Let's try quantifying negative emotions
This article explains that when you quantify negative events or emotions, they become relativized, making you feel more at ease. It is a simple yet effective method.
The worst thing has happened!
“Please listen, the worst thing has happened!”
There was someone at work who spoke to me in a state of agitation.
Ideally, it would be best to book a quiet meeting room, listen carefully, process their emotions, structure the problem, and map out a path to a solution... but in the midst of a busy schedule, it is not always possible to take that kind of time.
“Come to think of it, that incident from six months ago was also very difficult to resolve, but if we set that at 100, what score would you give this current situation?”
“...I think it's about 50. Thinking about it that way, I feel like I can manage.”
Quantifying negative events
In the world of medicine and exercise therapy, there is a concept where patients are asked to express their pain on a scale (score) to help adjust treatment plans.
When something negative happens around us and we are caught up in bad emotions, we sometimes lose the ability to view ourselves and the surrounding situation calmly and objectively, making it difficult to judge the situation thereafter.
At such times, by recalling truly bad events from the past and comparing them with the current situation, you can sometimes regain a bit of composure.
When you unexpectedly come up with a high score
So, what should you do if, even after looking back, you still come up with a high score? Perhaps it really is a major event.
However, the probability of something truly terrible happening in the world is not that high. Immediately after an event occurs, there is a tendency for bias to set in, leading us to view the situation in a negative light.
Therefore, when it seems like a solution could be proposed based on the person's experience or ability, try asking the following:
“If you could lighten this situation by about 10 points, what kind of measures would you take?”
Alternatively, if you yourself have thought of the beginning of a solution, you might try asking this:
“If we try doing X, by how many points would this situation be lightened?”
By thinking of solutions and quantification as a set, compared to a state where you don't, you can approach the situation more calmly and gain a sense of progress toward a resolution.
It can also be used for negative emotions
In my case, when things don't go well in front of others, I compare it to past events and try to think, 'Compared to how hard that was, this is only about X percent.' By doing this, I am less likely to carry negative emotions like embarrassment for a long period of time.
Of course, to do this, you need to have a certain stock of past failure experiences. Thinking about that, I can't help but feel that getting older isn't all bad (laughs).
The idea that it is better for a boss to speak openly about their experiences, including their own failures, likely also has the implication of showing those around them a point of comparison.
Summary
I have introduced a simple yet useful method of quantifying negativity. This is a technique also used in anger management and similar fields. I have also provided links to other reference articles.