Use Affirmative Language!

The second half of the year begins tomorrow.
Reflect on the first half and set new goals for the second half.
If you have the opportunity to set goals, there is one thing I would like you to be slightly conscious of. That is...

When creating goals, do not include negative words.

We tend to use negative words without thinking.
Like "I won't work overtime this week" or "I won't snack."

It's common, but it's not ideal.

It is better to make goals "do something" rather than "try not to do something."

This isthe same when giving advice or making requests to others.

Don't stay up late → Go to bed early
Don't be late → Be on time
Don't make noise → Be quiet
Don't rush → Stay calm

The reason is thatpeople imagine the words they are toldbecause.
Therefore, even if you are told "don't do X," you imagine X the moment you are told.
Overtime, snacking, staying up late, being late, making noise, rushing... you imagine the things you don't want to do or don't want others to do, and you create that image.

Then, you are pulled toward that side.

As a result, you work overtime, snack, stay up late, are late, make noise, rush... A vicious cycle.

The phrase often used in elementary schools, "Don't run in the hallway," is being rewritten to "Let's walk in the hallway."
The extra step of having to think about what "don't do X" actually means is removed.

Perhaps common things like "class goals" also try to avoid using negative words.
If you have a chance to go to your child's school, I would like you to take a look.

Besides, humans reject negation.
Everyone is afraid of being denied, dislikes it, and it creates a sense of resistance. It's not easily accepted.
In other words, negative words are hard to resonate with the heart.

There is a song by Mr. Children called "Starting Over."
It is one of my favorite songs.

The lyrics of the chorus of this song.

This "world only I can go to" was actually originally"a world only I know"in the lyrics.

Sakurai-san rewrote it during the recording.
In a television program, Sakurai-san says this.

In this program, there is also a scene where he tries to change "don't know" to "cannot go."

In other words, the lyrics of this song changed from
"a world only Idon't know" → "a world only Icannot go to" → "a world only Ican go to".
Negative words were removed, and it truly gained strength.

The words stand out.
It comes across directly.
The sense of loneliness and confinement of "only I know" and "only I cannot go" changes into the hope of "only I can go."

By changing negative words to affirmative ones, it has turned into a more positive and powerful message.
This is exactly the effect of changing negative words to affirmative ones.

"Starting Over," I would like to analyze the lyrics of this song someday too.

Now, the opening words.
"When creating goals, do not include negative words."

There is already a negative word here. I must fix it.
If I were to fix it...

"When creating goals, use affirmative words."

And the title as well.
"Use affirmative words!"

Okay, this is good!
Most things can be expressed affirmatively while keeping the same meaning.

Replace negative words with affirmative ones.
When setting goals or asking someone for something, please try to be conscious of this.