You Are Not Your Role [Ultra-Spirituality Monism: Practical Edition 11]

You are not your role

We live out many "roles" in our daily lives.

・Parent
・Child
・Boss
・Subordinate
・Lover
・Working professional
・Proper adult

Without realizing it, we identify ourselves with those roles.

A role is a "function," not an "existence"

A role is a behavior necessary in a certain situation. But it is not you yourself.

・I couldn't be a good parent
・I couldn't behave as expected
・I wasn't my ideal self

None of these things lower your value.

Suffering is born from the "fixation of roles"

A role becomes a source of suffering when you can no longer take it off.

・I should be this way
・I must do this
・I must be thought of in this way

The role becomes armor, and you become unable to move.

You can change your roles

Roles are like clothes you wear depending on the situation. Even if they are necessary at work, you don't need to bring them home. Even if they are necessary in front of someone, you can take them off when you are alone.

What remains when you take off your roles

When you take off your roles one by one, what remains at the end is:

・The self before being evaluated
・The self before being expected of
・The self that is nobody

There, you will find your inherent stillness.

When you become free from roles, you become kinder to others

When you are bound by roles, you impose those roles on others as well. But when you become free yourself, you can accept that others are free to be themselves, too. That is a natural relationship.

Practical Points

When you feel tired, ask yourself this: "What role am I wearing right now?" Then, try taking it off, even if just for a moment. That alone will change your breathing. You are not a role. You are the being who uses roles.