Midwives' childbirth stories are somewhat comedic! ~ Between bodily sensations, knowledge, and reason
"What kind of birth do you have, midwife?"
This is a question often asked by pregnant women who are hospitalized or visiting the outpatient clinic.
As professional midwives, we usually tell others to "relax" or "breathe slowly."
But when it's our turn, our knowledge gets in the way, or conversely, we are too calm and end up looking at the situation from a bird's-eye view...
I would like to talk a little bit about the side-splitting "Comedy! My Childbirth!" stories that always start when midwives get together🤗
I hope this will be a source of vitality for tomorrow for pregnant women and the medical staff who support childbirth💫
1. Episode 1: Too calm, I restrain my husband
A story from a veteran midwife.
During her first childbirth, she thought, "It's not just this much," and while she was breathing through each wave of contractions, it progressed rapidly and the baby was born.
With that first-child curse, for her second, she left by car early while the contractions were still manageable.
(It is a well-known fact that labor progresses faster for multiparas than for first-time mothers)
Contrary to those preparations, the shaking of the car caused the labor to progress rapidly.
(The shaking of a car is quite effective for the progression of contractions)
Senior midwife: "Ah, this might be dangerous... (maybe it's coming out...)"
Her husband instinctively said...
👨🏻 "Should I pull the car over...?"
...No, no, no, no!!
"Keep going!!! (This is not the time to stop!)"
She shouted.
It seems that in the tense car, her instinct as a professional—"get to the delivery table as soon as possible"—won out.
(She arrived safely and gave birth to a healthy baby right away🫶)
2. Episode 2: The ordeal of a three-day weekend traffic jam
A story from another senior midwife.
Her contractions started on the first day of a three-day weekend!
She got in the car and set off!
The road that usually takes 20 minutes was, of all things, in a huge traffic jam! Of course it was, it was a three-day weekend...
It was 7 o'clock in the morning!
(As everyone knows, the traffic jams on the morning and evening of the first day of a long weekend are...)
She took a detour to head to the hospital, but... it took an unbelievable hour! She floated her consciousness into space and endured it with a blank mind...
The shaking of the car and the navigation system that wouldn't advance...
There is a rumor that the state of "nothingness" at that time might have been more amazing than any breathing technique...
She had a safe delivery🫶
3. Episode 3: Prodromal labor is still at home
This is a story about my own first child.
It started to hurt at night, but the intervals wouldn't shorten to 10 minutes...
Just when I thought it was 5-6 minutes, it would open up to 20 minutes...
"It's surprisingly painful! Prodromal labor!"
I was rolling around, groaning.
Just as I was thinking of sleeping when I could, my husband suddenly got up and started preparing.
He even carefully brought the frozen rice balls from the freezer,
and started lining up the hospital goods.
"👨🏻 Shall we go!"
...Wait...
"No, not yet."
"If anything, it hasn't even started yet."
👨🏻 Oh...
...Then shall we sleep...
The hand rubbing my lower back immediately ran out of energy, and he seemed to be fast asleep.
I felt him detach from my back.
Indeed, we hadn't discussed prodromal labor, had we? lol
...Midwife! I wanted to call one, even though it was just prodromal labor lol.
(He was able to be there for the birth safely🫶)
4. Even midwives are just one "person giving birth" when they are alone
The fun part of "life" is that even if you have knowledge, things don't go according to plan.
There is no evidence for when contractions will occur.
In short, the baby decides.
I always think that's amazing.
And babies are surprisingly good at reading the room.
I always think it's interesting to see natural childbirth, where you can see how they get better at deciding when, with whom, where, and how to be born🥹🍀
I think it's precisely because I have this desperate, yet precious experience that I can stand by the moms🌈