From a Welfare Household to a PhD from the University of Tokyo (Part 6)

I was almost never able to attend classes in the Department of Mathematics.

Just because I got into the Department of Mathematics didn't mean I could just study math.
In my case, I had to work a significant number of hours at a part-time job.

I was lucky enough to find a well-paying job, so I worked desperately.
Thanks to that, I was able to save not only for living expenses but also for money in case my tuition exemption application was rejected, as well as for graduate school expenses.

On the other hand, I had almost no time to attend classes in the Department of Mathematics.
In the first place, the university curriculum is not designed with the assumption that students will work long hours at part-time jobs.
Trying to attend classes while earning money for tuition and living expenses is an impossible task.

The saving grace was that the math department classes did not take attendance.
As long as you could get a passing grade on the exams, you could earn the credits.
That said, those exams were quite difficult.

Instead of attending classes, I carried math books around and read them all the time.
As a result, I was able to pass all the exams.
I had been good at self-study since I was preparing for university entrance exams.

"You won't have time for a part-time job in graduate school"

There is no graduation thesis in the Department of Mathematics at the University of Tokyo.
Instead, there is a course called 'Seminar' (Koukyu). In this course, you have a small-group (often one-on-one) seminar where you read a textbook with the professor in charge.

Each professor presents the textbook they will use in the seminar, and the students choose one to determine their supervisor, but
before it is actually decided, there is a preliminary interview between the professor and the student.
In that interview, the professor 'evaluates' the student to decide whether to actually conduct the seminar.

I chose the most difficult book among those presented and contacted the professor who presented it to have a preliminary interview.

I think it is fair to say that the atmosphere of the preliminary interview was bad from beginning to end.
Apparently, my knowledge of mathematics was not enough to satisfy that professor.
Furthermore, the professor acted as if I lacked the aptitude to become a mathematician.

The professor for the seminar often becomes the student's graduate school supervisor as well.
Perhaps because of that, the conversation between that professor and me shifted to the topic of life in graduate school.

I was also feeling financial anxiety about life in graduate school.
So I expressed my anxiety, saying, 'I might have to work a part-time job even in graduate school.'

The professor simply replied, 'You won't have time for a part-time job in graduate school.'
I think the way they said it was as if I should just focus on my research instead of doing things like that.
It is certainly true that graduate students should focus on their research.

However, because economic support at the university and graduate school level was opaque, forcing me to work a significant number of hours at a part-time job, I took this statement as a clear insult.
At the same time, for someone like me who would find it difficult to attend school without working a part-time job, this statement felt like a denial of the legitimacy and significance of my own advancement to graduate school.

I really wanted to learn the textbook he had presented, so I didn't say anything back at the time.
But in the end, I wasn't accepted by that professor, so I ended up doing the seminar under a different professor.

Not limited to this incident, I feel that there was never any appropriate consideration for me throughout my time at the university and graduate school.

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