Living in the 'Post-Prime' Era

I remember the moment I fell in love.
It was an afterimage of a prime. A sweet memory that repeats forever.

I realized, 'Oh, they're similar.'
The nostalgia of the moment when forgotten memories are vividly revived, and the heartache of realizing that it is no longer 'now' but a 'memory,' stabs at my chest.
Amidst the joy of the certain realization that a new star had been born, I was also chewing on the cruelty of that similarity.

When I saw Okugawa-kun pitch for the first time in a while during the CS Finals, I couldn't hide my surprise at how much it resembled Sugano's pitching. From a professional's perspective, there are probably many differences, but Okugawa-kun's pitching matched the 'prime Sugano' in my memory so perfectly that I could vividly recall the feeling of the moment I fell in love with Sugano's pitching.

Pitching that was smooth, accurate, and seemed to be sucked into the mitt. I had seen wonderful pitchers pitch before that, but Sugano was the first one who made me feel, 'How beautiful baseball, how beautiful pitching is.'

I have seen many pitchers pitch since then, but Okugawa-kun is the second person to give me that same shock. The Sugano I wanted to see, the Sugano I fell in love with, was on the mound. Okugawa-kun's pitching was so beautiful and powerful that I almost hallucinated that it was him.

Ever since I was first shocked, I have always loved Sugano's pitching. His form changed after he hurt his lower back, and he has had more moments where he couldn't pitch as he wanted and would smile bitterly on the mound, but I love his proud pitching. To me, he is an irreplaceable, one-of-a-kind pitcher.

However, when I saw pitching that was the spitting image of the 'moment I fell in love,' I realized the cruel reality that time flows equally for everyone, no matter how much you love them.
You cannot fight the decline that comes with injury and age. He, who does not rely on mental theories, must surely know this best himself.

Even though we live in an era where people live to be 100, their prime ends around the time they reach their 30s. Rarely, there are players who are active or make a comeback from their 30s, but players who were active when they were young are inevitably compared to their past, so it is difficult to have a 'prime' in the latter half of their career. The players themselves also become desperate to regain the times when they were good.

Coincidentally, in the CS Finals, the day after Okugawa-kun pitched well was Sugano's turn to pitch. Inevitably, I ended up seeing the 'moment I fell in love' and his 'current form' in succession.

I suspect that Sugano was hurting somewhere that day too, and wasn't in top form. To begin with, he hadn't been in good shape all season, and it was his first start in four days, so I expected it to be a difficult game.
Even so, Sugano's pitching, which built the game despite the difficulties and held them down firmly at key points, still had the dignity of an ace. In the end, he fell apart in the 6th inning, but it was the kind of pitching that made me think that if we were going to lose with Sugano, then it couldn't be helped.

I love the back of an ace who carries the team's wins and losses on his shoulders and continues to throw while struggling and writhing. Precisely because Sugano continues to throw with pride no matter how bad his condition is, I can watch Sugano standing on the mound as if praying.

But I thought that I shouldn't force a 'prime' on him anymore. A wounded body will not return to its original state. As you age, your muscle strength and physical stamina decline. We must start from that reality.
I have to think about 'what's next,' not 'those days.'

Around the same time I was captivated by Sugano's pitching, I watched a documentary that followed him closely.

'If I can keep throwing, I don't care about being a starter. If they say I can keep throwing by changing my form to a sidearm or submarine, I'll remodel it as much as I need to.'

At that time, I believe his ERA was in the 1.00s, and it was around the time he won the Sawamura Award, his most fruitful period. In what could truly be called his prime, he was already training while thinking about the 'post-prime' era.
It was a shock that Sugano, who is more proud and strict with himself than anyone else, was prepared to let go of his pride as a starting ace and the form he had built up so far just to keep throwing. I thought that this person's pride was not in his position or his record, but in 'continuing to throw the best ball at that time.'
The reason I love Sugano is his pride as a pitcher.

The 'time I fell in love' will never return. But he continues to use trial and error, aiming for his 'next best.' Even if he is no longer a starter, or even if he spends a long time in the minor leagues, Sugano will surely continue to compete with dignity, throwing the best pitch he can at that time, without losing his pride as an ace.

And until the day he gives up throwing, I will continue to go to the stadium every time Sugano pitches, cry and make a fuss about winning or losing, write about the outcome on Note, and keep saying I love him, I love him. Life is longer in the 'post-prime' era.

I'm sure I'll never have peace of mind as long as he keeps throwing, but I hope every year that his suffering will be reduced even a little next season. I hope there will be more moments that make me want to pump my fist in excitement, or moments that make me want to see him hug Kobayashi on the mound.

I love the Sugano of 'those days' the most.
The way he is supple and efficient, and the ball is sucked into the spot where the catcher is set without a single inch of error, is something I can still watch for hours. If I could, I would like to catch that ball once, and if Sugano were to get injured and need a bone or tendon for his right arm, I have always thought I would gladly offer my right arm (though he probably wouldn't need it).

That is why, when I see a pitcher who resembles "the way he was back then," I feel a sense of sadness and pain.

But at the same time, I also love the current Sugano, who continues to pitch without losing his pride, even while struggling.
And I am sure I will continue to love the Sugano who will keep evolving from here on out.
Perhaps the feeling of "love" is something that updates automatically.

It is human nature to want to pull out the best memories and cherish them. As long as you are immersed in idealized memories, you will never get hurt.
Even so, I want to stay close to the story of "after the prime."
Even if it is not all beautiful, I want to feel the beauty of the "now," where he is struggling and suffering.

And the story will continue next season and beyond.
At the same time, the moments when I feel "love" should also continue to increase.