Let's Try 'Forgiveness' | Looking at the 'Truth' Deep Within Our Emotions [Part 2]
Introduction: 'Taking one more step closer to your own heart'
In the previous part, I shared that 'noticing your fuzziness and irritation' is the beginning of forgiveness.
This time, we will take one more step
'Why did I react so strongly?'
and practice looking at what lies 'deep' within that.
This requires a little bit of courage. But in return, it is a step where you will feel a significant sense of your heart suddenly becoming lighter.
1. Your true feelings are hidden 'deep' behind superficial emotions
For example, have you ever felt emotions like these?
'It makes me angry that they are the only one getting praised.'
'Why am I the only one getting the short end of the stick?'
'I'm not that great anyway...'
While these reactions are superficially 'anger,' 'dissatisfaction,' or 'feeling down,'
in reality, deep inside them,
'I don't want to be abandoned,' 'I want to be acknowledged,' 'I want to be treated with care,'
these 'true feelings' or 'fears' are very often hidden.
Deep within your emotions, there is always something you 'want to protect.'
2. The assumption that 'I must be special'
Something many people hold unconsciously is
'I have no value unless I am special'
the assumption that:
It could be the experience of 'only being praised when I worked hard' as a child, or an environment where you feel 'if I don't stand out, I have no value' due to social media.
It takes root through various triggers.
But this causes us a great deal of suffering.
'I must be special,' 'I must be recognized,' 'I must be right.'
Because we keep putting pressure on ourselves like this.
3. Specific Scenes and 'What Lies Beneath'
How can we look deep into our hearts in our actual daily lives?
Scene 1: Not being evaluated by my boss
Surface: Frustration, disappointment, 'Why is it always me?'
Deep: 'If I'm not recognized, I have no value,' 'I want to be seen'
Scene 2: Feeling uneasy about a friend's bragging
Surface: 'Annoying,' 'I'm jealous'
Deep: 'I feel like I have nothing,' 'I don't want to be left behind'
Scene 3: Being rejected by family
Surface: 'Why do you say it like that?', 'I'm sad'
Deep: 'It's scary not to be understood,' 'Maybe I'm not good enough as I am'
Noticing these 'voices from the deep' is the intermediate step of forgiveness.
4. Practice: 'I wasn't right, I was just scared'
Once you have looked at your emotions, the next stage is to 'loosen your perceptions.'
To do that, try whispering something like this in your heart.
'I was angry, but really, I was just scared.' 'I was clinging to being right. But that was because I was anxious.' 'I'm glad I noticed the 'lack' I was feeling.'
These are not words to blame yourself.
Rather, they are words to comfort yourself, saying, 'You've done a good job protecting yourself up to this point.'.
5. From Thinking to 'Prayer'—A Gentle Dialogue with the Heart
From here on, little by little,
From 'Rightness' to 'Stillness', from 'Proving' to 'Acceptance'
it is time to shift.
After looking at your emotions,
Close your eyes just as you are and take a deep breath
Speak to yourself in your heart, saying 'It's okay'
Try to feel the 'silence' of that moment
Such a quiet time might be the deepest place of forgiveness.
Conclusion: 'Meeting the True Voice Within Yourself'
'Forgiveness' is not about forgiving someone else, nor is it about changing yourself.
It is about noticing the 'true voice of yourself' and embracing it.
This exercise was a bit more in-depth, but if you thought, 'I'll give it a try,' you have already begun to forgive.
Next time, we will finally move on to the perspective of 'forgiving the world itself'.
Taking it slow is fine. Let's continue together again.