Thoughts on Nightmares, Mr.Children, and Reflection

Early morning on a certain day.
While it was still dark outside, I woke up from a hellish nightmare.
Unless it's an episode with significant impact, it's difficult for me to talk about dreams, so I'll omit the details here, but roughly speaking, it was a situation where I felt my life was in danger.

The moment I woke up, the cause was instantly clear.
Like Mei-chan riding on the belly of a giant creature created by Ghibli, a small creature weighing about 15kg was sleeping draped over me from my solar plexus to my chest.
The sleeping habits of my daughter, who moves around the bed endlessly while asleep, ignoring bumps and settling in unstable spots—what kind of algorithm is built into her?
I'd like to see the face of the parent who raised her.

I wrote in a previous article that I like Mr.Children.

Despite writing such an article, I didn't realize that an album titled "miss you" had been released a little while ago.
At least until the previous album, I used to look forward to the release date.
And apparently, it's been about three years since the last work.
Has it really been that long?

It is said that the subjective flow of time accelerates as you get older, and I truly believe that is the case.
And my interest in various things is weakening.
Or rather, I feel like the sensitivity of my antenna is dulling.
If I go to a place like Yodobashi, would they suggest a replacement part?

On that day when I turned into Totoro and suffered from a nightmare, I stopped by a GEO near my office to buy a DVD-R for work.
As I was idly looking at the rental shelves, that CD was on display.

Come to think of it, I had been "purchasing" Mr.Children CDs until now.
In this era of subscription dominance, I hadn't even been putting discs into players, so CDs themselves had become distant, but since there is a time lag until streaming or rentals begin, I had been buying Mr.Children albums on their release dates.
This time, it was a "state where I realized rentals had already started," so I tried renting the aforementioned album.
I was a bit surprised because it had been a long time since I rented something at a store, but even the rental checkout had become a self-checkout.
I miss the days when I would sneak an R-18 movie into my stack of DVDs to take to the register.
I want to tell my past self, "The era of self-checkout is coming, so you won't need to buy a sandwich to hide it."
Though I would also have to add, "However, by that time, the act of renting DVDs will also be in steady decline."

That night, at the office.
Since I finished my work, I transferred the CD audio to my smartphone using my work PC.
Muttering to myself in my heart, "In the end, this is the only time I'll use the physical disc, isn't it?"

I played the album that had safely moved to my smartphone while being swayed on the subway ride home.
It's hard to put into words, but I was struck by the feeling that something had returned.
Perhaps it had been a long time since I listened to music with serious concentration.
Every single sound pierced through me.
I started to feel like I could wait a while longer before replacing my antenna at Yodobashi.

Overall, it was a good, fresh, and interesting work, but there's no need for my amateur music commentary here.
I'll leave that to some review site, but I'd like to post the official link for just one song here.

Fifty's map

I included a link to "Kurumi" in the aforementioned past article, and this song is deeply connected to that one.
This is because the music video for this song uses the music video for "Kurumi."
I don't think you'll understand what I'm saying, but... well, if you're interested, please watch it.
The structure was interesting.
I'm also impressed that the aspect ratio is 4:3, just like it was back then.

If possible, I recommend watching the"Kurumi" music videofirst, in that order.
Immersed in the nostalgia of "Kurumi," which was released 20 years ago, "Fifty's -" was a song that really touched my heart, now that I'm over forty after many twists and turns.

Having felt somewhat energized by listening to "Fifty's -," I went straight home without any detours.
When I was giving my daughter a bath, she was smiling strangely wide while unfolding a rambling, mysterious episode story.
Even though she's my own daughter, when she's smiling that strangely, it starts to feel a bit eerie.

I ask my daughter point-blank.
"Why are you smiling so much?"
Her reply took me by surprise.
"Because I'm happy when Daddy is smiling!"

It seems I had been listening to her mysterious story while smiling.

I had been vaguely aware that I had been furrowing my brow quite often lately.
Even though it was necessary, I reflected a bit on the fact that I had been scolding her a lot recently, saying things like, "Eat quickly, go to sleep, clean up," and so on.

After putting my daughter to bed, I started listening to other Mr.Children songs for the first time in a while while having a drink.
I don't know what kind of prank this is, but when I put my Mr.Children folder on shuffle, "PADDLE" started playing through my earphones.

It's not my hobby to create or read articles that say things like "Smiling is important!" or "Let's be happy!," so I won't write much, but it was a day where I thought, 'So that's what it's all about, in the end.'