A Light for Smoldering Days

Deep in my chest,
there is something smoldering, unable to burn out.

It is a nameless spark
that wants to become something.
a nameless spark.

I want to be of use to someone.
In a corner of this world,
I want to light a small flame.

However,
fog hangs over the forest of my thoughts,
and the voice of an invisible 'enemy' whispers in my ear.

—It's impossible for you
—You're still not enough
—You might be laughed at

Even though that voice is an illusion,
it is more real than reality,
and it trips me up.

The reason I feel exhausted before I even act
is because the battle is not outside,
but against the 'premonition' within myself.

Burning a future that hasn't happened yet
over and over again,
I dye today
in shades of gray.

Even so,

a single light
ignites within this fog.

—I,
still want to live.

—I,
do not want to discard
my wishes.

The imaginary enemy,
and the emotions that remain unburned,
I will take them all with me,
and move forward on these feet.

Even if today's step
is taken upon tears.

Afterword
I am always
on the verge of being crushed by the anxiety of a hope that I don't know if it exists in the future.

Sometimes I fight invisible enemies,
and lose without anyone ever knowing.

Even so, I—
it's okay if it's small,
I have decided to move forward with a light in my heart.

I've turned last week's poem into a short video again (*^^)v
Nigella flowers have finally bloomed in my garden after several years, so I'm sharing this with the message: 'You haven't forgotten your dreams; you have been planting seeds all along.' ( *´艸｀) Please take a look! 😊

Imagining the spirit of the Nigella flower ✨