Can you only find the 'worst funerals' through online searches? The dark side of an ad-polluted industry and the one way we can protect ourselves

'I should look for a funeral home online just in case.' 'I'll feel relieved if I have a pre-consultation and get a quote.'

If you are thinking that way, please stop for a moment and read this article.

If you were to get caught up in trouble with 'exorbitant additional charges'or'aggressive upselling' at the very moment you want to send off your loved one and quietly immerse yourself in grief—the sadness would multiply, leaving you with irreparable regret.

In fact, current internet searches and the mechanism of 'pre-consultation' hide aterrifying structural trap where consumers are taken for a ride without even knowing it.

In this article, I will clearly unravel why searching online makes it easy to encounter 'rip-off businesses,' and the 'reliable self-defense measures' we should truly rely on.

1. Why searching online draws you toward 'rip-off businesses'

First, let's look at the 'inconvenient truth' of how the modern funeral industry operates online.

① Companies that can pay for advertising = 'Businesses fully dedicated to making money'

'Funeral,' 'Family funeral cost,' 'Tokyo funeral'.... When you search on your smartphone in an emergency, ads (sponsored slots) and seemingly legitimate comparison sites line up at the top.

I want you to think about this. What kind of company can afford to pay massive advertising costs continuously? It is none other than a 'company that has a mechanism to recover huge profits from customers that exceed the advertising costs.'

Funeral homes that are honest, charge fair prices, and do good work locally on a small scale cannot afford to invest their budget in the IT advertising war and end up buried far down in the search results. In other words, the moment a company is at the top of the search results, the probability that it is a 'giant capital (or intermediary) that puts all its effort into attracting customers and making money' jumps up.

② The 'bait quote' at the entrance and the 'upselling hell' on-site

These ad-savvy businesses are extremely sharp. Because they know the psychology that consumers 'will choose if it's cheap,' they make the initial quote (prices in pamphlets or online) look surprisingly low.

However, this is merely the 'base framework.'

When it comes to the stage where they actually transport the deceased and proceed with the funeral arrangements, they say this:

• 'Your loved one's condition is not very good, so you won't be able to send them off beautifully unless you pay for special treatments and a better coffin.'

• 'Generally speaking, everyone adds these options.'

The bereaved family is in an extreme state of grief and lack of time. They exploit the psychology of 'I must not be disrespectful to the deceased' and 'I want to do things properly,' and launch high-priced upsells (additional charges) one after another on the spot.

'Even if we don't rip off everyone, if we can successfully collect additional fees from 50%, no, 70% of people, we can make a huge profit'—this is the true nature of the ad-driven, intermediary business model.

2. The clever trap of 'online pre-consultation'

Despite these realities, the internet and some self-proclaimed experts say the following:

At first glance, this sounds like plausible advice, but one question arises here: “Why do even decent competitors and industry insiders, who are not unscrupulous operators, insistently recommend online pre-consultation?”

There are two main reasons for this.

1. The 'survival logic' in response to changing times Even for sincere, self-operating funeral homes, there is a defensive aspect where they feel they 'must have an online window to let people know about their sincerity' because consumers have reached a point where they only look for companies online, making a 'wait-and-see' approach unsustainable.

2. Superficial praise of IT without understanding the structure This is a case where people recommend pre-consultation as general business advice, speaking only from the premise that 'the internet is a convenient infrastructure' while remaining unaware of what is happening behind the ads (the corruption of information).

However, sadly, once you press the 'pre-consultation' button while already trapped in the clever marketing funnel (customer lock-in flow) of a rip-off operator, you are merely dancing on their turf.

3. The essence of 'word-of-mouth' is not about aiming for a perfect score

So, how can we protect ourselves? The key here is the old-fashioned filter of 'word-of-mouth' (referrals).

I can hear people saying, 'No, no, in this day and age, we have nuclear families and no neighborhood ties, so we can't use word-of-mouth like that,' but there is a major misunderstanding here.

People in the internet industry want to say, 'Word-of-mouth is old-fashioned, so do a pre-consultation online.' This is because it allows them to drive people to their own platforms (the internet).

However, the 'word-of-mouth' we are talking about does not just refer to neighborhood association presidents or grand local connections.

• Care workers, nurses, and medical professionals

• Colleagues at part-time jobs or workplaces, and acquaintances who are a little older

• People close to you who have recently experienced a funeral for a family member

In this 'web of living human relationships within daily life that are free of conflicts of interest,' real information actually exists.

What is important here is that it does not mean “trying to find the perfect 100-point funeral home through word-of-mouth.” Instead, it means using word-of-mouth as 'the most reliable derivative risk hedge to avoid stepping on the worst rip-off operators (0-point or negative-point operators) after jumping into an ocean of internet ads painted over with advertisements.'

“That funeral home was sincere and didn't try to push unnecessary options on us.” “I know a place that was very supportive when a family member passed away recently.”

There is no screening ability that beats this kind of 'warm, primary information' actually experienced by living human beings. In the world of internet advertising, where information has completely rotted away, real human connections are the only breakwater we have to keep from stepping on a landmine.

4. Summary: Mindset for avoiding becoming an information-vulnerable person

A funeral is an extraordinary event that you don't experience many times in your life. That is precisely why funeral providers are waiting for you, having invested huge amounts in advertising to take advantage of your ignorance and anxiety.

• The more you search online, the more likely you are to get caught on the landing pages of 'high-priced, rip-off providers' who can afford to spend money on advertising.

• Even if you are lured by a low entry price and have a pre-consultation, a structure is in place to trap you in a web of clever upselling (additional charges) on-site.

• Behind the voices saying 'you should search online' often lies the logic of the providers' customer acquisition or an unawareness of the structure.

• That is why, when the time comes, rather than searching for the perfect establishment, following real-life human relationships (word of mouth) to avoid the 'worst landmines' is the most reliable and honest self-defense measure.

The ceremony that colors the end of life must not be turned into a tool for someone else's profit. Do not be swayed by advertisements; cherish the 'human connections' you can truly trust. That is our strongest preparation for surviving in an information society.

Just one last thing.
Knowing the 'realities of the field' like what I wrote today will definitely lower the probability of having regrets at a funeral. But what is even scarier is ending up with a 'funeral home you should never hire'.
Recently, I have been receiving many consultations from people who say, 'I trusted a 300,000 yen family funeral, but I was charged 4 to 10 times that amount.' To reduce that damage even a little, I have created a booklet called'5 Funeral Homes You Should Never Hire'. It is about 40 pages long and specifically describes their characteristics and tactics. I am giving it away for free. If you would like a copy, please apply via this post. →

You can follow me and send a DM, or email is also fine. I will not do any sales calls, so please feel free to receive it.

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