Humility and Charm

I will keep it brief again today.

Having confidence in yourself—what does that actually mean?

Does it mean comparing yourself to others and thinking you are wonderful?

Does it mean believing that you are right?

Many people irresponsibly advise you to "have confidence," but if you only push your own agenda with total confidence, you will inevitably clash with those around you.

On the other hand, I also think it is wrong to just keep pace with those around you and never assert what you truly believe to be right.

Having confidence in asserting yourself and being concerned about how others see you seem like contradictory actions to begin with.

As a way to resolve this contradiction, it seems necessary to recognize that having confidence in yourself and asserting your opinions are not the same thing.

I have a normal amount of self-confidence, and I always think that I want to state my opinions clearly.

My opinions frequently clash with others, but I do not fear conflict more than necessary.

However, even if there is a conflict at work, for example, I believe it should not be allowed to turn into a conflict between people.

You should have confidence in yourself and you should assert your opinions, but I believe it must not develop into a clash between human beings.

So, how can we prevent work-related conflicts from developing into personal disputes?

I believe there are two keywords for solving this.

They are “humility” and “charm.”

“Humility” means that when you assert your opinion, you do not assume that your opinion is absolutely correct.

“Charm” means that even if you make strong assertions or adopt a confident attitude, you are still received by others with affection.

Viewing oneself with humility does not mean losing one's self-confidence. Rather, I find that constantly considering the possibility that one might be wrong somehow increases the desire for self-approval.

What is correct or the right answer changes depending on the era and one's position. I believe that one's own arguments should also always be subject to change.

Isn't it healthier for one's mental well-being to take such a relaxed approach?

Also, I feel every day that we live in a society where people who are lovable tend to benefit in various ways.

This has to do with one's innate character, so it is not something that can be easily acquired, but I don't think it is a disadvantage to try to become a person worth loving.

And, in order to show lovability, it seems that some degree of humility is indeed necessary.

People easily say that one should have self-confidence, but perhaps it is important to have the will to acquire humility and lovability so that one can maintain confidence while avoiding human conflict with those around them.