On Days When the Grass on the Other Side Looks Too Green

When I look at social media, I sometimes feel envious of those who are married, or dazzled by those who work freely, or when I see people who seem to be loved by so many,

"I wish I were them."

I find myself thinking.

There are days when the grass on the other side looks too green.

In the past, I was always looking for what I was missing.

If only I had more money.

If only I had more confidence.

If only I were younger.

If only I had my life more together.

I would surely be happy.

Thinking that way, I kept counting only the things I didn't yet have.

But no matter how hard I tried, if I only looked at what was missing, a new 'lack' would always be born within my heart.

Even if I obtained one thing, I would then just want something else.

I was supposed to be working hard to become happy, but before I knew it, I had been denying my current self all along.

At times like that, I walk through nature.

I watch the trees swaying in the wind. I look at the small flowers blooming at my feet. I listen to the voices of the birds. I watch the clouds slowly change shape as they drift across the sky.

In nature, nothing is trying to catch up to anyone else.

A tree doesn't blame itself just because it can't grow taller than the tree next to it.

A flower doesn't envy the color of another flower and stop blooming.

Small grasses and large trees alike are living their own lives in their own places.

I don't think connecting with nature is just about looking at beautiful scenery.

It's about remembering that I wasn't born to compare myself to others, but that I am a life that helps make up this world.

On screens, only the beautiful parts of someone's life are cut out and streamed.

But in nature, there are not only blooming flowers, but also withered leaves. There are rainy days, and there are winters where nothing sprouts.

Even so, nature never calls any season a failure.

Even in times when it seems like nothing is happening, beneath the soil, the next life is quietly preparing.

Perhaps we are actually the same.

Even on days when you feel like you are falling behind others, or during periods when you feel like you haven't achieved anything, it doesn't necessarily mean your life has stopped.

In places unseen, a wounded heart may be healing little by little, or the roots of a new self may be quietly stretching through the dark soil.

That is why, whenever I feel distressed from comparing myself to others, I try to look up at the sky.

Acknowledge the sensation of the wind touching your skin. Feel the ground beneath your feet. Return to your own breathing, here and now.

Then,

"I have nothing."

In the heart that once thought this, the things that are actually there slowly return.

Legs that can still walk today.

Skin that feels the wind.

Ears that can hear the birds singing.

Memories of laughing with someone.

Being able to eat warm food.

The self that has walked so far.

And a heart that has not yet given up on wishing for happiness.

Of course, that doesn't mean you have to be satisfied with what you have now and abandon your wishes.

I want to get married.

I want to be loved.

I want to be wealthy.

I want to work in a way that is true to myself.

It is okay to hold onto those wishes.

It is okay to feel envious.

It is okay to have days when seeing someone else's happiness makes your heart ache.

You don't have to blame yourself for that.

Just because you haven't obtained something yet, you don't have to pretend that the life you have right here, right now, doesn't exist.

On days when the grass on the other side looks too green, instead of staring at someone else's garden, try crouching down to look at your own feet.

There, you might find flowers that have been blooming unnoticed, or buds that have quietly begun to grow.

Connecting with nature isn't just about going to a distant forest.

It's about stopping the comparisons for a little while and touching the life that is here, right now, once again.

We are not outside of nature.

Even on days when you feel lost, in seasons when you feel withered, or in moments when you think you have nothing, you have been living within this vast nature from the very beginning.

And I believe that we ourselves are also a part of nature, quietly waiting for our time to sprout.

Whenever you feel down from comparing yourself to others, come back here and read this.

Because at your own feet, there are small buds you haven't noticed yet, and they are truly alive.