Encouraging and Supporting a Family

Since I started using note, I have begun taking on the challenge of writing in various forms.
Yesterday, I took on one of those challenges: a public submission.
The submission requirements were for an episode about nursing or caregiving.
Having worked as a nurse for a long time, I have accumulated many experiences and failures.
Even though I can immediately recall what kind of patient I had or what I talked about with a patient's family, I sometimes find it difficult to express it in writing.
However, it has led me to take the time to think about what I felt at that moment from among many episodes, and how I feel now that time has passed.

I would like to introduce one of those many episodes.
(This is not the submitted work.)

Patient A was repeatedly hospitalized due to a malignant disease.
Despite the efforts of treatment, the situation shifted toward palliative care.
He was hospitalized because his pain was severe and he could no longer eat.
His parents took turns staying with him every day.
One night.
When I went to Patient A's room, I found his father in the darkness holding an ice cream.
"He said he wanted to eat ice cream, so I bought it, but he fell asleep after one bite. I don't want to eat ice cream at this hour either, but I have no choice," he said, smiling lonely.
Every time a nurse went to check on him, the father was sleeping curled up under Patient A's bed.
Even when I told him, "Please get some rest," he would wake up when we were turning Patient A's body and say, "Thank you."
Seeing that, I felt a lump in my throat, wondering if this was truly the right way to spend the final moments with his son.

I spoke to the mother, who had taken over the stay from the father, saying, "Are you really sure you want to spend his final moments here at the hospital? If your family wants to spend time with Patient A at home, we will do whatever we can to make it happen."
The wishes of the patient, and of course the family, are the most important thing.
We had talked about such things before.
I had the impression that they were unable to make a decision.
I thought I would create an opportunity for them to think about it once more.
Watching over a family member as they pass away is painful. It is not that one family member is more important than another, but watching over one's own child is especially so. Your own child, whom you love, who had so many possibilities, and whose future you looked forward to, is passing away before you.
How painful it must be for the parents.
Wouldn't they want to be by his side for even one more day, one more hour, or one more minute?
And wouldn't their true wish be to spend that family time without having to worry about anyone else?

The next day, the mother confided in me, "What ways are there to go home?"
Putting Patient A's feelings first, the mother, father, and Patient A's younger sister discussed it together and made the choice to go home and spend time as a family.
From there, the attending physician and all the staff arranged for home medical care, visiting nursing, and a care taxi, and explained to the family how to use the device for continuous pain medication infusion.

After the mother confided in me, all the arrangements were made.
Patient A's condition worsened further, and he cried, saying, "My body is so sluggish, now is not the time to go home."
The mother and father told Patient A, "It's okay, Mom and Dad are here," and then firmly told us, "Please proceed with the preparations."

We saw them off with a perfect system in place, where a visiting nurse and a home care doctor would be waiting at their home when the care taxi arrived.

Three days after returning home, Patient A passed away.
During those three days, he met with his high school classmates and even took commemorative photos.
It is said that the family was able to sleep together as a family of four, with Patient A in the middle.

Although I did not meet them directly, the mother came to report that the funeral had ended and said, "If you hadn't asked me back then if I was sure about staying, I might have regretted it now. I am satisfied that we were able to take him home, spend his final moments as a family, and see him off together."

Beyond the work, there is someone precious.
If I think about what is happening in front of me as if it were myself, the things I need to do naturally become clear.

#Let'sTalkAboutWork