Maybe I was a punk after all. — A super chubby woman in her late 40s, realizing it now.

I just had a sudden thought.

Maybe, just maybe,

I might be a punk.

No, I don't mean my appearance.

Right now,

I'm a super chubby woman in her late 40s,

and I look like I don't have a punk bone in my body. (lol)

It was different back then.

I loved Algonquins,

a gray T-shirt with a shocking pink logo.

A black miniskirt with a sash attached.

Tights, or bare legs with knee-high socks.

On my feet, Adidas sneakers or platform shoes.

Even now, when I think back,

I can clearly see 'the me from back then' right there.

But you know,

when I started dressing like that,

I lost a few friends.

'You're the big sister type, so why are you dressing like that?'

'You'd look better in something like Namie Amuro's style.'

That's what I was told.

At that moment, I thought.

—I should be free to wear whatever I want.

Thinking back now, I feel like that was everything.

Punk is probably,

not about clothes.

It's about a way of life.

Rather than choosing what someone else says suits you,

it's about choosing what feels right to you.

Rather than choosing 'what you should do,'

it's about choosing 'what you want.'

In exchange,

you might end up a little lonely sometimes.

But I thought that was okay.

Because,

when you choose for yourself,

you feel like you're truly living.

The me of today,

doesn't dress like I did back then.

But, I suppose the inside hasn't changed.

Writing what I like,

Feeling what I like,

Living as I please.

I cry easily, though (lol)

But even that included,

I suppose I am a punk.