The Challenge of Nutritional Therapy and the Mismatch [The Days We Couldn't Eat Anymore ④]

As I wrote in the previous article,
our dining table had somehow changed into
a place that
confronted me with a sense of helplessnessfor me,
and a place that
forced my son to endure thingsfor him.

"I have to get some nutrition into him."

Driven by that impatience,
I began to research desperately.

In that process, I came across
the books by psychiatrist Dr. Tokumi Fujikawa.

The first one I picked up was

"Improvement Through Diet! Developmental Disorders in Children (Lack of Protein and Iron Erodes Children)"

Having just received an ASD diagnosis,
with no medication, no access to support,
and the reality that nothing had changed
despite finally getting a diagnosis,
I was impatient, and this title
seemed like a salvation to me.

If it can be improved through diet,
I can do it too!!
I have to do it!!

I was driven by something like a sense of mission.

After that, I
“Anyone Can Understand: You Can Cure All Your Ailments Yourself (Illustrated Edition)”

“Depression-Erasing Meals: Your Mind and Body Will Feel Light in No Time If You Get Plenty of Protein and Iron!”

and read them one after another,
plastering them with sticky notes.

At the time, although he hadn't been diagnosed,
my son's conditionlooked like 'depression'.

Seeing him depressed both morning and night,
his energy being drained away,
I was desperate to find some way to help.

The possibility that nutritional deficiency in the brain (especially protein and iron) might be the cause of his poor health
wasthe very hope I needed in my confusion.

Every time I read through the books,
I became absorbed in the idea that if I changed this,
my son might be able to change.

However, reality was not so kind.

The'recommended amounts'written in the books
were so massive that
for my son, who wouldn't eat anything
from morning until evening,
they were distant figures.

He isn't even getting half of the recommended amount.
With an amount like this,
will it really have any effect...

That anxiety and sense of despair
never left my mind.

Even so,
'It might be better than doing nothing,'
I thought, and with a desperate feeling,
I kept recommending supplements and protein shakes.

Before I knew it, I had ended up as
a nagging, troublesome middle-aged woman
obsessed with nutritional management.

The Night of Collapse

One day,
seeing him unable to eat despite being at a growing age,
and watching him
look at me with a suspicious face and try to escapewhenever I brought out supplements or protein shakes,
my anxiety and sadness exploded.

'Just take the supplements at least!!!!'

When I raised my voice,
he just hung his head with teary eyes
and said.

'I can't drink them. It's impossible...'

Seeing those words and his exhausted face,
I was struck by a realization.

What he wanted most
'nutrition'as a substance, but perhaps
a sense of
'safety'where his own senses were not threatened.

The knowledge and obsession I had poured into him,
thinking it was for his own good,
had ironically only cornered him.

I finally began to realize
that my approach
was not a good fit for my son.

Searching for the Exit of the Maze

I have no intention of
denying Dr. Fujikawa's nutritional therapy.

I believe that by changing what we consume,
we can improve
various ailments,
including mental health.

However, the problem in our home
could not be solved by the simple equation that if you balance your nutrition, everything will improve."

Or rather,
even though I started it with a desperate hope,
he couldn't even consume enough nutrition to be balanced according to the equation
.

His condition is not just "picky eating."

The fear of the physical sensation of "feeling sick."

The
feeling of suffocation and nausea that strikes while eating.

If such sensory hypersensitivity was
restricting his diet
to this extent...

And so, I
gradually took my eyes off the nutrition books
and began to
look directly at my son again.

However, the nutrition science I learned
was by no means wasted.

The amount of food he can eat in a day is only 1.5 meals.

I pack as much
protein and iron into that as possible.

I serve
protein at the beginning of his afternoon snack time.

Choosing
cheese or grilled fish cakes for snacks,
those efforts tailored to my son
continue to this day.

And so, I decided to take the maze of

"being unable to eat" that could not be solved from the perspective of nutrition to a mental health clinic.

Continued in Part 5: Diagnosis by a Specialist and the "Concrete Countermeasures" I Chose