“Listen to me for a moment♪” — “Things I want to let go of now” —

Hello, everyone.

It is time for “Listen to me for a moment at note Cafe RaM”.

This is a program where I, RaM, talk about themes I have received to help soothe your little moments.

I hope you can stay with me for about five minutes.

Now, today's talk theme is from the “Writing Club” membership of Kotoba-san, and it is this!

“Things I want to let go of now”

Well then, let's get started with energy today.

Now, this theme, things I want to let go of now. Right.

Ah... that hits close to home. Haha.

Why it hits close to home is something I will talk about later...

So, I will announce it.

The thing RaM wants to let go of now is,

the ideal image of “how I should be” that I have been carrying on my own

is it.

Even though no one told me to, for some reason, there is an ideal image of 'how I must be' that I have been carrying around for a long time.

I use the term 'ideal image' here, but even though I call it an ideal, it is not a version of myself that I truly desired.

It was more like a feeling of, 'If I act like this, maybe I won't be disliked?'

Or perhaps it was a fixed idea that, 'My parents had this stance, so I must live this way or work this hard at home...'

Anyway, I realized that the values I had somehow ended up carrying without even knowing it were just too heavy...

As someone who is slow at all kinds of growth, I am the type who needs to put in dozens of times more effort than others just to keep up with those around me.

The 'I must do things properly!' shackle I placed on myself was a piece of combat gear I desperately sought out, developed, and equipped in order to survive outside the home.

But you know, since it was combat gear, it seems it was quite heavy.

It's no wonder my whole body became stiff... I understand that now, but back then, I must have been desperate to fit in with those around me and just keep living.

It is also true that thanks to this weight, there were days when I managed to take root and hold my ground.

However, it seems it was nothing but a burden on my body and mind.

Even as an adult, I have continued to carry heavy values, but things have increasingly not been going well.

While I kept running away from reality and drifting along, those around me were raising children or steadily building their careers... you know. (← If I talk any more about this, it will get depressing, so please understand.)

I realized that I had to live in a way that was different from the pace of life of those around me, or else I would become miserable.

Little by little, I am also coming to understand through experience that comparing myself to others is not meaningful.

It was at such a time that I was given the opportunity to have someone touch my body.

I was directly advised to let go of the work and values I had built up until now.

The reason I said at the beginning that it was hard to hear was because of this sequence of events.

Letting go of things I have desperately built up is scary, but it is not as if I have never let go of anything before.

I have let go of full-time jobs and, due to various circumstances, stepped away from stability, and I have the feeling that the current me is much more at ease than in the past.

So, there are only about 15 days left in 2025.

Although it is difficult to let go of everything, I think I will end today's segment by declaring the one value I want to let go of.

“In 2025, this is the one thing I will let go of!” is,

Not forcing myself to take on all the housework when I can't do it.

Well, I have borrowed your eyes and spent this time with you, but it is now time for “note Cafe RaM's Listen to me for a moment” to end.

May the rest of your time be peaceful as well.

Well then, let's meet again in the next broadcast.
This was RaM.

note Cafe RaM's “Listen to me for a moment♪” is a piece of writing that feels like an audio broadcast.

I haven't used my voice yet. Will the day come when I finally do?

↓ Please click here for past broadcast articles!

#Wrote this for the Writing Club prompt

Writing prompt
・Things I want to let go of now

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Thank you so much for reading until the end.

Here, I have prepared a warm coffeework☕ and am waiting for your visit.

I would be happy if we could meet again.