It's not about what people say, but what do I want to do?

Coaching is ultimately just a means, not an end.

I was overwhelmed with emotion after receiving comments on the note I wrote yesterday from none other than Natsumi Kasahara (love her♡) and Hiroomi Sueyoshi (my mentor at heart♡). (I'm still a bit too full of emotion to reply yet, but I will soon...!)

The fact that people I see as incredibly successful and feel are so far away said they are "rooting for me" means that even these two amazing people have gone through similar experiences.

If that's the case, maybe I don't need to be so down.

Maybe it's only natural that an article I agonized over and finally worked up the courage to publish gets no reaction, or that a service doesn't sell, or that I drift apart from someone who used to support me.

Yesterday, I had tea with a teacher who holds yoga workshops for the first time in a while.

At first, I went to experience her class, and in a way, we might have been teacher and student, but yesterday she invited me, saying, "Eri-chan, why don't we go to that cafe you said you were interested in together?", and we were completely just friends having tea.

(What kind of relationship is this? Where does the customer end and the friend begin? Where does money come into play?)

(Conversely, if I meet for free with someone who says they want to see me, that's basically me losing my own customers... hmm, I end up applying everything to myself and worrying about it.)

(I'm not good with ambiguity.)

Taking everything seriously and honestly is both my strength and my weakness.I want someone to set the rules.That's why, honestly, the era of 'everyone, let's wear masks!' was easier.

(Nowadays, there are people who feel like 'Are you still wearing a mask?', while many of my in-person session clients are just as worried as I am, so they might say, 'Oh? Everyone at my workplace is still wearing masks.' It's good to have freedom, but it's exhausting how the reactions are so incredibly different depending on who I meet.)

***

I've digressed, but after talking with my yoga teacher, I thought,maybe I had become too fixated on coaching..

How should I put it? I really realized that it's important to talk to people who are neither coaches nor clients (I still haven't gotten used to these terms and they feel awkward, so we were talking about how it would be nice to have a name for the people who gather around Eri-chan).

The more I learn about coaching, the more interesting it becomes, and I have nothing but empathy for the stance of'not giving advice' and 'the answer lies within yourself'.

However, no matter how many people are offering coaching on social media, and even if it seems like there's an unprecedented coaching boom,I don't think saying 'I do coaching' to the general public conveys anything at all.

Therefore, I must convey what I offer in my own words.

I realized that by absorbing knowledge, I had become lazy, or rather, quite biased in that regard.

I had been complacent, assuming that 'I do coaching' would get the message across somewhere.

Yesterday, too, when R-san (the yoga teacher) listened to me a lot and asked me many questions, I said things like, 'That's a great question. That's exactly coaching.'...

The other person didn't even intend to do that, you know. Haha.

Even though we were just having tea and chatting normally,I started seeing every conversation with people as a coaching techniqueand began viewing things by applying it!!

What is this, withdrawal symptoms?

I think I'll distance myself from 'coaching' until I can look at things in a good way. (Even though I love it.)

It's just that, when you're around people who take 'coaching' for granted, like practicing sessions within a course or interacting with peers, it had become second nature.

No, that's not right! That would make us exactly like the kind of group that only gets excited among themselves and doesn't accept outsiders!! (I've been an outsider so many times... and yet, I'm supposed to be on the side of people who don't fit in.)

“Isn't what you want to do, Eri-san, called mentoring?”

When I was told that, I felt like maybe that's true, but it also feels like coaching, and I'm just so confused! For now, the word that feels most right when I say it out loud is support...but support for what? That's how I feel.

I guess I'm still not able to put my own services into words or reach out to the people I want to deliver them to.

For someone discovering me for the first time on Note, they must be wondering, what does coaching actually do for me? And honestly, is there even a need for it...

“A sense of familiarity and an aura that makes people feel like they can talk to me about anything, even though we've just met”

was supposed to be my selling point, but perhaps by calling myself a life coach, I've made the barrier feel a bit too high, or maybe it's just not clear what I want to do.

So, I'm thinking of changing my Instagram account name.

I'm thinking about it, but I currently lack the ability to concisely express what I do—conveying praise points tailored to each individual, supporting dream realization, and delivering words and illustrations.

Because I try to fit into existing titles and naming conventions,because I've been clinging to them for security, that's how I ended up here.

Huh? That's right, I mean, what was it that I wanted to do again?

Actually, when I started Atelier Sunao, I just wanted to be someone who listens to stories. Because I believed that alone was enough value.

But before I knew it,

• I shouldn't charge high prices unless I add value

• I don't have the capacity to listen to so many people, so I have to do XX

• I can't come up with the right words on the spot, and I like taking notes and summarizing things with illustrations, soI'll use all my sensibilities to create a service!

Well, as a result of the realizations I had while doing it, the positive feedback I received, and reading books on monetization to make improvements, I've become lost.

When I named my studio Atelier Sunao and actually tried just listening to people, I found that, contrary to my expectations, I couldn't just silently listen to others.

I couldn't help but want to tell you, who have completely lost your confidence, that you have such wonderful qualities!

When I tried to write that down in a notebook, I could only come up with elementary school-level names like "Complimenter" or "Letter Writer"...

I initially imagined doing something like counseling, but I realized that it's a completely different field and not something I should do half-heartedly. (Because there are many people among my clients who have studied it properly.)

If so, what is my service? Oh, it's called coaching! It actually had a proper name!!

With that feeling, I, who find it easier to follow established rules when categorized, have chosen my current form, but...

The more I listened to various people's opinions, and the more I saw others doing similar activities on social media, the more confused I became.

I waver so easily; I have no core of my own. My footing is unsteady and my inner self isn't aligned, which is why my days are so unsettled.

From now on, I will be conscious of not taking in every word from others and reducing the amount of information I input.

Let's go back to basics.

Regarding my service and masks, what is it that I really want to do?

Setting aside the effectiveness, I caught it last year and it was incredibly painful, and I don't want to catch it again if I can help it... If that's the case, isn't it fine to just say, "I'm still worried, so I want to wear a mask in crowds"?

Isn't it fine if it's for self-defense and gives me peace of mind? Even if some people might smile bitterly at me.

I want to meet this person, so I will. I don't want to meet that person, so I won't. Isn't that fine?

Once again, I will look back at the words and survey responses from those who have used my services until now, and remind myself: why did they want to talk to me?

And then, while accepting my own spineless self that wavers easily because of what someone said,, even so, once more, again and again...

I will re-examine, "Whose side do I want to be on, and for what purpose do I want to provide Atelier Sunao?."

Announcement 📢

𖧷𖧷 I'm going to try being a letter writer 𖧷𖧷

This isn't about whether there's a need for it or anything like that; I'm just doing it because I purely want to try running a 'letter-sending service' 💌 lol

I don't really understand effective advertising or marketing, so for now, I'm thinking of letting those who have registered for my Official LINE Account know that 'the cart is open 🛒'!

https://lin.ee/vbdc3XA

However, I'm not interested in those who take a free gift and immediately block me, or those who are just messing around, as that makes me sad!

My goal, the world I want to create, is to build a gentle world where I can support small steps together with the deep and close members who love Eri Hoshina's sensibilities 😌🙏