25 years as a childcare worker. After finishing one major job, moving on to the next stage.

I have crossed one major mountain in my childcare career.

I feel relieved,
a little lonely,
but also looking forward.

I have worked as a childcare worker for 25 years.
Six of those years were as a facility director.

There were times when I felt crushed by the weight of responsibility. I struggled with staff shortages and wrestled with the gap between ideals and reality.

Even so—

The children's smiles.
The parents' "thank yous."
The presence of colleagues and subordinates who worried, laughed, and persevered with me.

It has truly been a childcare career blessed with wonderful people.

Life's turning points changed me

In the last few years, I have taken the helm of my life many times.
Changing my environment with the intention of getting married.
Choosing to part ways due to differences in values regarding fertility treatment.

After that, I met my current husband,
and remarried with surprising speed.

And—

Losing my beloved daughter to stillbirth.
This event changed my outlook on life significantly.

There is no "someday."
There is no "eventually."

Life is much more fragile than we think.

That is why I decided:
to steer my own life.
To carve out my own path.
To keep choosing the present so I have no regrets.

What she taught me
was not just the preciousness of life.

It was "the resolve to live my own life."

Four months left to give it my all

I have just over four months left as a childcare worker.
From now until the end of March,
I will fulfill my responsibilities as facility director to the very end.
I will carefully organize the handover
and prepare to pass the baton with peace of mind.

And at the same time—

Recruiting models for skeletal massage.
Preparing to launch.
Building a foundation as a therapist.

Honestly, doing this all at once is tough. Haha.

But strangely, I feel excited.

I want to continue being a 'person who stands by others'.

I spent 25 years in the field of childcare.

It may seem like a job of watching children,
but I believe it was actually a job of supporting 'families'.

Behind a crying child,
there is sometimes a mother who hasn't been able to sleep.

Behind a child who gets angry,
there is sometimes an adult who has no room left to give.

I have always
tried to feel what lies 'deep inside' the person in front of me.

That will not change.
The stage is just changing from a nursery school to a salon.
The object of my touch is just changing from children to adult bodies.

But the essence is the same.

Noticing the voices that go unheard.
Telling those who cannot relax that 'it's okay'.

I am just changing my title,
not my way of life.

From now on, too,
I want to be someone who stays by someone's side in life.

A little lonely,
but with resolve,
I am properly looking forward now.

On to the next stage.

I will steer my own life.

Because I have decided so.