Retrospective Tarot [11/6-11/14] 10 days at once? I let it pile up too much, I wonder if I can remember it all?
Since I haven't looked back since 11/6, I guess I'll try to roughly look back as far as I can remember. Today is 11/15, so it's been about 10 days.
This is the article from when I did the one-month reading.
And, since it's hard to understand without images, I'll paste the
list of cards drawn,
and the handwritten notes I converted into text
as well.
November Fortune
11/6 Thu [Transformation (Upright)]
・Did my first 3-choice reading
・It's been a while since I took a weekday off, it feels fresh
・The excitement of wondering what will happen from here on out
・I was finally able to throw away the bulky trash that I couldn't get rid of before because our schedules didn't match✨
Major Arcana XIII is generally Death. In the Starchild Tarot, it is Transformation. I suppose it's a fitting day to be at the boundary where something changes significantly from what it was before.
11/7 Fri [Sun (Reversed)]
・I was excited because I had plans to go see a kitten the next day, 11/8
・I think work went well and I spent the day calmly
・I feel like my husband and I were debating the kitten's name the day before too
I didn't record anything for this day, so my memory is quite hazy, but since I think I was full of hope and excitement, it should have been the "Sun 🌞", but for some reason, it was reversed. However, looking back on it now, since it's been confirmed that we can't keep the cat, maybe it was reversed to include that future. When I think about it that way, it makes sense.
11/8 Sat [Sword 5 (Reversed)]
・I was motivated and made sweet potatoes from the morning
・Went to see the kitten with my husband
・Cute, cute, cute😍 When can we pick it up? I want to take it home right away💕
・Promised to come pick it up next Saturday, headed to the home center with excitement, and bought all the necessary items at once✨
・Something's wrong... the side of my mouth is tingling, my throat feels weird too... I might be having a cat allergy...
・What should I do, what should I do, what should I do
・After much inner conflict, I confessed and consulted with my husband
・My husband advised me, "Why don't you wait and see until tomorrow to decide?", so I held off on making a decision that day
・I kept feeling anxious and conflicted all night... what should I do, what should I do, what should I do
I wrote about it in an article, but this day went from heaven to hell. "Sword 5" is a card about taking something by force. If it's reversed, it's a card about having something important taken away from you instead. The important thing that day was the cat, and perhaps it was also the dream that my husband and I had of keeping a cat. Because of a lack of preparation (like not having an allergy test), it led to a result where we couldn't have it and felt sad. The cards predicted it perfectly... Actually, I hadn't reached a conclusion that day, but looking at it from the future, it's correct, isn't it...
11/9 [The Hierophant (Reversed)]
・I didn't voice my conclusion on what to do until before noon, but I had already made up my mind since the morning.
・I can't keep the kitten, sad, sad, sad.
・I told my husband, I disappointed him, even though he was looking forward to it so much... This feels somehow harder than my own sadness...
・I contacted the acquaintance who is fostering the cat, ah, it's confirmed that I won't be keeping it... ah, ah, ah.
・My husband is strangely cheerful and high-spirited, he's forcing it, he's trying to be cheerful for my sake...
・How should I process these kinds of emotions...
(Even now, remembering it makes me want to cry...)
What is this emotion when someone cares for another? It's so moving it makes me cry. The kindness and affection sink in, and my chest feels tight and painful. It's an emotion that can't be put into words. A situation where things just aren't going well. Maybe this reluctant feeling is the "Hierophant (Reversed)."
Oh, that's right!
I forgot something important!
This was the most important thing on this day!!
・After dinner, my husband tried to act normal and started talking to me while watching 'Shoten,' but I had my earphones on watching YouTube and just replied 'Mm, yeah.' Then he made a blank face, said 'I'm turning off Shoten,' turned off the TV, and said 'I'm going to sleep now' before heading up to the bedroom on the second floor. That felt so incredibly sad, and I thought, 'Oh, this can't end like this.' So I cleaned up the first floor and immediately went up to the bedroom to be near him. It was like a night where two people who were trying not to show their deep sadness on the surface were on the verge of breaking down—that kind of atmosphere? It felt like a sad, precarious night, like standing on thin ice. Since I chased after him right away, I feel like we managed to escape that dangerous atmosphere. If I had left it as it was, it would have been dangerous... that's the kind of vibe it had.
It might be an exaggeration to say 'the devil's hand was creeping in,' but I think this is when emotional gaps, like buttons being misaligned, are born. It was a dangerous feeling that still gives me chills when I remember it. Does 'The Hierophant (Reversed)' appear for that kind of meaning too?
11/10 [Queen of Crystals (Upright)]
・I worked as usual.
・My husband acted cheerful for me.
・I think I acted normal too.
・Though we were both carrying various emotions inside, probably.
・I mean, it's disappointing, and it feels reluctant, but it can't be helped, that kind of feeling.
・Like, I feel bad for my husband, or Kotaro was so cute, or ah, every time I see these goods I bought, I feel like I'm going to cry.
・Oh, that's right! I remembered!
I remembered this day so clearly!
・A colleague at work had a strange attitude and it left me feeling uneasy!! What was that about? Did I do something to make them angry?? I had that uneasy feeling, and my head was full of question marks.
This left a huge impression on me this day!!
・I went to bed very early.
Between my husband the night before and my colleague on this day, they were both sending some kind of warning ⚠️. What was it? Is it something I'm doing without realizing it??
Or is it just that my sensitivity sensor is easy to pick up on things right now? Ever since I was young, I've occasionally been hit by sudden anxiety, and when others act like this, I think, 'Eh, what? Did I do something to make them angry??'
And then I hurriedly reflect on myself... 😅
'Queen of Crystals,' huh. Does this card match the impression of this day?
If I try to force a connection, maybe it's that things became easier financially by not keeping the cat. Is that it??
11/11 [Page of Crystals (Reversed)]
・Work went smoothly.
・It was a very peaceful and calm day.
・My husband has also been peaceful, calm, and kind since we escaped the momentary crisis on Sunday night.
'Page of Crystals (Reversed),' huh... what could that mean? I can't think of anything that fits...?
11/12 Wed [The World (Upright)]
・Well, I worked peacefully.
・My husband was also peaceful and calm.
・And tomorrow, Thursday, is my day off. I'm going on a day trip to Kyoto with my parents tomorrow. 🚃✨
It's before my day off, work is going well, no trouble with my husband—maybe the 'World' card is showing me such a peaceful day?
Oh, that's right!
During work that day,
・I suddenly got anxious that there might be something wrong with my heart, so I looked up whether I should get a checkup at the hospital 😵💦
・I even thought about canceling tomorrow's trip to book a hospital appointment. But I decided to go ahead with the trip, thinking the checkup could wait.
・I've had palpitations when I go to sleep at night, and it gets a bit worse when I lie on my left side, which has been bothering me for a while. Plus, when I measure with my blood pressure monitor, a heart icon indicating a 'pulse interval variation sign' appears, which is scary.
(I thought about going on Saturday, but once the immediate worry passes, I just think, 'Oh well, it's fine')
Should I take this as a sign that there's nothing to worry about and it's okay...? Oh, I mean about 'The World' card.
11/13 Thu [Page of Swords (Upright)]
・Day trip to Kyoto with my parents
・I bought a discount ticket first thing in the morning, but it gave an error at the ticket gate. I went to the station staff, asking, 'Why?' and they said, 'This is a date-specific ticket, so please change the date at the Green Window.' Oh, really? So I had it changed at the Green Window and was able to use it safely, but my impatient father said, 'Shouldn't you have just bought a regular ticket?' No, I didn't realize it was like that!
But, in the past, we would have argued and fought right there, but my father said it hesitantly, and I didn't get angry and stayed calm. I'm even a bit moved that we, as parent and child, have finally reached this level of peace! Lol. We really are a father and daughter who fight a lot.
I've written about this before, but my mother is a fairy. And so, what about my father? My father is like Fudo Myoo (Acala). He has a face like a demon tile, and he really is like Fudo Myoo. He gets so angry. It was really scary when I was a child. From around puberty, I started talking back to him strongly, and for a while, we didn't get along at all. We might have gone for quite a long time without speaking. And now that I'm an adult, we might be peacefully getting along. This might be the time in our lives when we get along the best.
A Kyoto trip with such a father. I was a little nervous about how it would go, but in the end, the three of us were able to travel peacefully, calmly, and happily.
I also drew an omikuji fortune.
I love omikuji and draw them often 😊
I like to listen to them as if they are messages from the deity of that shrine. Is it the same vibe as drawing tarot cards?
The other day, IRO also drew an omikuji and got a 'Chukichi' (middle blessing) didn't they? I got a 'Chukichi' too 🤭 We're the same.
Also, when I get a good result, I'm the type to put it in my wallet as a charm. If it's a bad result, I tie it up to have it taken care of.
What do you all do when you draw an omikuji? 😊
Is it time to give my all to my business!? 😳
I've got to work hard then! 💦
It says I'll be blessed with financial luck, but I shouldn't get carried away, haha. 🤣 Understood! I won't get carried away! I'll be careful! Lol
After visiting Kamigamo Shrine ⛩️ and having lunch, we had no plans, so we discussed where to go and decided on Kinkaku-ji, which I hadn't been to yet.
My mother said she went on a school trip when she was a child. But it was so long ago she doesn't remember it. My father has been many times, so he had zero interest. Well, he said he was fine as long as he could walk, so we decided to walk. Lol
So, when we looked up how to get there, it seemed we could take a bus, and we were walking looking for a bus stop, but then we thought, why not just walk all the way to Kinkaku-ji!? So the three of us walked the roughly 50-minute journey, step by step 🚶🚶♀️🚶
This might have been the most fun part of the trip 🤭
My father is the type of person who just wants to walk, no matter what.
And neither my mother nor I dislike it, so the three of us walked for our health.
And finally, we arrived at Kinkaku-ji.
It was so far! 😅💦
・It was a day where we enjoyed a trip like that
The 'Page of Swords,' huh. Lol. Well, I was naturally always being considerate about how to get there, the time, what to do next, and whether my father was having a good time, so in that sense, maybe it is the 'Page of Swords' 😆
11/14 Fri [Temperance]
・Rarely, I was approached by two bosses at work with an 'air of wanting to complain about my work progress,' and since I wasn't particularly behind, I was like, 'Huh? 🧐???'
・I initially thought, 'Oh well, whatever,' and let it slide, but
I felt, 'No, something is wrong,' and tried to confirm it with one of the bosses. As a result, it was a complete misunderstanding on that boss's part, and I was falsely accused, so I received an apology and it was resolved. I'm glad I spoke up about this. If I hadn't, I probably would have remained misunderstood. I felt proud of myself for properly confirming it.
・What was even more commendable was that I was able to speak very calmly. Later on, I gradually got angry, and I was extremely irritated by the fact that the impatient boss, not the calm one I confirmed with, had made assumptions and pressed me, but I was proud of myself for not lashing back at that time. Lol. Having a father who is like Fudo Myoo, when I get angry, the same Fudo Myoo comes out, and I have a personality just like my father's. I don't think I'm as much of a Fudo Myoo as my father, but I do have the impulsivity to firmly respond with anger against unreasonable things. However, I didn't show that and responded very calmly. I was proud of myself.
As an aside, I used to think that getting angry in a fit of rage was a very unpleasant and embarrassing behavior, and a personality trait I wanted to fix, but recently it's different. I realized that anger is a very important part of me, and thanks to this anger, I am able to say what I want to say.
If I didn't have anger, I probably wouldn't have the power to convey something to the other person and would just end it by thinking, 'Well, it's fine if I just endure it.' It takes a lot of power to convey things one by one, right? Especially when it's something difficult to say. The other person might get angry, and if they do, you have to bathe in that emotion. If you have HSP, you'll be so exhausted by the energy of the anger directed at you that you'll be wiped out, you know 😭
But the anger that wells up from within me goes beyond that and gives me the strength to say, 'There's no way I can just let this go! 💢' I realized it's such an important emotion, so I've become able to thank my anger (inside myself, for my sake) for being there for me 😊
・Other than that, it was a very peaceful day.
Isn't the way I handled this day exactly 'Temperance'!
Wonderful 👍✨
Haa~, that was long~ 😅
I'm tired~
Since the day isn't over yet today, let's just call it good with the reflection up until yesterday 😊
Thank you for reading this far. It was long, wasn't it? Here, have some tea 🍵
🤭 Well then, see you again~ 🖐️
いいなと思ったら応援しよう！
いただいたチップは愛の循環に使わせていただきます💕