3 Things to Decide with Your Child Before Summer Break to Reduce Asking "Did You Do Your Homework?"

Well, summer break is about to begin.

Children are excited.
They have so much to look forward to.

"Where are we going for summer break?"
"I can't wait for the break to start!"

I hear those kinds of voices in my own home, too.

However, as summer break approaches, there is something that concerns us as parents.

That is, "summer homework".

Workbooks
worksheets
book reports
independent research projects
art and crafts
reading aloud
diaries
one-line journals
tablet assignments

The content varies by school and grade level, but summer homework is quite a significant presence for parents, isn't it?

Sometimes, even before the children do, parents start to feel a bit apprehensive.

😭 "I wonder if they'll finish it properly."
😭 "It feels like they'll end up doing it while crying at the very end."
😭 "It sounds exhausting to have to keep reminding them every single day."

Don't you have those kinds of anxieties?

As a parent myself, I understand that very well.

There is a phrase I end up saying once summer break starts.

"Did you do your homework?"

Even if I intend to ask lightly at first, the way I say it gradually becomes harsher if it continues every day.

"Did you do your homework?"
"You still haven't done it?"
"When are you going to do it?"
"I told you to do it early, didn't I?"

When it gets to this point, it's exhausting for the parent.
It's also exhausting for the child.

What's important to keep the parent-child relationship from becoming strained over summer homework is not for the parent to manage everything every day.

It is to decide things together as parent and child before it begins.

These are the three things I want to be mindful of in my own home as well.

✅ What homework is there?
✅ When to start the difficult assignments?
✅ When and how much will the parent check?

I believe that by deciding these three things in advance, you can reduce the number of times you ask "Did you do your homework?" a little.

Summer homework is a common source of conflict between parents and children.

Summer homework is a common source of conflict between parents and children.

The reason is simple.

"Because the period is long." is the reason.

✏️ You should do a little bit every day.
✏️ You should proceed according to a plan.
✏️ You should finish it early.

We know this in our heads.

But, in reality, it rarely goes that way.

For the first few days, you want to relax and enjoy the summer break mood.
Eventually, plans come up.
You go out to play.
It's too hot to feel motivated.
Before you know it, it's late August.

And then the parent gets anxious.

👿 "How much of your homework is finished?"
👿 "You still have this much left?"
👿 "That's why I told you to do it early!"

You want to say these things, don't you?

However, if parents manage it too much every day, it becomes exhausting for both the child and the parent.

On the other hand, leaving it completely up to the child is also difficult. is the case.

For children, summer homework is large in volume and covers a long period.

💪 The ability to look ahead.
💪 The ability to make a schedule.
💪 The ability to break down tasks.
💪 The ability to check what has been completed.

These skills are still in the process of developing.

Therefore, what is needed is not total management or complete neglect, but setting a clear outlook together at the beginning. is the key.

Decision 1: What homework is there?

First, what parents and children should decide and confirm is what homework there is.

Once summer break begins, try laying out all the homework first.

It can be on a desk, the floor, or in the living room.

Just make sure everything is visible at once.

Workbooks.
Printouts.
Diaries.
Book reports.
Independent research projects.
Craft projects.
Tablet assignments.

Just making this visible will reduce some of the anxiety for both parent and child.

'Not knowing what there is'

This is the scariest part.

When you lay it all out,

'This looks like it will finish quickly,'
'This looks like it will take time,'
'This might need a little help from a parent'

will become apparent.

What is important at this point is not to make overly detailed plans right away.

First, just look at the whole picture.

'So, this is what this year's homework is like.'

That alone is enough.

Thing to decide #2: When to start the difficult homework

Once you have laid out all the homework, the next thing to look at, rather than the volume, is the things that look difficult.

For example,

⚠️ Book reports
⚠️ Independent research projects
⚠️ Drawings
⚠️ Craft projects
⚠️ Research assignments
⚠️ Daily diaries

Homework like this becomes quite painful if left until the end.

Workbooks progress little by little if you do them.

However, independent research projects and essays start with deciding on a theme.

What to write about?
What to research?
Are materials needed?
How much time will it take?

It takes more time than you think.

That is why I think it is good to ask these questions at the beginning.

😊 "When will you start thinking about this?"
😊 "On what day will you decide just the theme for your independent research?"
😊 "When will you choose the book for your book report?"
😊 "Shall we check first if you need materials for your craft project?"

You do not need to finish everything here.

The important thing is to decide on a start date.

"Doing it sometime" usually ends up being put off.

So, while looking at the calendar,

"Shall we think about it a little on this day?"
"Shall we start during this week?"

Decide on that.

Just by doing that, the panic in late August will decrease a little.

Thing to decide #3: When and how much the parent will check

The third thing is when and how much the parent will check.

If you do not decide this, the parent will want to ask every day.

"Did you do your homework?"
"What did you do today?"
"How much have you finished?"

Of course, it is necessary to check in.

But, if you keep checking in detail every day, both parent and child will get tired.

Therefore, what I recommend is to decide on days to check.

For example,

Decide what to do for the week on Sunday.
Check in just once on Wednesday.
Review what was finished over the weekend.

Sometimes this much is enough.

Of course,adjustments are necessary depending on the grade level and the child's personality.

Some children feel more secure when you check in every day.
Some children can proceed quite well on their own.

However, parents do not need to keep checking everything every single day.

Things like, "It would be great if you could get this far this week,"
"Shall we take a look once on Wednesday?"
"Let me know if you have any trouble,"
"Shall we do the grading together?"

In this way, decide on the timing for parental involvement.

By doing so, parents will also feel a bit more at ease.

Children may also find it easier to act when they know
"I will have it checked on Wednesday"
rather than being asked suddenly every day.

What parents do is not to provide the answers.

There is no need for parents to help with all of the summer homework.

Thinking about the content of an essay.
The parent doing most of the independent research project.
The parent finishing the artwork.

If that happens, it becomes unclear whether it is the child's homework or the parent's homework.

What parents can do is not to provide the answers, but to help create a plan.

"When will you do it?"
"What will you start with?"
"About how many days do you think this will take?"
"Do you need materials?"
"Where do you want me to help if you get stuck?"

These are the kinds of prompts to use.

Support only where necessary while leaving room for the child to think for themselves.

I believe that is the important way for parents to be involved with summer homework.

Aim for a summer vacation where they can act on their own, rather than one where they don't have trouble at the end.

Of course, it is important to finish summer homework.

However, I don't think the only goal is for parents to manage everything and ensure it is completed perfectly.

Summer break is also a time for children to practice taking initiative little by little. as well.

💪 Make a plan.
💪 Choose what to do.
💪 Make progress little by little.
💪 Check what has been accomplished.
💪 Ask for help when in trouble.

These skills do not develop overnight.

That is precisely why we should use summer homework as an opportunity to practice them little by little.

It is okay if things don't go perfectly.

There will be days when things don't go according to plan.
There will be days when they slack off.
There will be days when parents need to prompt them.

Even so, if they can gain the experience of
"moving forward on their own"
little by little, that is a major growth.

Summer homework.

To reduce asking "Did you do your homework?", there are 3 things you should decide with your child before it starts.

✅ What homework is there
✅ When to start the difficult assignments
✅ When and how much the parent will check

Just by deciding these three things in advance, summer homework might become a little easier.

Parents don't have to carry the whole burden.

You don't have to leave everything entirely up to the child either.

Set a clear outlook together at the beginning, and then watch over them little by little.

I hope you can have that kind of summer break.

📖 Please also read this 📖

Summer vacation diary 🍉
"I don't know what to write~"
Have you ever heard this line? 🤣
I wrote an article for moms and dads who are struggling with diary and essay homework, on how to provide support. ✨
Please take a look when you are in trouble. ✨