Breastfeeding was the gentlest conversation in the world. — What my eldest daughter taught me around the age of two and a half (at a time when consultations about weaning are increasing)

In March, consultations about weaning increase.
The reason is often that mothers are returning to work, and the children are of various ages.
I would like to talk about weaning, including the medical basis.

1. Is "ending at one year" already outdated? Breastfeeding today

One of the gaps between the past and the present is the trend that it is something to be stopped at one year.
I have also been asked by my mother, "Why don't you stop at one year?" In my mother's generation, it seems they would apply mustard to force weaning, and until recently, public health nurses also seemed to instruct that "nutrition disappears after one year."
(This may also depend on the region...)

As an international standard, the WHO (World Health Organization) now recommends breastfeeding for "at least two years."

As the basis for "two years or older":
• Continuation of immune function: Even after the second year, breast milk continues to contain important antibodies and plays a role in protecting children from infectious diseases.
• Nutritional supplementation: Even around the age of two, there are cases where about one-third of energy sources are obtained from breast milk, making it a high-quality nutritional source.
• Psychological stability: Breastfeeding is a "secure base" for children, and it is scientifically recognized that it helps emotional development.

As for the public image of breastfeeding,
"It takes away the mother's time," "It hurts," "It looks difficult"...
Such negative aspects tend to be emphasized.
However, is that really all there is to it?
Because the negatives are emphasized on social media and in the media, I have the impression that not only women but also medical professionals are finding it harder to talk about it.
As a midwife and as a mother, there is "the true joy of breastfeeding" that I want to convey.

2. A story that began with my "tearful mixed feeding"

"If they suck, it will come out."
Just after giving birth to my eldest daughter, I believed that without a doubt.
But the reality was a series of things not going as planned...
Before my secretion switch turned on, my daughter's small mouth would get tired, and she couldn't drink enough. Every time I supplemented with formula for what was lacking, I blamed myself.
I felt sorry and pathetic. I still cannot forget the day I cried while watching her sleeping face.
Our breastfeeding life, which started with such "mixed feeding," eventually went beyond the time of just providing nutrition and turned into an irreplaceable "game for two."

At 5 or 6 months, she would touch my breast with her hands while drinking, or smile when our eyes met, and I truly felt love.

When I came home from work.
When I lay down with a tired body after a night shift.
When my daughter pressed her face against my chest, there was a warm and irreplaceable time that went beyond words.

And when my eldest daughter turned two and a half.
Feeling that a second child was in my womb and feeling a bit of tension, I made a proposal to my daughter.
"I'm sorry, there's a baby in my tummy. Can you stop breastfeeding until the baby is born?"
At that time, she had been drinking a few times, but
"Okay," she said, and from that moment on, she didn't touch it at all.
That was the end of breastfeeding for me and my eldest daughter.
I never thought she would listen so readily, so I learned the amazing nature of children. Children feel and understand everything.
It was an event that made my heart tremble.

3. Breastfeeding was a "game" and an "amulet"

Breastfeeding was a part of life. When I came home from work, when I woke up in the morning, before going to sleep. I think it was more of a "play" time for the two of us to cherish each other than a time to provide nutrition.

Also, I was saved by it. How much the breastfeeding time healed me when I was feeling unwell or exhausted after a night shift. The reverse is also true; even if the child had a fever, she would still breastfeed, so the anxiety that she wasn't eating disappeared.

5. Planning for a "weaning" you won't regret

I think there will be no regrets if you value "how to stop" more than "when to stop."
Breastfeeding is not about lacking nutrition or just increasing the burden on the mother.
Continuing it thinly and for a long time has benefits for both sides.

As an example of an actual weaning method:
• Countdown on the calendar: Children are strong with visual information. By putting a sticker on the calendar saying "Bye-bye on this day," the child begins to prepare their heart in their own way.

• Message to the breast: On the last day, draw an Anpanman picture on a bandage, stick it on the nipple, and say "Bye-bye." This becomes a ritual like a "graduation ceremony" for the child.

• 1-month grace period: It is ideal to spend one month not only adjusting secretion but also for the "mental organization" of mother and child.

Here, all milk is drained out with a few massages.
How to stop is different for everyone.
There are also times when you have to stop due to unavoidable circumstances such as medical treatment. That is by no means a bad thing, and the health of the mother and child is the top priority.

6. Breastfeeding is interesting

Breastfeeding teaches us that children deeply understand our words and situations.
Is there any other time that is this fun and precious?
It is true that there are times when it is painful and brings tears, but I am so grateful to my child for breastfeeding.
I think, "Thank you for making me a mother..."
I have ended up telling a tearful story, but
I also hear funny stories.
I sincerely hope that these will become happy memories of child-rearing.

As a midwife in the back of your mind, I want to walk alongside you so that your "breastfeeding story" can come to a happy conclusion with a smile🌱