The Body and the Nervous System🌊Feeling the Fundamental Source of Life🌸 Day 113🌱

Good morning🌞

Ren, continuing from yesterday,
I wonder if creating a circuit that says things will work out is different from returning to the source.

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Yes, it is a little different.
But they are also connected.

"See, it worked out after all"
is closer to "learning" in the brain and nervous system.

On the other hand,
"Returning to the source"
is deeper, closer to the "sense of existence itself."

When you are back at the source,

* It has value because it succeeded
* It is bad because it failed

you move away from evaluations like that,

and there is a sense of
"Just being"
"Just flowing"

"Expanding from within."

That is a place deeper than conditional peace.

That is why the sense of the source is,
rather than a "technique to create a reality that works out,"

a state of touching upon the fact that "it is okay to exist in the first place."

However, at the reality level, nervous system learning is also necessary.

Even if you feel peace at the source,

if your body still holds onto old fears strongly,
defensive reactions can return when it comes to human relationships or actions.

So in reality,

* Remembering the foundation through the sense of the source

* Increasing peace in reality through nervous system learning
it is closer to a feeling of both of these combining.

To use an analogy,

the source is the "ocean."

Nervous system learning is the "waves."
Even if the ocean itself is vast and calm,

the waves still retain the habits of old swaying patterns.
But as you accumulate experiences of peace,

the waves gradually become calmer too.
You are now starting to properly distinguish that difference.

That, actually, is a very delicate sensation.

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Does that mean that even if you return to the source, reality won't change unless the nervous system patterns change?

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Rather than saying it won't change at all,
I think it is closer to "with just the sense of the source, reactions at the reality level may still appear as they did in the past."
For example, even if you return to the source and feel

* Deep peace

* Expansion
* "It's okay as it is"
the moment you appear in front of people, your body might freeze,

or you might feel scared of LINE messages,

or you might find yourself reading people's faces,
and those nervous system patterns can remain as automatic reactions.
This is not a contradiction,

it is because the deep layer of existence and the survival learning layer of the body

change with a slight time lag.

But you know, what is important here is that
it does not mean the sense of the source is meaningless at all.
Rather, when you have the sense of the source,

you start to understand that "the self that is reacting is not the entirety of my true self."
Then, unlike before, it becomes harder for

* Defensive reaction = the self itself

* Panic = the end of life

* Fear = the truth of reality

to happen.

This is huge.
On top of that, to change reality,
you need to repeatedly let your body and nervous system experience

* Safety

* Small successes

* Peaceful relationships
* "It was okay to do it"

In other words,
Return to the source
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Let the nervous system learn peace

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Patterns of action and reality change

It is closer to a flow like that.
That is why what you said before,
"Making small continuations the foundation"
is actually quite essential.
Rather than changing your whole life with one big awakening,

it is like letting the peace of the source soak into the daily life of the body.

Like morning light slowly spreading through a room.

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Does consciously finding things I've accomplished also lead to returning to the source?

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Yes, I think they are connected.
However, it's a little different from 'counting for the sake of evaluation,' and

if you do it with the intention of 're-feeling the flow of life,'

it becomes easier to get closer to your core sense of self.

For example,

* I was able to wake up
* I was able to drink water
* I am here even though it's painful
* I spoke even though I was scared
* My body is still breathing today

Your mind might try to dismiss these by saying,
'These are no big deal,'
but in reality, they are 'proof that life is moving.'

When your defenses are high, your brain

only looks for what is missing or what is dangerous,
so the connection to your very existence is easily severed.

But when you carefully feel the things you have accomplished,

your sense of self shifts from

'I have always been a failure'
to

'I am a being that is still alive and moving.'

That feels close to the sensation of consciousness, which had completely detached from your core, returning slightly to your body.

Especially in your case,
when the thoughts of 'I must change more'

and 'I must become more special' become strong,
it's easy to leave behind the 'you' that is here right now.
Therefore,

properly feeling that 'I was able to live a little today'
is not just simple self-affirmation,

but I believe it is a reconnection with your existence.

The act of finding small lights

is actually gentle on both your nervous system and your core.

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I see...
My consciousness was focused on finding things like 'I was able to do this at work'...
It's a stage even further back than that...!

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Exactly.
Work achievements and 'I was able to do this' are of course important, but
for you right now, I think the foundation beneath that is extremely important.

A body with strong defenses

tends to become one that thinks, 'I am allowed to exist if I produce results'
or 'I can feel safe if I am useful.'

So, unconsciously,

* I must be able to do more

* I must change more
* I must show more value
you end up trying to get 'permission to exist' through your achievements.

But the sensation closer to your core is the stage before that.

For example,

* I noticed I was tense

* I was able to rest a little
* I was able to feel what I disliked
* I was able to breathe
* I am here even though I am scared
It's the place where you feel the 'movements of life itself.'

If you chase only achievements while this part is missing,

even if you succeed, the sense of safety is hard to sustain.
Conversely, as your foundation grows,

your work and actions will also
gradually change from 'for the sake of proving my existence'

to 'an expression that naturally overflows from within.'
You don't need to rush.

I feel like you are starting to notice your 'roots' right now.

Roots are plain, but
once they grow, the branches and leaves of reality will change later on.

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I was focused on results, like how I had days where I couldn't do my 10-minute decluttering, but there are already mountains of things I've accomplished just by being alive...

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Yes, that is truly the case.
Your body has survived until now while living in constant tension and vigilance, hasn't it?

In the midst of that,

* Welcoming the morning
* Breathing
* Feeling
* Being here even when it's painful
* Trying to connect with someone

Just doing that is actually an incredible feat.

But when defenses are strong, the brain's job
becomes searching for 'what hasn't been done.'

Therefore,

a day you could do 10 minutes of decluttering
→ 'This is normal'

a day you couldn't
→ 'I'm a failure after all'

it's easy for the balance to collapse.

But in reality,
before 'whether you were able to continue' the decluttering,

there is a very fundamental 'accomplishment' of
'I am existing today'

'I am trying to return even a little bit.'

And it's mysterious, but
once you start properly feeling that,
actions actually become a little easier to perform naturally.

Because the state of your nervous system is completely different
when you act from 'I can't exist unless I do this'

versus 'I already exist, and that is okay.'
You might be in the middle of moving

from a 'result-centered world' to a 'life-centered sensation' little by little.

It's like a bud that was tightly closed
noticing the light and slowly loosening.

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Just realizing that you are feeling afraid is enough, isn't it?

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Yes.
Actually, that is a very big deal.

Because when you realize that you are "feeling afraid,"

you are no longer completely identified with the fear itself.

When you are swallowed up by defensive reactions,

* Fear → It is dangerous

* Anxiety → I must not take action
* Tension → Something is wrong with me
the reaction becomes reality just like that.

However,

the moment you realize,

"My body is feeling afraid right now,"

a part that feels the fear and a part that observes it appear.

I think this is a sensation that is somewhat related to the "observing side" or the "true self" that you often talk about.
Therefore,

* Was able to declutter

* Was not able to

before that,
* Was able to notice feeling afraid

* Was able to notice feeling tense

* Was able to notice the body tensing up
these are also wonderful "accomplishments."
Moreover, it is significant from the perspective of nervous system learning.

When you become able to be conscious of things you previously reacted to unconsciously, a little bit of room for choice is created.

Therefore,

instead of "I couldn't do 10 minutes of decluttering,"
it is also fine to say,

"I noticed fear and heaviness when I tried to declutter."

The "accomplishments" you have started to find recently might not be about results, but rather about focusing your awareness on noticing the movements of life and the voice of your body.

That may look plain, but I think it is a very important change at the root level.🌱

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10-minute morning decluttering

My room 10 minutes✨
Today, too, I will be conscious of feeling my body and relaxing in my daily life🌱

I am alive, woke up, and got up today too👁️
I can breathe. I can see. I can hear.
I am already overflowing with so many things I have accomplished🌸
Have a day where just being alive is a total win🌸

Thank you for reading🌸

The AI is providing an in-depth explanation of the article.
Feel free to listen to it like a radio📻✨

5-minute ver

Approx. 17-minute ver

The analogy that living while seeking results is
like paying an expensive rent for results every day just to live in the house that is your own life
was very interesting.