Compass for 'How to Live' Vol. 20
Three good things.
Hello everyone! This is paper counselor Yoshiyuki.
This time, I'd like to talk about 'three good things.' You might be wondering, 'What's that?' It's also known as 'three good things,' and it's simple to do. Just write down three good things that happened that day. If you find that too troublesome, just recall them. That's all there is to it.
The effects are said to include improved stress resistance and increased feelings of happiness.
Humans instinctively pay attention to things that feel 'off' or out of place. This is a remnant from the days when we were hunters, an instinct to protect ourselves when, for example, a dangerous animal was nearby. Looking at it another way, we tend to focus on unpleasant, painful, or difficult things, and by dwelling on them, we might even overestimate them compared to reality.
Fortunately, in modern society, we don't encounter wild beasts in our daily lives. Thus, this instinct to focus on things that feel 'off' often works to our disadvantage. 'Three good things' acts as a reset for this.
At the end of the day, when you go to bed, write down or recall three good things that happened that day. If you are recalling them, I think it's particularly effective to do this when you are getting sleepy and your consciousness is drifting. It's a great time to imprint them into your subconscious. I sometimes end up falling asleep while doing it, though. (laughs)
Why does such a simple thing improve stress resistance and happiness?
It is said that it changes the brain's circuitry. If left to our instincts, we tend to focus on the negative, making life feel harder and more painful than it actually is. But when you apply this reset, you can even start to feel that you can live your life in a way that is commensurate with reality, or even happily.
This is a bit of a technical topic, but the brain has a structure called the 'Reticular Activating System' (RAS), which has the function of only taking in information that you are conscious of. For example, if you are driving and running low on gas, your brain receives a command to 'find a gas station.' Suddenly, you start noticing gas stations that were in your field of vision all along but that you hadn't paid attention to. It's not that gas stations suddenly increased in number. It's that your brain decided they were necessary and started looking for information about them. The human brain has this kind of function.
Actually, if you use this Reticular Activating System well, it can also lead to making your dreams come true. That's a long story, so I'll skip it for now.
Also, there are 'three-line diary' products sold, which aim for the same effect. Another way to do it is to post to a private social media account.
Look, if you feel that life is hard, painful, or boring, just give it a try. Nothing will change if you don't do anything. Plus, it's easy to do.
However, there is one thing to keep in mind. It takes time to feel the effects. In my case, it took about a year to notice the results, but this varies from person to person. It is said that if you continue for 21 days, it becomes a habit, and once it's a habit, you won't need to put in any effort.
And another thing: happiness isn't something that is given to you. You have to go find it yourself. There are people who say they are 'unhappy' even though happiness is right in front of them. They just can't see it. Achieving your desires isn't the only form of happiness. Whether or not you realize that is a major point, isn't it? Is what's there invisible, or can you see it? Is your sensitivity to feeling happiness low, or is it high?
This time, I talked about 'three good things.'
Thank you for staying with me until the end.