258. Even if you don't change yourself, the world changes when the people around you change!
1. That's right, you don't even have to change yourself!
Encounters with people—everyone inevitably meets others. On the other hand, we part ways, and keep parting ways. However, there are times when life is entirely determined by the encounters between people.
For example, if your life is painful, you will always be surrounded by people who are also in pain. If you are happy, you are surrounded by happy people.
Happiness is the same.
Happy people gather around happy people.
For example, if you are currently seeing someone, your world becomes defined by that person and you. If you see someone else, your world changes into a different one.
In this way, the world can change depending on the people you associate with.
Of course, if you associate with strange or unpleasant people, that world becomes an unpleasant one. If you associate with people who cherish you, you can change into a happy world.
Some people often say, 'If you change yourself, the other person changes, and the world changes,' but you can also 'change the world by having the other person change, even if you don't change yourself.'
Yes, life can change so easily just by changing the people you associate with.
2. How to choose a fun life
A person's life changes depending on who they meet.
It is the same whether that person is someone you don't like or someone you have affection for.
People who meet influence each other.
However, you must choose the people you meet.
If you ask how to choose, it must be a relationship where you can both have mutual respect.
If one side holds hostility, malice, or if it is a relationship where you use each other for your own benefit, there is a risk of losing the meaning of the encounter.
Choosing people means choosing your life.
Coucou has lived right in the middle of a hyper-competitive society.
Indeed, I chose that life myself.
My surrounding friends and acquaintances were all the same type, a group of young people trying to climb to the top.
The main goal was how to earn, how to profit, and how to become famous. In some parts, I was able to reach those goals, but on the other hand, the things I lost were dozens of times greater.
It was just like a life where swindlers and brokers flock together, searching for prey. Such clusters form in money-worshiping societies.
It was the same mechanism as 'birds of a feather flock together.'
Liars gather with liars.
Playboys gather with playboys. The rich gather with the rich, and the poor with the poor. Just as false love gathers with false love, we choose our lives unconsciously.
In this way, people are drawn, even without realizing it, to those who are convenient for them, those who say things that are pleasant to hear, and those who listen well to what they have to say.
Yes, because it is easier to believe in understanding and empathy.
Even so, why is it that you don't feel happy, find things boring, or cannot become happy? It is because you have chosen the wrong people.
In a relationship with someone you can mutually respect and with whom you can be honest and caring, such questions do not arise.
Being together makes you feel calm, secure, free from anxiety, at peace, and allows you to spend pleasant time. These are the people we must choose.
Choosing people is choosing your life.
It is changing the life you have had until now.
You influence each other, and you can completely transform your life after that encounter.
Coucou tried changing into that kind of life.
3. People are not alone; there are many people behind them.
There was a man named Joe Girard who became America's top salesman and was called the 'God of Sales' based on his own theory that 'there are always at least 30 people behind every person.'
After drifting through various jobs, Girard began working in the funeral and wedding industry, where he learned that for every single person, whether at a wedding or a funeral, at least 30 people—family, friends, and acquaintances—would always gather.
Treating every customer with the mindset that valuing one person meant valuing at least 30 others, Girard built an infinite network of contacts and earned enormous profits.
He also discovered that like attracts like: kind people attract kind people, and scammers attract similar types—birds of a feather flock together.
After learning this law, he stopped forcing himself to associate with everyone and instead expanded his network to include people who understood him, people he could respect, people who valued him, and people who were kind and honest.
Therefore, he proved that you don't need to associate with many people; if you cherish your encounter with just one person, and respect and value that one person, your destiny will change.
He called this the 'Girard Law'.
Also introduced in 'YES short story 255'.
4. What is 'Suki' (Like)?
The world of these note articles is full of 'Suki' (Likes).
But coucou has been thinking about what 'Suki' actually means.
After all, you can't just say 'I like you' to someone's face; it takes a bit of courage.
For example, if it's food, an actor, or a singer, you can easily say 'I like that food' or 'I like this actor'.
You can say 'I like' things like these note articles without any embarrassment. But I can't say 'I like you' to the person in front of me because it's embarrassing, and even if I did, the other person might dislike coucou.
That's why coucou can't say 'I like' so easily.
But it's easy to say in a note article...
But you know, 'Suki' just means 'I like you,' it's not necessarily a 'confession of love,' right? 'I like you, but that doesn't mean I want to date you or marry you.' That's true, indeed.
However, coucou hasn't been told 'I like you' very often, so I'm afraid I might start fantasizing if someone said that to me (all men misunderstand these things).
But, if you write 'Suki' in kanji, it is '好き'.
If you write 'Kirai' (dislike) in kanji, it is '嫌い'.
Strangely, both have the 'woman' radical.
Both 'like' and 'dislike' involve women.
So coucou looked it up.
According to Heibonsha's 'Joyo Jikai' (Dictionary of Common Characters), for '好' (Like):
'A compound ideograph. A shape combining a woman and a child. (Omitted) It is likely a character that originally referred to a mother loving her child. (Omitted) From the meaning of a mother's love for her child, it came to mean 'beautiful' in appearance, and 'intimate,' referring to a state where everything is in good condition. It is also used to mean 'to prefer' something that is in good condition.'
For '嫌' (Dislike):
'A phono-semantic character. (Omitted) The phonetic component is 'ken'. 'Ken' is a shape of holding two stalks of rice in one hand. (Omitted) Holding two together, compared to taking only one stalk, likely implies that something is insufficient or unsatisfactory. (Omitted) The meaning of being unsatisfactory or unfulfilled was transferred to human relationships as 'iya' (dislike). Thus, 'iya' came to mean 'to dislike' a person.'
In Taishukan's 'Kangorin' dictionary:
'好' has almost the same explanation as in 'Joyo Jikai'.
'Ken' means to combine. It expresses the meaning of doubting or disliking, derived from the heart being split between two things and not being at peace.'
That is the explanation.
As the word 'ryoko' (good condition) suggests, it is certainly not a word with a bad meaning.
'Like' changes, and even if you 'like' someone, it can change to 'dislike,' and above all, 'like' means something different to each person.
This is coucou's personal opinion, but I imagine that 'like' is an expression of 'goodwill,' and while it may include affection, it also refers to respecting the other person and both parties being in a better state.
'Suki' is something you send out from yourself, surely.
That's why it makes me happy when the number of people I like increases.
That's why coucou is showering everyone with 'likes'!
It's coucou.
Greetings, everyone!
I might be the type of person who misunderstands things when I receive a 'like' from everyone. Why? Because I get so happy and excited that I start to 'love' the people who gave me a 'like'—I'm a delusional person who jumps to conclusions.
That's why the backlash is also significant...
A long time ago, my seniors kept strictly teaching me, 'Change yourself! Don't ever think about changing others!'
I was also constantly told that in both work and friendships, 'If you change yourself, the other person will change too.'
But you know, I tried my hardest to change myself, yet nothing changed at all. Then, I was scolded, saying, 'Your effort is not enough!'
So, I always kept reflecting on how my efforts were insufficient.
But even then, nothing changed...
That's when I decided to give up.
Actually, it would have been better to give up sooner, but I spent quite a number of years on it.
I decided to cut ties with that nagging, strict senior.
Because of that, I was resented quite a bit.
And then, I met a different senior.
Then, my worldview completely changed...
They were a very kind senior, and just being with them put my heart at ease. Small acts of consideration. They were very kind to someone like me.
Yes, just by changing the people I associated with, my world changed, and my life changed.
Since then, every day has become very enjoyable, and meeting not only that senior but also their friends has become a fun daily routine.
Yes, there is no need for me to change.
It's a lie to change yourself to suit others.
Friends who are honest with themselves and accept the real me.
That is a very happy thing.
Yes, you just need to change the people you associate with.
Yes, I was able to change the world easily!
Everyone,
thank you for reading this far!
See you again tomorrow!
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A story to make life fun, bright, and happy.
