Precious! Mom friends without strings attached

For the first time in about four years since the COVID-19 pandemic, I reunited with seven moms from the swimming class my son attended from the time he was five months old until the end of third grade. We used to chat about trivial things for about an hour once a week while watching our children, and those relationships were quite stress-free. That connection has continued thinly but steadily. And this time, it was just as stress-free as ever. The reason is...

It's great that we go to different schools!

In this group, no one has children attending the same school. Just that alone makes it a bit easier, as there's no risk of stepping on landmines. I'm not exactly well-informed to begin with, and even when I talk to friends from school, I'm usually just a listener and don't really have much to share. Still, I find myself thinking, 'Is it better not to tell this person this story?' or 'Which mom is this person close with again?' It's nice not to have to worry about things like that.

It's great that our ways of thinking are different!

Mom friends I see frequently in my neighborhood often have similar academic expectations, ways of thinking, and lifestyles for their children. While that can be helpful and it's true that we have a lot in common, the friends I met for the first time in a while are completely different in those respects. No matter what I say, I want my son to work hard at his studies, but some of them prioritize club activities over that, or they openly joke about their children not being good at school. In the end, we all agreed that both parents and children should just enjoy life! It was a real eye-opener, and it felt very refreshing.

It's great that our children have no connection!

Even though we are 'mom friends,' our children have no connection now. Even when we talk about our children, if the distance is too close, I sometimes find myself bracing for things like, 'Are they probing me?' or 'Are they comparing us?' Also, there's no risk of unnecessary information being passed on to someone else with a 'Your mom said this.' I realized this time that there are surprisingly few people with whom I have that kind of relationship, and I feel like I've awakened to the joy of being able to talk without thinking about anything...

I might be overthinking it, but since mom friends are friends made through our children, I think there's a unique difficulty to those relationships. There are some people whose relationships I feel have changed a bit now that our children are in junior high school, and I'm just going with the flow and enjoying that, but I feel like mom friends are the kind of friends where there's always a slight sense of tension, even though we are friends.
However, with these mom friends, there's no need for tension. Yet, because we watched over a period of our children's growth, we understand the characters of the children each of us talks about, so we are still mom friends after all. Mom friends without strings attached are precious. I am truly grateful. I hope this relationship continues thinly but steadily.