I thought.
This
oh my god is
there's no turning back now,
I can't play the tragic heroine anymore,
I just have to do it!
kind of
oh my god.
And
when I transferred the money and saw the remaining balance
Wow, it's gone down
I honestly thought.
After all,
the amount remaining had changed.
The numbers had decreased.
You'd think it's gone down, right?
(You wouldn't think it's gone up, haha)
But,
ever since I made the transfer,
the palpitations have stopped,
and I feel steady and composed.
With confidence.
And you know,
this is surprising, but
once I paid for it,
I stopped thinking it was expensive.
I can't quite put into words
what this change in my heart is.
Someone who bought the same thing
It's practically free!
they said,
No way!
I paid money for it!!
I thought that,
but I feel like I'm starting to understand what they meant.
(Though I don't think it's free, haha)
Being the kind of person who can pay for it,
not suppressing my true feelings because of money, not giving up,
it's like I paid money
for that challenge, for that resolve.
Since I've come to think that way,
maybe it really is practically free.
(Maybe.)
And you know,
the way people around me treat me has changed a bit too,
especially from my husband.
Today, after my husband took our fussy son to the pediatrician because he wasn't feeling well, he looked after him at home, even though it must have been tough,
(Taking care of a fussy baby is hard!)
When I got home from work,
・You don't have to cook today.
・I'll go buy something, what would you like??
he said,
So, when I jokingly said, "Beer 🍺",
he actually went to the supermarket to buy it,
prepared dinner for the adults and food for our son,
and gave me the best hospitality ever!!
Hey, isn't that amazing??
He had been dealing with our fussy son for a long time,
and he must have been exhausted, right?
While I was in the bath,
my son drank his milk and fell asleep,
and I came home today
and didn't do any housework at all!
My husband has always been kind, but
I feel his kindness even more now!
I was truly treated like a VIP!
Thank you so much!!
Now then,
It doesn't end here for
me.
Yes, this time too
I still haven't told my husband 🤣 lol
After all, to my husband, it's
a shocking amount,
so I haven't been able to say it.
When will I tell my husband...
And what will his reaction be...