When your 'sensor' goes off the charts: A story about luxurious stalling and finding a path to acceptance
Today was a day of storms, both in my heart and my body. Between the illnesses I carry and the emotional sensors that were swinging more violently than ever. I want to say 'help me,' but once I rely on those around me, the next moment I am struck by a sense of regret (guilt) that leaves me unable to move.
To you, who are in the midst of such a 'battle with yourself,' and to those who live with similarly overly sensitive sensors.
1. Allowing your overly high-performance sensor to 'malfunction'
The trait of sensitivity (HSP) is essentially a gift—a 'high-precision sensor' for capturing the world vividly. However, when your physical strength drops and heat or pain pile up, that sensor sometimes 'goes off the charts.' You might call an ambulance in a panic thinking, 'I have to do something right now,' or conversely, you might stand frozen on a road under the scorching sun, paralyzed by the regret of 'I can't cause anyone any more trouble.'
It is not because you are weak. It is the result of your sensor working at full capacity, trying its best to protect your life..
First, tell yourself, 'Good job today,' for surviving the day.
2. A switch called 'acceptance'
Even when people give us sound advice like 'you should do this,' we sometimes cannot move right away. It is similar to that feeling of 'I was planning to do my homework, but the moment my parent told me to do it, I lost all motivation.'
It takes time for the switch of 'acceptance' to click into place within you. No matter how much those around you rush you, you cannot truly move forward unless it is at your own timing. Try to think of this as a time for 'luxurious, thorough worrying' to find that switch.
3. A shelter called 'text' rather than 'voice'
For those with sensitive sensors, the 'tone of voice' of others can sometimes pierce like a sharp blade. A questioning 'Huh?' or the casual sharpness at the end of a sentence can make you feel 'rejected' and cause you to freeze.
When that happens, why not try using a shelter called 'email'? With text, you don't have to be directly exposed to the tone of the other person's emotions, and you can organize your thoughts and convey them at your own pace.
Putting 'help me' into text is a respectable technique for protecting yourself.
4. Sleep like the dead and store up your strength
Having a new diagnosis is proof that you have been 'trying too hard until now.' Your physical strength is low and your sensors are hypersensitive right now, but this is only your state 'for now.' You are a person who originally possesses the 'fighting power' to demonstrate surprising ability to act once you have accepted things.
Today, stop the unnecessary thinking for a moment and sleep like the dead.
Drink water, stay in a cool place, and just rest your body. That rest is the most important job you have to turn your sensor back into a 'gift' tomorrow.