Choose based on your own conviction, rather than 'someone else's expectations'.

Before I knew it, I was acting based on 'someone else's expectations'.

“What will they think if I say this?”
“Maybe it will leave a bad impression if I refuse.”
“I want to meet their expectations.”

...Don't you ever find yourself thinking and acting like that?

I was like that for a long time, too.

Especially when I first started as a freelancer,
I had such a strong desire to not lose trust and to keep being chosen that I
convinced myself that meeting the other person's expectations was the only right answer.I truly believed that.

But as I kept doing that, a certain sense of discomfort began to build up.

Working only to 'meet expectations' will eventually lead to burnout.

Fulfilling someone's expectations is a wonderful thing.
You get thanked and you earn trust.

But when that accumulation starts to feel like an 'obligation',
your heart gradually begins to wear down.

• Thinking too much about what will please the other person, and unable to express my own opinions.

• Prioritizing 'what is expected' and putting 'what I want to do' on the back burner.

• Pushing myself to take on tasks, only to regret it at night.

When days like that continue,
no matter how much I achieve, I feel 'unfulfilled'.

Before I knew it, I started to vaguely wonder,
“What am I working so hard for?”

Accumulate your own 'conviction' rather than meeting 'someone else's expectations'.

At that time, someone said something to me.

In that moment, it hit me.

What I really want to do is
not 'chase expectations', but
to 'accumulate my own conviction'.

Since then, I have become conscious of 'choosing with conviction'.

To "choose with conviction" means "to have your own reasons."

Choosing with conviction is not about whether the result is correct, but rather
being able to explain the reason for your choice yourself.being able to explain the reason for your choice yourself.

• Why did I take on this job?

• Why did I want to work with this person?

• What does this choice mean to me right now?

When that "why" is clear, hesitation decreases.

On the other hand, decisions made "just because" or "because it's expected" are easily swayed by results and more likely to lead to regret.
results are easily swayed, and it is easy to regret.

I used to prioritize "what others would think" above all else, so
whenever the results were even slightly off, I would blame myself.

But now,
by accumulating choices that I can say "I am satisfied with this,"
I feel like I've become able to accept any outcome.💭

3 things you can do to increase "choices with conviction"

From here on,
I will introduce three things I have been conscious of to regain "my own conviction."🌿

1. Don't use "evaluation" as a standard

If you judge based on someone else's reaction or numbers,
your own "feelings" will gradually become dull.

"How did I feel when I tried it?"
Try using that as your standard for judgment.

Even if the reaction is small,
if you can think "I liked this," that is enough.

2. Re-ask yourself, "What do I want to do?"

In an era with so much information,
practicing listening to "your own voice" rather than others' voices is important.

"Is this really necessary for me right now?"
"What form do I want to do this in?"

Just by remembering to ask such questions from time to time,
you will become less prone to wavering.

3. Accumulate small convictions

It is okay not to change big decisions all at once.

When choosing today's tasks,
when choosing the words you share,
gradually increase the moments where you feel, "This is good."

The accumulation of small convictions
will eventually turn into "great confidence."😌

Letting go of "expectations" is about regaining "trust."

Letting go of someone else's expectations
is neither cold nor self-centered.

Rather, it is "trusting yourself."

When I prioritized others' perspectives,
I always put myself last, but
once I became able to choose "this is what I want to do,"
my actions naturally became more consistent.

As a result,
I feel that opportunities to be "trusted" have also increased.

"Meeting expectations" is wonderful, too.
But before that,
I want you to value your own conviction.

I believe that is
the first step toward creating a way of working that you can sustain without strain.🌸

Finally

If you are currently feeling
"I'm working hard, but it's painful"
"I have things I want to do, but I can't see my true self"
if there is anyone feeling this way,
please read this article as well.👇

Click here for consultations and inquiries

💌 Click here if you would like to consult via LINE

🪴 Click here for the consultation form on note