What is my 'core'?

Lately, I've often been
thinking about 'what does it mean to be myself?' 🙄

Childcare.
Family.
Work style.
Human relationships.


When living through various roles every day,
the pressure to 'do things properly' grows without me noticing 💭

But, especially at times like that, I
want to think about 'what is my core?' ✍️

I believe that the 'core' is

the thing at the center of who a person is

🌱

Even if titles or environments change,
it's like a 'spine' that remains deep inside forever 🌈

For example,

* What I want to cherish
* When my heart is moved
* What I feel uncomfortable with
* The moments when I feel 'like myself'

I feel like those things are close to the core 💡

Childcare worker. Mother. Wife.
All are important roles.

But roles and 'my true self' are a little different 🙅‍♀️

When I try too hard at my roles,
sometimes I lose track of 'what do I actually want to do?' 😭

That's why I think
I need time to return to my 'core' periodically ⏳

In psychology,
the word 'core' itself is rarely used, but

* Values
* Self-concept
* Identity
* Personality

are said to be similar concepts 💡

What is often said recently is,


'People tend to feel happiness when they are living in accordance with their own values'

✨

Conversely,
it is also said that if you keep moving away from what you cherish,

* Strong stress
* Feelings of helplessness
* Irritation
* Feelings of self-denial

are likely to follow 📚

When I learned this, it made a lot of sense to me.

I realized that it's precisely because I have things I cherish inside me
that I sometimes feel conflicted 😔

Lately, I have been putting into words what is inside me little by little 📝

I,

* Want to wish for the happiness of those around me
* Want to live with excitement
* Like to make others happy
* Want to keep taking on challenges
* Want to be sincere
* Want to value harmony


I have always held those feelings.


That is precisely why

I get hurt by small lies,
find it painful to keep working in a way that forces me,
and get tired of 'having to do things properly' 🫩

Maybe all of that is when I am misaligned with my core 💦




In the past, I

was very concerned about 'how I am seen by others'

🫨

It hasn't completely disappeared even now.

But recently, I've started to want to cherish these things little by little:

* Am I being kind to my current self?
* Does this excite me?
* Will my future self be happy with this?

✨

Perhaps a core isn't something you find and then you're done,
but rather something you confirm over and over again

through your daily choices.
🔍

In the midst of a busy daily life,
it's easy to put your own voice on the back burner.

🏃‍♂️

That is precisely why I want to be someone

who can properly listen to,“What do I really want to do?”🙂‍↕️