The Shape of My Family | Kindness within strictness, strictness within kindness.

Kindness within strictness. Strictness within kindness.

Whether at work, at home, or with friends, I have always interacted with others using this style.

“Spoiling”and “kindness”are different things, I believe.
The line between them varies from person to person, but
I am often told that I am “strict but kind.”

Allowing someone to push things they don't want to do onto others is not kindness.
That is a sign of “dependency.”
That is why, first and foremost, I teach that it is important to understand your own responsibilities and to say “thank you” when asking someone for a favor.

When I encourage my son to tidy up, I try to
ask him, “Who was playing with these?”

My son sometimes says, “Mom, you clean it up!” but he reacts properly to the question, and it seems that somewhere in his heart, he feels that he needs to do it himself.

Rather than ordering him to “clean up,”
I hope he can gradually learn to take responsibility for the things he uses himself.

After a meal, I try asking,
“Who dropped this?”

He has started to pick up and clean up the grains of rice and food he dropped himself.

Doing what he can, little by little, on his own.
I would be happy if he could keep building on that.

When I see people acting bossy because they were “born first” or are “older,” I can't help but think that they have nothing else to rely on.
That, too, might be “relying on age or status.”

Having been subjected to many restrictions by an overprotective mother and older brother.
Having been told repeatedly, “You're just the little sister.”
Perhaps because of those experiences, I have come to feel, both in club activities and at work, that “being bossy just because you were there first is wrong.”
Rather than hiding behind age or status, I want to be someone who leads by example.

“This is how I felt,” “Why don't you try it too,” “Think about it.”
I value communicating in my own words like that.

Even in a family, ways of thinking are completely different.
That is precisely why you must not force your views or take advantage of your position.
I strongly believe that you must not rob children of their “opportunities to experience things.”

Even if I am usually strict, I watch the other person's expression, and when they are feeling down, I gently reach out to them.
I believe that both at work and at home, “consideration” should be the foundation.

This is the “shape of family” as I see it.

#TheShapeOfFamilyToCome