The Art of Asking Questions Without Asking 'Why' by Toyokazu Nakata

A book I've been curious about for a while
Apparently, asking 'Why?' is a bad idea
So, what should I ask instead?

This is a book that answers such simple questions

The Art of Asking Questions Without Asking 'Why'

Asking 'Why?' creates a fatal disconnect in conversation

When you ask 'Why?', it tends to sound like an interrogation
I understand that feeling

In development, when a bug occurs, there is a method called '5 Whys', but
when it's actually done to you, it feels like your spirit is being broken
It makes you want to say, 'How should I know!'
It feels like being pushed to the brink of a fight

When you ask 'Why?', the other person tries to force an answer andbrings out 'assumptions'
Perceptions that deviate from the facts are verbalized
They end up making excuses(This is a feeling anyone who has experienced it will understand)
This develops into 'assumptions'

And then,the assumptions become tangled

Nothing good comes of it

Asking 'How was it?' is also abstract and places a burden on the other person

If you ask 'What is the problem?', they might even fabricate a problem that doesn't exist

Highly abstract questions are dangerous, aren't they?

If you feel like asking 'Why?', what should you do instead?

When you feel like asking 'Why?',

→ Convert it to 'When', 'What', 'Where', or 'Who'

Among the 5W1H,
When, What, Where, and Who are (concrete and) OK
Why and How are NG (abstract)

Convert your questioning style to focus on more concrete facts

There are plenty of examples for other applications and various situations, showing how to rephrase things when you feel like saying them a certain way.

Ways of asking that make it easier for the other person to answer

The reason you feel like asking 'Why?' is because
you are in a situation where you assume the other person has a problem.

Ultimately, you want to change the other person's behavior,
so the feeling of 'Why aren't you doing that??' comes first,
leading you to ask 'Why?'

If that is the case, the higher-level goal is to
support the other person in thinking for themselves, realizing things, and changing their behavior
so that their perceptions and actions change in a positive direction.

• Confirm facts, not reasons

• Make abstract questions more concrete

• Be conscious of asking questions that are easy for the other person to answer

• Use the other person's words exactly as they are (do not paraphrase)

• Listen to what they have to say until the end

• Wait for the other person to realize things and change

• It is also okay to just look them in the eye and wait

If you can convey your desire to understand the other person, you can build a good relationship.

It's all about consideration and love for the other person
, isn't it? ^^)

A book that makes you feel the power of editing.

Regarding the structure of the book, my impression is that
laying out the main points and raising the issues in the opening preface is
simple and clean.

Also, the table of contents and headings are excellent.
Even just looking at the headings provides a high level of insight and satisfaction.

It's a victory for editing.

As expected of Diamond, Inc.

There are also plenty of web articles.

A wealth of web articles are also included.
It feels like they might cover the main points of the book, don't you think?
That's the impression.

(↑) Click here for the list.

This article was written by

Shigeki Kawahara, a 'Future Realization Partner' who helps increase revenue pillars
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