【Memories of Spring Break】My son, a train enthusiast, made his solo Shinkansen debut at age 8

I didn't set it up specifically, but sometimes my smartphone displays photos from several years ago, and I find myself reminiscing. A few days ago, a photo from five years ago today appeared. Oh... how nostalgic...! My son was still in second grade and had just turned eight. During spring break five years ago, my son traveled alone on the Shinkansen for a little over an hour to the station nearest my parents' house.

A longing for the saying, "Send a beloved child on a journey"

I had heard a story about a cousin's child who, around the time they were starting elementary school, took a highway bus alone to visit their hometown from Tokyo to Yamanashi. I talked to my mother at the time about how amazing the child was, but also how incredible the parents' courage was to send them off! I didn't have children yet, but it stayed in my heart as something "cool..."
After my son was born and became a train enthusiast, we often traveled by train as a family. From the time he entered elementary school, my son wanted to ride the train alone, but I was too scared to let him go. I felt conflicted, remembering, "That child was already going to see his grandparents in another prefecture alone at this age..." but my fear won out, and I couldn't make the decision.
In the winter of my son's second grade, while we were planning for spring break, I suddenly had an idea and asked him as a light joke, "Do you want to try riding the Shinkansen alone to Grandma's house?" My son immediately replied, "I want to go!" No way... My son is a cautious person, after all. I thought he would back out when it came down to it...

Full-scale consultation & research begins! At what age can you ride the Shinkansen alone?

When I told my mother at my parents' house about my son's reaction, she was surprised and said, "Really? It would be amazing if he could come, but think about it carefully." My husband was also skeptical, saying, "Can he really do it...?" However, my son was full of motivation. I told my son, "I said it lightly, so I'll look into it properly. Let me think about it for a bit," and I worried, worried, and worried... I wondered if I could ask the conductor, but when I looked it up, there was no such service. I searched day after day for things like "Shinkansen child only," "Shinkansen alone child," and "elementary school student Shinkansen."
・I can't imagine letting a child go alone. Why not wait until they are older?
・It was possible in the past, but now there are more strange people, so it's dangerous.
・It would be a nuisance if they made noise or had bad manners.
I saw many opposing opinions. Yes, that's true. Fair point. Maybe I should stop... But sometimes, I would also see opinions like this.
・Doesn't it depend on the child?
・If you say it's dangerous because they are small, when will it be okay?
・It's a good experience. It will definitely be an opportunity for growth.
Indeed... Even if I wait until next year or the year after, the day I can confidently say "It's absolutely safe!" for a first-time experience will probably never come. If so, don't I have to let him do it while thinking "Maybe it's okay...?" anyway? When is that? Isn't it now, while my son has the momentum? ...Alright, I'll let him go. After worrying for about a month, I made up my mind.

Is he really okay alone? Careful confirmation and instruction

When I told my son, "You can go," I also told him, "It is a significant challenge for a small child like you to ride the Shinkansen alone. Many people think it's dangerous, and there are many opposing opinions." Even if something happens, neither Mom nor Dad will be there. You have to be responsible and make sure you don't get off at the wrong station. If your manners are bad or you are in danger, usually parents are responsible and get scolded or looked at coldly, but if you go alone, you will be directly reprimanded. It means responsibility comes with it. Are you still okay with that? I confirmed it over and over again, but my son's resolve never wavered even once.

Preparation until the day and the Green Car

It takes a little over an hour from Tokyo Station to the station nearest my parents' house. I decided to see him off to the platform at Tokyo Station and have my mother wait for him on the platform at the destination station. Even though I had instructed him, I chose the Green Car, which has spacious seats, considering the possibility that he might look around or move his body too much in his seat.
I told him repeatedly to ask the conductor, station staff, or nearby adults if anything happened, but to ensure we could contact him directly in an emergency, I had him carry a smartphone for this occasion and practiced communicating via LINE and other methods for a while beforehand.
After a few weeks of "It's totally fine! I'm just sitting there! I'm lucky to be able to ride in the Green Car!" with no anxiety at all, just excitement, the day before, I saw a hint of nervousness in my son for the first time. But he said, "I'm just nervous. I'm fine."

Finally departing! Flustered by an unforeseen situation

On the day, we arrived at the platform about 10 minutes before departure. At first, my son was smiling, but gradually his smile disappeared and he became quiet... I could tell he was quite nervous.
"Alright! Shall we get on the Shinkansen now?"
My son nodded heavily. He had no words and his eyes were teary. Huh? At this late stage? ...But I see... I had become completely reassured by his previous enthusiasm, but when I thought about it, the experience of being "alone" was like a first for him. Of course, he would feel lonely (>_<) While I was also confused, I pretended to be calm, and since he looked so anxious, I saw him off to his seat. The seat next to him was empty.
When my husband and I asked, "Can you go as planned?", he shed big tears. At this point, his loneliness peaked. But he never said anything negative, and the sight of him fighting his own feelings while crying was reliable. Then, my husband and I stepped off the train. At the moment of departure, he kept his red eyes fixed forward and just waved his hand at us. I was moved by the sight of my son facing forward while savoring various feelings. The Shinkansen departed on time.

A perceived 3 hours!? The longest hour or so in history

An unexpected tearful departure. I immediately called my mother and explained the situation. I asked her to be on the platform without delay so she could meet him immediately upon arrival, as he might be crying from anxiety. I had promised to exchange LINE messages with my son occasionally, but even when I sent messages, they weren't marked as read. Is he still crying? Is he bothering the people around him? Is he tired and asleep? Worries kept popping up one after another. The hour or so I spent waiting at Tokyo Station until I received confirmation that he was safe felt like three or five hours.
When the arrival time came, I received a message from my mother and son saying, "He arrived safely." I felt relieved...

How was the second grader's one-hour solo Shinkansen debut?

Me: Son! Were you okay?
Son: Huh? What do you mean? I was just sitting in my seat.
Me: What, wait...! You were crying when you left, right...?
Son: Oh, that. Well, I did get anxious. But I was fine right away.
Me: Did anyone ever sit in the seat next to you?
Son: They did! And you know what, that person started eating a boiled egg halfway through, and they were so fast at peeling the egg! It was really amazing!
Me: ...Huh? ...I see... Can you put Grandma on?
How was it? Did he seem okay?
Mom: He told me he was crying when he left, so I was worried, but he got off smiling right away, and he was totally fine! The moment he arrived, he was super excited, saying the person next to him was so fast at peeling a boiled egg (bursts of laughter). I wasted my time worrying about whether he was crying~
...So, I can't help but feel like saying, give me back my hour, or rather, my perceived three hours! But he arrived safely, so all's well that ends well. Maybe that's just how it is ^^;
The next day, I drove to my parents' house to pick him up, which also served as my own visit home.

A big step! Before and after the great adventure

It's a matter of hindsight, but even an 8-year-old second-grade boy who was small for his age was able to have the adventure of riding the Shinkansen alone. (5 years ago)
In the end, there is no correct answer to "when," and I think the best timing for each family is when the child is motivated and the parents are prepared to let them go.
And after this adventure, my son became addicted to the slightly heart-pounding experience of "riding the train alone." He gradually increased the distance and frequency, but there is no doubt that this experience was the catalyst. There is no doubt that this adventure was a big step that led to what followed. For my son, and for us parents...

Since it's the middle of spring break, I thought some families might be considering such a challenge, so I summarized it while remembering that time. For me and my son, it's a very good memory now. Since there is no "correct answer," I'm sure you will worry a lot, but I hope this example is helpful to someone ^^