A Fool's Resolution

I finally clicked the buy button.
For the Keygal.

My front door uses an electronic key. It's convenient, but it's a terrible match for a fool like me.

When I go for a run in the neighborhood, I leave the house with just the key in my jersey pocket.

After running home, I twice made the mistake of throwing the jersey with the key still in it into the washing machine, and as a result, the first Keygal met its end.

Since then, I've been using an analog key that you have to insert, but I finally made the decision to welcome a second Keygal.

Come to think of it, I only started writing again to earn the money for a Keygal. I earned the money quickly, but I just couldn't bring myself to buy it.

Ironically, the fact that the first Keygal didn't break after the first wash was the reason I hesitated to buy a new one.
I already have two prior offenses. I can't say for sure that I won't break a ten-thousand-yen key again.


I wish they would come out with an implantable version. It would be great if they could quantify foolishness and allow for surgery covered by insurance if you're above a certain level of foolish.

When I thought that and searched for it, I found that technology to unlock doors by implanting a microchip in your hand has already been developed. Apparently, the surgery takes two seconds.

Even if you're not a fool, you can get it done for 24,000 yen. That's just a little more than the cost of two Keygals.

The fact that such technology has been developed means there must be fellow fools all over the world.

In other words, human evolution is a battle against foolishness.
I was born a fool with the mission of further evolving humanity.

Wow, being a fool is a noble self-sacrifice.
If it's for the sake of human evolution, it can't be helped. I might as well commit to being a fool for the rest of my life.

Second Keygal, come to me quickly. And if you can, please come fully waterproofed.

Seriously

won't

wash

Never again!!!!

Oh, wait, the next one would be the third time.