It is quite a back-breaking story.

"Seriously, you always manage to mess something up wherever you go," "You are truly clumsy," "What did you mess up this time?," "Troublemaker." Hello, I am Norimaki, and these are things I tend to hear from my family and friends (mainly Shime-chan) every time I go out somewhere.


I was planning to write about camping, but for some reason, I am currently at an orthopedic clinic. Explaining to the receptionist and nurses why I ended up here is embarrassing every single time, so I have been imagining writing a summary of the incident on paper, laminating it, and hanging it around my neck.

This time, I went on a two-person camping trip for the first time in over two years, but I messed up on the very first day.
We drove to a campsite deep in the mountains, and thanks to the car, it was easy because we didn't have to be desperate to reduce our luggage, but the fact that camping with a car tends to lead to bringing unnecessary things might be a distant cause of this incident.
Anyway, I packed all sorts of things into the car that I wouldn't bring on a solo camping trip.
For example, a tongue drum.
I bought it after being drawn to the tone played by a traveler sitting next to me on a beach in Goa, India, but it is a round object that is usually just interior decor. I brought it to remember that this thing is an instrument for the first time in a while.

By the way, as soon as we arrived, I kept playing the children's song "Furusato" and "Nichiyoubi yori no Shisha" on the tongue drum endlessly, but my partner was busy gathering firewood far away, so it was good that we could each spend time in a state of nothingness.

Then, there was the hammock I bought in Thailand.
It was an item that hadn't had a turn for years because there was never a good time to use it, but since it was a two-person camping trip, I brought it along, and we decided to set up the hammock right after pitching the tent.
My partner, who knows how to tie knots that are tight and won't come undone, tied it tightly to a thick tree branch, so I decided to swing in the hammock in high spirits.
Even though they are my travel partner, I am a heartless person who doesn't completely trust others, so I carefully checked the strength of the tree and the knot with my own eyes. Hmm. I checked that it would be fine, and then I tried getting on the hammock.
Nice.
It reminds me of the hammock that was in a house in a village deep in the mountains of Thailand. I remember swinging in a hammock while looking at the mountains and drinking a Chang beer.

I miss the mountains of Thailand.
While thinking back on past travels, I enjoy a brief moment of relaxation.
Then suddenly, I didn't know what happened, but before I knew it, I fell from my buttocks onto the ground and hit it hard, and it resonated through my brain at high speed, and I received an impact as if I had been punched hard by a Thai boxer. It was an electric-like shock, as if I had been punched in the buttocks and a blue lightning bolt had run through my head. Of course, accompanied by intense pain.
I can see the sun through the gaps in the trees.
It's dazzling.
Why.
Why can't my body move at all?
Everything hurts.
I only hit my buttocks, but I can't breathe.
Ah.
Goodbye...
That's the feeling.
A few seconds later,
"It hurts! My butt hurts! It's stinging! I can't move! It hurts!" A persistent scream echoed through the campsite with a time lag.
It was a weekday and there were few people, which was a relief, but according to my partner, someone who had been watching the whole thing nearby was standing there stunned with their hand over their mouth. I hope it doesn't become a trauma for that person.
The cause of the incident was that the tree branch and the knot were strong enough, but the hammock itself had deteriorated and snapped.
Before I stop trusting others, I should stop overestimating myself, and I realized that I should probably lose a little more weight. It was a real realization, the serious kind accompanied by pain. I think the success rate of my next diet is quite high.
Then, I don't remember well, but we took ice out of the cooler box where we were cooling steak meat and Kumano beef yakiniku, put it in a plastic bag, and used it to take turns cooling the meat on my buttocks.
I think the ice was also surprised. It was unexpected that ice would be used to lower the temperature of my buttocks.
Large, lumpy blocks of ice were placed inside my pants, and until the sun went down, I lay face down on a cot (a simple bed used inside a tent), and as the ice melted, it was replaced with new ice, and that's how time just flowed quietly.
After that, we didn't go home and camped for two nights as planned. On the second day, when I took Loxonin, the pain became manageable, and I got carried away and went into the river up to my shoulders to play even though it was October in Japan, and at Kawayu Onsen, where hot water springs up if you dig in the riverbed, I dug in the riverbed to warm up in the hot spring, and established a skillful double-use style of soaking only my buttocks in the river and my feet in the hot spring, and spent time chilling out in that position. It was fun, so I want to write about it in detail again, but I'll omit it for now.
Although the inflammation subsided after cooling, warming, and cooling, it still hurts after 3 days, so I came to the hospital. Yes, that is the background of why I am here now.

It's embarrassing, complicated, and I don't feel like explaining all that at length to the nurses and doctors at the hospital.
When I explained it in an abbreviated version, the doctor asked me detailed questions, cutting me off, such as "How high was that hammock?," "Where did it snap?," "How much time was there between it snapping and you falling?," "Did you think 'I'm falling!'?," "Did you tense your buttocks?"
I was annoyed, thinking this doctor was asking out of curiosity, wanting to expose and despise a woman in her 40s playing recklessly outdoors.
Because the last time I was examined by this doctor was during the incident when I fell in the middle of a street in Cuba and put my hand out, breaking my elbow bone, but after that, I hustled at a salsa party without knowing it was broken, and when I returned to Japan, I realized it was a big deal because my arm wouldn't move at all, which led to my visit. It is my sanctuary of bone versions.
My wrist was aching, so I thought it was a wrist fracture, but it was quite a rare incident where my elbow was snapped. It was a snap of a break.
The history of that rare incident was written carefully in my medical record, and the doctor, who shouldn't have, read the medical record carefully again and politely remembered the Cuba incident. It was careful and polite.
Well, if I were such a patient, I would also want to ask questions, "What on earth did you mess up this time without learning your lesson?" But does that have anything to do with it? Leave me alone, this time it's not Cuba, it's COVID weight gain, you have any complaints? I, who had a sore butt, was sulking in my heart and giving evasive answers, but the doctor's questions were very persistent.
However, there was a proper reason for the persistent questions.
According to the doctor, when you know you are going to fall and hit the ground, you tense your buttocks, so the bone is protected by the buttock muscles, but if you hit the ground without time to know you are falling, you may fracture the bone without being protected by the muscles.
I see, I was impressed that it was a medically necessary question. And, while thinking, "Sorry, doctor," I told him about the events in detail, including cooling my butt in the river and soaking in the hot spring. The doctor wrote it down in detail in the medical record. It was done...
Then I had an X-ray taken, and I was disappointed to be told that there was indeed a crack in my tailbone. It was indeed disappointing.
By the way, when the doctor told me, "Gas is built up in your stomach, and it's showing up on the X-ray, making the image hard to see," another embarrassment hit me, but I pretended to be someone who isn't bothered by it as the fate of chronic constipation.
I was relieved that it wasn't a spinal compression fracture or pelvic fracture, which I, who have a hernia, was most concerned about, but it was sad to know that neither my buttock muscles nor fat protected my tailbone.
It was a momentary event, so it couldn't be helped this time, but I learned one thing: from now on, when falling from somewhere, no matter how instantaneous it is, I will tense my buttocks immediately to protect my body (tailbone).
Now, as for the treatment for the tailbone fracture, there is no way but to leave it alone.
It seems to be a little better if you tighten a pelvic belt, so I just wear a corset for lower back pain that I have at home and live my life so that things don't hit my tailbone.
For that reason, I stopped by Don Quijote on the way home and bought a donut cushion, also known as a ring cushion. This is good because I can sit without hitting the painful part. It's a wasteful expense, but I bought it because I have no choice. It's a painful expense including the X-ray fee.
I was planning to buy calcium wafers, but I bought a bulk size of my favorite Korean chocolate brownies at Don Quijote. This is also a painful expense.
It is true that you forget the heat once it passes, and the success rate of my next diet is steadily going down again.
Even when an unpredictable situation like a hammock snapping occurs, I can't take action to lose weight. Good grief.

The reason why I have been walking waddling while holding my butt and working while carrying a donut cushion for a while now is because of a crack in my tailbone, not hemorrhoids.
That is also troublesome to explain, so should I really write a summary on paper, laminate it, and hang it around my neck? It's a difficult problem.

I believe that the pain in my butt, being looked at with curious eyes by people, and being asked by various people "What happened?" will gradually fade with time, so for now, I am managing to get by with the explanation that "I was being naughty and cracked my tailbone."
It's an unbelievable explanation, but the people at work don't ask much more than that, so I think the strategy is a success.
I'm curious about what kind of image each person has of "naughty" in their 40s, so I've decided to imagine and enjoy it. Maybe something like pulling out a radish or falling off a balance beam. They probably wouldn't expect that a hammock snapped. I feel like I won somehow.
That aside.
Since my embarrassing history has been firmly recorded in the orthopedic medical record again, I hope I don't have to go to this orthopedic clinic for another rare incident. I think I will buy calcium wafers tomorrow.
It is no exaggeration to say that bones hold the key to how the second half of a woman's life will turn out. Defeat osteoporosis, avoid being bedridden. I live my life thinking that every day.
However, if a woman in her 40s who is not an athlete and doesn't exercise breaks bones at this pace, the outlook is too ominous. Come to think of it, two years before Cuba, there was also an incident where it was discovered at this orthopedic clinic that a part of my instep had a stress fracture and was healing naturally after some time had passed since the end of my Camino trip. This is also a rare incident.
I want to aim to live without breaking any bones as much as possible in the future.
I don't want to grow any taller, so I've lived without drinking much milk, but I feel like I've reached a turning point where I need to think seriously about calcium.
For the sake of a high-QOL life, I am only thinking about such things.
A woman sleeping with a cold pack on her butt. Camping might be impossible for this year. I hope to heal quickly and maybe go around December if it's not too cold yet. Sad. I will be resting for a while.
I think I'll watch Crash Landing on You or Squid Game on Netflix. Everyone, please concentrate all your energy on your buttock muscles when you fall on your butt.