Why Do Neurodivergent Individuals Struggle with Communication? — The Structural Discrepancy of "Layers"
Introduction
Many people perceive that "individuals with developmental disabilities struggle with communication." However, is this not caused not by a mere difference in ability, but by a structural discrepancy where they are looking at different layers? In this article, from the perspective of deep perceivers and those with developmental traits, I will examine why communication goes awry, focusing on the mismatch between cognitive hierarchy and social structure.
Looking at Different Layers
People who navigate social life by referencing superficial layers, and those who unconsciously read deeper layers—such as structures, motives, the essence of relationships, and the flow of the unconscious. Between these two, the very premises are misaligned.
Layers Considered Important in Society
Reading the context
Appropriately picking up "signs" such as facial expressions, tone of voice, and the atmosphere
Behaving in a superficially safe and cooperative manner
Maintaining the "harmony of the moment"
These are skills that function on the surface layer and are considered evidence of "maturity" and "adaptation" in social life.
Layers Unconsciously Observed by Neurodivergent Individuals
The structure, contradictions, and true intentions behind the other person's words
The consistency of information not appearing on the surface
Trying to find the "basis" rather than the "noise" of the atmosphere
A hypersensitive sense of discomfort toward dishonest attitudes or affectation
As a result, they are labeled as "not acting like an adult," "unable to read the room," or "having a harsh way of speaking."
Mismatch with Society
Society demands superficial smoothness. However, what neurodivergent individuals are sensing is the stratum shifting "beneath" that. Therefore, they easily experience a sense of alienation in daily conversation and social situations, feeling that they are "not looking at the same thing."
Even if they possess intelligence that is useful to society:
They do not overlook the "superficial" dissonance of daily life and get hurt.
Unconsciously emitting a sense of discomfort, leading others to perceive one as "unpleasant"
That is labeled as a "developmental disorder" and regarded as a "defect"
What is an "adult"?
Is being an "adult" defined by the ability to adapt to society?
Or is "maturity" defined by being sincere toward the essence of things?
Conclusion
Developmental disorders are not merely malfunctions.
Adopting the perspective that "we see different worlds"will likely be the first step toward true coexistence.
Note that not everyone diagnosed with "developmental tendencies," or everyone who possesses such tendencies, fits the hypothesis presented in this article.
Please keep in mind that the traits of a person that can be evaluated superficially and the depths of a person are entirely different matters.
This article is an exploration rooted in the author's physical sensations and experiences, articulated through dialogue with AI.
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