The Day I Delivered My 'Thank You' to My Mother

It was 20 years ago, but
there was a time when I suddenly felt a strong sense of gratitude toward my mother.

It was on my birthday,
which came after the birth of my eldest son.

Working as a nurse in a large hospital ward, I had no choice but to work night shifts while pregnant due to staff shortages.

There were other pregnant staff members in the ward, and I couldn't be the only one exempted from night shifts...

While we were all trying to cooperate and get by, my water broke while I was at work, and I was examined at the hospital's obstetrics department where I worked.

I was 32 weeks pregnant at the time.
A life still too small to be born.

I was rushed to a hospital with a NICU (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit) and gave birth to my small son at 33 weeks.


Amidst anxiety,
sadness,
and guilt,

there was joy.


My son needed to stay in the NICU for a month after I was discharged.

It was lonely to be apart, and while feeling guilty that I couldn't take him home with me, I spent my days delivering breast milk to my tiny son sleeping in an incubator.

Every day, I prayed for him to grow up safely.

After that, while struggling with my first experience of child-rearing and night crying, my son grew up healthy and strong.

Born small, my son drank breast milk well and quickly became plump and chubby.

It was on my birthday that arrived during that time.

I suddenly thought,

'Oh, a birthday isn't a day to be celebrated, but a day to thank your mother.'

My mother was a strict person,



and I grew up
without being spoiled
or praised since I was little.
When I was in elementary school, my teacher said,

'Be grateful to your mother who endured pain to give birth to you.'
But,

it seems I was born easily without any trouble,
and she said, 'I almost gave birth in the toilet before reaching the hospital.'

On top of that,
my mother would laugh and say, 'When you were a baby, I was busy chasing after your older brother, and you were easy because you held your own bottle to drink,' so
at the time, I didn't feel any gratitude for my birth.

Even so,

the birth of a life
is not something to be taken for granted,

it is a miracle that one is born safely,

and there must have been
many hardships in raising me afterward.

Having become a mother myself,
I realized that.

So, while holding my son, I called my mother.

I shared my realization that 'a birthday is a day to thank your mother,' and

'Mom, thank you for giving birth to me,'

I couldn't help but say it.

Over the phone,
I could hear my mother's voice tearing up.

To my mother who has since passed away,
I am glad that I was able to properly convey
the honest feelings that overflowed at that time.

To your loved ones,
are you able to convey your feelings of 'thank you'?

It can be embarrassing, but
if you don't say it when you want to,
you might miss the chance and regret it.


Who is the person

you want to thank?