You don't have to force yourself to live 'correctly'

The other day, I met Mr. Sanada (a pseudonym), who helped me out when I was a municipal employee.
It seems he reads my notes, and he wanted to meet up and talk for the first time in a while. I was incredibly happy.

Mr. Sanada is an employee of a different municipality, not the one I worked for at the time. Since we happened to go to the same hair salon (and had the same stylist), we were aware of each other's existence even before we actually met.
However, we never really had the chance to meet. We had plenty of opportunities to say hello, such as attending the same work briefings or having Mr. Sanada as a lecturer for staff training, but I kept missing the timing.
After about five years of not meeting, I was finally able to face Mr. Sanada at a certain gathering. That was five years ago.

Since then, while we don't see each other all the time, I think we've reached a relationship where we check each other's recent status on social media.
What is worth mentioning is that I wrote a column for a municipal magazine at Mr. Sanada's recommendation. Thinking back, this was my first essay, so it is no exaggeration to say that Mr. Sanada is my origin as an essayist.

By the way, this person named Mr. Sanada is an incredibly capable man.
As I mentioned earlier, he serves as a lecturer for staff training and travels all over the country for both public and private activities; I think he is a talent too good for a mere civil servant (I am by no means looking down on civil servants).
On top of that, he is smart, broad-minded, a good talker, and his face is so youthful and cool that you wouldn't think he's in his 50s. He is one of the top three coolest older gentlemen I have ever met.

Phew, if I praise him this much, he won't complain to me. Oh, no, there is no doubt that everything I said is my true opinion.

A conversation between such a cool older gentleman, Mr. Sanada, and the unworthy Aruron took place in a corner of a rural town.

On the day, I stayed at Mr. Sanada's house—or should I say mansion or grand residence. He said he is a homestay host in partnership with Airbnb, so I used that service. The grand residence was so wonderful that I felt like I could live there forever.

Around 6:00 PM, as soon as I arrived, we headed to a long-established yakiniku restaurant with only a brief explanation of my stay. Even though it's a long-established place, it's a very clean shop that was just renovated. Apparently, if you don't go right when it opens, it fills up immediately. Luckily, we got a private room that day.
We ordered 'Horujin' (hormone and Genghis Khan). Mr. Sanada is the designated driver and doesn't drink alcohol at all, so his drink was a soft drink. Watching him, I decided to have my first alcohol in two months.
By the way, the top image of this article is [Aruron with his excitement skyrocketing in front of the Horujin] (borrowed from Mr. Sanada's social media). It was incredibly delicious.

It was a meal that lasted about two hours, but time passed in the blink of an eye. No matter how much time I had, it wouldn't be enough to talk with Mr. Sanada. It was that rich and meaningful a time.

We talked a lot about my present (struggling as a writer), my past (resigning due to panic disorder, the circumstances, etc.), and my future (how to level up as a writer from now on).
At times, I heard about Mr. Sanada's past (it seems there was a time when he was scatterbrained and irresponsible), and I couldn't hide my surprise. Among those experiences, there were several turning points for him, and he said those are what formed who he is today.

A major theme that emerged while talking was that "surprisingly, everyone doesn't really understand themselves well."
Have you ever had the experience of spending time in a fun place, but feeling somewhat uneasy when you get home? I have had such experiences myself, but that is just acting like you are having fun. And in a sense, that is lying to yourself.

According to Mr. Sanada,

"There is no correct answer in life. It is important not to lie to yourself and force yourself to live a 'correct' way of life."

It seems.
I truly think that is correct.
Whether you live seriously or live freely, living honestly according to your own feelings will lead to a life that suits you. In other words, it is the 'optimal solution'.

There are many people in the world who try to live 'correctly'.

'You should do this in this situation'
'This should be like this'
'This must be like this'

These kinds of 'should' theories are scattered everywhere.
However, in a society where various things are intricately intertwined, it is unclear what is 'correct'. Perhaps 'correct' things do not even exist. Yet, if you keep searching for the right answer, you will never be able to see the light of hope, and you will sink into the pitch-black darkness before you know it. Just like I once did.

Of course, there is 'correctness' such as rules to maintain order. On the other hand, there are countless problems without correct answers, and the answers to those often already exist within yourself.
However, people cannot open the box that contains those answers by themselves. The box is locked, and you do not have the key.
So, how do you get the key? It is important to talk to other people or read books. By talking to someone (or listening to them), your knowledge may expand, and you might make new discoveries through reading. The key to opening the box of answers is sometimes held by someone else. I think that leads to realizations, understanding, and turning points.

In the end, the 'correctness' prepared by someone else is meaningless, and you have no choice but to find your own path in life.

Mr. Sanada also said this.

"There are only two things necessary to live a rich life. 'Health' and a 'comfortable community'. Money, status, and power mean nothing without these two, yet for some reason, people fight for them and end up exhausted."

Even if you have as much wealth, fame, and power as Gold Roger, if you are sick and lonely, that cannot be called a rich life.
Conversely, if you are healthy in mind and body and have built good human relationships, life is enjoyable even if you are somewhat poor. Just like me right now.

A way of life that doesn't seek 'correctness' too much. People who can practice that are strong.
It will still take me a long time to reach that state of mind. Even so, I intend to continue working on myself so that I can remain natural without losing sight of who I am.

I finished my second highball and left the shop with Sanada-san.
Our conversation continued to flourish after this, but I'll save the rest for another time.

Part 2 is here↓