[Finished Reading] #110 "Rebirth Clown"

"Rebirth Clown"

Author: Kazuya Fukumoto

I still remember the moment I found "Rebirth Clown" at the Literature Flea Market.

I was drawn to the title and drawn to Mr. Fukumoto, so I did a double-take and turned back just as I was about to walk past.
Seeing the book I was holding, he called out to me, "I've bought almost all of those too!" he said.

I love the Literature Flea Market because of moments like this.
It feels less like buying a book and more like bringing home the warmth of a person.

I also absolutely loved the title.

"Rebirth" and "Clown".

Are they broken, are they laughing, or are they trying to recover?
It feels like a mix of everything.

Apparently, he mixes kanji and katakana for his titles, and it made me want to copy him.

And when you read it, this book really proceeds with that exact same temperature.

Of course, the topic of divorce comes up.
But that's not the only charm of this book.

If anything,

Brussels sprouts. Convenience store sweets.
Unwashed dishes. A Margiela ring I started wanting.
The random puns that pop up.

Those "parts that aren't the main thread of life" are incredibly good.
Or maybe, they are the essence.

What I liked was the way this person "shifts" things.

or,

and so on.

It makes no sense, yet it makes perfect sense.
They are my favorite kind of puns.

This book is like this the whole way through—suddenly rhyming, or having words come at you from strange angles. But it’s not just for show.

Because these words truly come from everyday life, they sink in in a strange way.

Also, reading this book made me think.

That a diary isn't something for writing down 'special things'.

It's actually the opposite.

Things like getting a little excited at a convenience store,
nights when you felt lonely for no reason,
or a ring you wanted for no particular reason.

Maybe it exists to keep us from letting those small emotions slip away.

Personally, the one sentence I liked the most was this one.

It’s incredibly good.

I realized that conversation isn't about 'singing the same song'.

Someone who truly listens to the other person's melody and harmonizes comfortably right beside them.
That is a real act of kindness.

What’s more, I liked the sense of distance—not wanting to be the one in front, but wanting to be the one ringing out right next to them.

'Rebirth Clown' isn't a story about dramatically turning your life around.

Rather, it’s a diary about continuing to live a normal life, even while stumbling a bit. That’s why it was good.

You get properly depressed, and you properly laugh.
You worry about trivial things, and you suddenly play with strange words.

All of that is very human.

While reading, I thought many times, 'I wish I could write a diary like this.' Even though there are truly sad things, the writing is somehow pop, light, and a little playful.

But deep within that lightness, there is a real life. I think I just really like that kind of diary.

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